OH strop because I advised he's going to be late for work..

[Fizzbombs]

OH has a new job. In his previous job he developed a habit of being late to the point it was addressed by his superiors. There was no real reason for lateness other than simply taking the mick because it was a generally relaxed environment.

He has been in his new job a little over a month, working the late shift from 10pm.

9.45 comes and he's still relaxing in the house, he's had 10 hours sleep so isn't tired. I tell him he's going to be late and does he not think it's a good idea to make a point of being punctual with this job as they're not going to stand for more of the same.

Visibly annoyed, he says "for god sake I might aswell just stay at work"

I ask what he's talking about and he said "well, you're making me feel bad for being a few minutes late" and left in a huff.

Was I being unreasonable here?

How would he feel if he was kept waiting at the end of his shift because a colleague hadn't turned up? I'm betting he would not be happy.

He prob on trial period so he beter watch it they wont keep someone on whose late

doesnt matter how hard he works-someone at DH's place (security) always comes in late and hes wisely hated as people are waiting for him so they can go home-its disrepectful

Wtf ? Literally stop saying anything even if it’s 9.59pm just act Normal. When he gets sacked, tell him what you really think

I worked somewhere with someone who would turn up at five past the hour and get onto the floor at quarter past every time, making the other person finish 15 mins late. I didn’t really get involved but it was made clear to this late person that people literally hated her .

Christ. He sounds ... I dunno .... so sub-standard as a human an adult.

But anyway, that's your problem, not mine.

Speak to him at a time completely separate from him getting ready for work, or late for work...

And tell him that - you have his best interests at heart, and you think making an effort to be punctual at work is an easy win. You've now said your piece and won't raise it again. But that he'd better believe you will be 'I told you so'-ing him repeatedly, when (not if) he gets told to move on, so it's over to him now.

My dh was always late to work when we were dating. He was also late to other things, but particularly work. We had a big chat about it and there were some reasons for it, for several reasons he had an anxiety about mornings. He dealt with that by withdrawing and hiding under the duvet.

He started getting up much earlier than needed so we could have a nice breakfast together (I'm an early riser so was awake anyway) and he had something to look forward to in the morning, rather than just the rush to get to work.

He much improved, but has since switched to a job where lateness is fine as long as you get your work done, and slipped back into old ways. Maybe a new job is your dp's solution

Watching tv before going to a night shift is a bad idea as the time just slips away. When I worked nights, I'd try to have a nice social dinner with housemates, then have a shower, get ready and go. No slobbing around, because it can be tempting to stay rather than go out in dark for work.

I found working nights really tiring, even if rested, and I always dreaded going to work. Not the best job choice for somebody with lateness issues.

Someone needs to make it clear that this is a problem before his work bosses do, by which time they will be really pissed off. The problem is, it can't be you as you are only his woman, so.... I don't know the answer

It's possible he knows you're right now you've said your piece, but he can't show it. That's the best case scenario

Otherwise - can you get someone else to tell him without him knowing it came from you?

It's because he believes he is more important than his colleagues. I'm sure it won't be long till he's pulled up on and possibly fired.
Great work ethic, not......
Why should he work less hours than he's paid for?

If he's been there a little over a month, is he in a probationary period? If so, he's going the wrong way about getting through it.

If I had a staff member who was consistently late and they were still in their probationary period then they would be told to leave.

I don't expect people to arrive early but consistent lateness is totally unacceptable.

He's going to lose his job if he doesn't stop behaving like a lazy teenager.

Even my 3yo hurries when I say we might be late for nursery.
This would really annoy me op, I'm assuming he was late to work as you say it's a 30 minute drive. He'll be out on his ear soon.
Lateness is very disrespectful.

Just to say we're in an environment where we're paid set hours (in our case 10-6) and we're paid hourly so staff who are late would just get their pay docked.

There is no option to come in early or finish late to make up hours as we're in a shop and only open for eight hours a day, hence the strict timings!