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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think she's in the UK

358 replies

Courtney555 · 09/11/2019 20:58

Anyone who has a bit of tech knowledge greatly appreciated here....

My friend is abroad. Been there since Weds due back tomorrow morning. I've called her mobile a couple of times, got the international dial tone, as per normal.

Today, called at lunch. International tone still. She's told me again she's flying back in the morning. I called her just now to double check flight time and it's ringing with a standard UK ringtone like the phone is in the UK?

Does this mean she's in the UK now? She's a really good long term friend with no reason at all to fib. There's literally no reason why she'd tell me she was back tomorrow morning instead of tonight (it's like 14hrs difference) so can this happen by accident? Google is not helping.

I know she's on EE. Could the phone have picked up a UK network out there (Cyprus) and that's why the dial tone has changed this evening.

I hope this is a common occurrence with phones, I'm just a bit "hmmmmm" because since it's rung like it's in the UK she hasn't read my WhatsApps or returned the call.

Please tell me you've had experience of this to put my mind at ease. I know it's really none of my business at the end of the day, but I'd like to know if she could still be legitimately out there and it's just the phone playing silly buggers.

Thank you in advance...

OP posts:
Chickenwing · 10/11/2019 20:35

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ohwellherewegoagain · 10/11/2019 20:45

Well, from experience, I know you can get different ringtones in France, depending on what network your phone connects to. So there is a reasonable possibility your friend isn't lying to you. If it turns out that she is, you may want to think about why she told you she was away - do you think you could be a little bit unwittingly suffocating her?

BayandBlonde · 10/11/2019 21:03

Sounds all like a load of bullshit.

OP got such a flaming for being a mad, stalking, oddball that of course it now needs to be played down. This is OPs update a few posts back:

"She's fine  I woke up to several missed calls from her, just called her back (it rang internationally straight away this morning??!) and she had just fallen asleep. She's fluffed the flight times and getting back much later than she thought, so she's getting the last train in this direction as far as she can and I'm getting her from a station about an hour away."

TrainspottingWelsh · 10/11/2019 21:04

So you have a friend close enough you'll do a 5hr round trip to collect them from the airport. But because their phone rang differently it's entirely rational to assume they are lying about their flight. And rather than use google to find an explanation, you ask a forum full of people you consider inferior. And anyone that doesn't agree this is normal behaviour has difficulty reading, is a crayola using twat and most insulting of all, might not have been around 15yrs.

Now my illiterate little mind has managed to grasp the full facts I can clearly see that op is entirely reasonable and definitely not an unhinged stalker.

And btw, on your next thread where you ask for night vision goggles recommendations, if the thread goes the same way and you decide to respond by insulting the intelligence of other posters, you'll probably want to insult their comprehension skills, rather than their reading skills. HTH.

MILfatigue · 10/11/2019 21:43

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doublebarrellednurse · 10/11/2019 21:45

Yes you can get a normal dial tone on a mobile phone when it's abroad.

My father travels a lot. Sometimes I get a dial tone that's uk sometimes it's international. He's definitely still abroad.

Maybe your friend doesn't want you calling her every five mins whilst she's on holiday.

Cassandrainthenight · 10/11/2019 21:46

@Wintersleep unless you were calling an overseas network number it wouldn't have cost you any extra. If you are calling any UK number from UK you are paying your normal charges, how can your provider charge you extra just because your recipient happens to be in Antarctica or wherever?

Cassandrainthenight · 10/11/2019 21:50

@littlehappyhippo

Several people have corrected you already but it's the same as above, I'm quite amazed it even occurs to people that they would be randomly charged for ringing or texting UK number as if it was a foreign number Confused

Wintersleep · 10/11/2019 21:53

@Cassandrainthenight no it didn't cost me anything, she just didn't know that :) I did have to Google at the time as I wasn't 100% sure myself!

nuxe1984 · 10/11/2019 22:21

Why are you so concerned whether she's still abroad or come back to the UK?

Maybe she got the arrival time mixed up or maybe she came back early. And if she did it's really nothing to do with you … and she surely doesn't have to get your permission to do so????

Stop the stalking behaviour!

z0fl0ra · 10/11/2019 23:22

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Derbee · 11/11/2019 01:24

on your next thread where you ask for night vision goggles recommendations

@TrainspottingWelsh again, hilarious 😂

NiceViper · 11/11/2019 07:50

"Why are you so concerned whether she's still abroad or come back to the UK?"

Try RTFT - the house sitting and the lift are important enough reasons.

But as she'll be happily back by now, does it still matter?

MrsFoxPlus4Again · 11/11/2019 11:50

@NiceViper she wasn’t even house sitting, reading the full thread she was just driving by and having a quick glance 😂

winniestone37 · 11/11/2019 13:09

If her phone is switched off/out of battery it will be a Uk dial tone.

winniestone37 · 11/11/2019 13:16

Probably one of the most ridiculous threads ever Grin

Emwahs · 11/11/2019 13:39

I have just phoned my parents in Madeira and was a usual UK ring tone.

TrainspottingWelsh · 11/11/2019 21:19

Derbee surely not, op has already told us all we are not at all amusing Grin

Wauden · 11/11/2019 22:27

I tried writing with a crayola but it came out all sensible and perceptive.

Aroundnabout1 · 12/11/2019 06:52

Did OP never update this thread?

Derbee · 12/11/2019 08:15

Never updated. I suspect she’s too busy doing drivebys of the house, or her friends place of work to see if she’s back.

Cassandrainthenight · 12/11/2019 09:21

Of course she updated, don't OP's posts come up in a different colour for you? If they don't, you probably need to change something in your settings, it's extremely inconvenient otherwise.

Derbee · 12/11/2019 10:08

@Cassandra I know how to use mumsnet thanks. OP said

I woke up to several missed calls from her, just called her back (it rang internationally straight away this morning??!) and she had just fallen asleep. She's fluffed the flight times and getting back much later than she thought, so she's getting the last train in this direction as far as she can and I'm getting her from a station about an hour away

But presumably the PP meant an update as to whether holiday friend got back, and whether the urgent issue the OP had supposedly seen at her house was resolved.

Or whether the urgent thing she’d seen was a red herring, to add weight to why she needed to justify her bizarre behaviour

greeneyedlulu · 12/11/2019 10:22

You sound like a stalker and to be fair she's a grown woman whose capable of going on holiday so she's capable of sorting out a taxi if needed especially if you have to put yourself out to organise child care just to pick her up

Emeraldshamrock · 12/11/2019 10:26

Give her some space. This intense friendship would give me a stroke.