Late invitations!

[needmoresleep1]

If you receive an invite for a child's party and it's very short notice so it's obvious that someone else has pulled out and they're just filling a space do you accept and just go or decline if they weren't originally invited?

Not going seems like cutting off your nose to spite your face.

Just go. It's for your child and not you.

I don't care if I was a reserve list invitee as long as I get invited!

In fact, I think I got my first ever post-university job because they offered it to someone else first and they declined. The reason being that when I started other people said they'd been phoned and received a letter a couple of days after their interview, whereas I only found out about two weeks after mine that I had been offered the job and only by post. I didn't know it at the time but it certainly wouldn't have put me off accepting.

Send your child. As a pp said, don't cut your nose off to spite your face.

Surely it depend me if your child wants to go

Wouldn’t care, if my child wanted to go and we could, then I would.

Doesn’t bother me at all. I totally get it - there are often number limitations for parties. My DD got a late invite recently that was clearly because someone else couldn’t make it. She was thrilled to be invited, never occurred to me not to take her just because she wasn’t a first choice invite. She can’t be everyone’s best friend.

Some parties have a limit on how many can be invited.... your child cannot be best buds with everyone .... it doesn’t mean that the birthday child wouldn’t have ideally wanted your child there originally. I would go and think nothing of it.

I know I get it, we have always said yes (if we're free) but just seems she's ALWAYS the one for last min invites.

Ps everyone always comments on what a lively girl she is so it's not her behaviour or anything.

*lovely not lively

My son (6) wanted to invite every one in his class last year but it was too expensive so we invited 20 in total - about 14 accepted - if he’d had asked if I could’ve sent 6 more invites out to fill the spaces, I would’ve agreed to - he’s friends with everyone... maybe the birthday child is too... don’t take it personally OP - children’s friendships can be so fickle at this age.

Accept if your child wants to go. Often things have a limit of 8 or so so having a second round is the only sensible thing to do.

If she always seems like an afterthought then no, I wouldn’t accept.

If she always seems like an afterthought then no, I wouldn’t accept.

Won’t that mean she doesn’t get invited at all?

You are massively overthinking this. If you're free and she wants to go, take her. Refusing just for the sake of it isn't going to change the invitations she gets in the future.

Ask your DC and do what they want?

How do you know they have only been invited because others have dropped out? What ‘short notice’? I only remember to send invites out to everyone about two weeks before!

I count short notice as the same week as the party

I count short notice as the same week as the party

I think you’ve got a different definition of short notice competed with most other parents!

I just invited someone to my daughters party tomorrow on Monday, because she’s just said “is jack coming?” I never thought to invite jack, because I don’t know who all her friends are. It turns out he can’t make it anyway but I explained to his mum that my nearly 3 year old would like him to come and would rather have asked than not!

I go, if my child wants to go. I wouldn't take any offence, there's a whole host of reasons why.

Wouldn't bother me at all. I had to do the last minute inviting once - DD was having a very small birthday sleepover and at the last minute, one of her friends had to pull out because she was poorly. I just phoned the mum of the girl on DD's 'reserve' list, explained the situation apologetically, told her to not bring a present, we'd just be delighted if her DD could come. The mum was very gracious and brought her straight over with a nice present!!

Are you sure you’re in the second round of invites? We (along with everyone else) were given an invitation this week for a party this weekend.

@Alloftheboys "Are you sure you’re in the second round of invites? We (along with everyone else) were given an invitation this week for a party this weekend."

I wonder if that was us? We organised a party for my dc's and partners dc's today- the invites only went out on Monday!

There are a few reasons, one is that we're ridiculously busy... 5 kids is a nightmare to coordinate, me and DP have got horrible deadlines at the moment and we moved house recently. Another reason was that we took an available slot for the party which I think must've been a cancellation rather than waiting. Lastly, the last party I organised was the only one that ever had 100% responses! I figure because people actually know their plans for certain buy then.

I really hope that those that didn't come weren't judging us...

@needmoresleep1

I'd go... if I had nothing else on.

If the invitation was a few days before.

Bet you can't beat THIS though.

We moved into No 17 in our street... (some 7-8 years back.) Our neighbour at No 19 was Laura, and our neighbours at No 15, were Ann and John.

Laura at No 19 was having a party for her DS who was 9. We were not invited, but Laura came round to ask us to it, an HOUR into it.

We were having our evening meal at the table, and had the news on the TV, and she knocked on the door. DH answered and the neighbour said 'you wanna come to our party?'

She had been prattling on about it for about a month, and around 40 people were invited, including about a dozen neighbours, but we had not been invited. IMO it was because she was jealous of how well me and DH got on with our other neighbours Ann and John (at No 15.)

When Ann at No 15 said (in front of Laura at No 19,) that she loved us as neighbours, and asked us round for coffee once or twice a month, Laura at No 19 (with the 9 y.o.boy) was seething and went very red. I presented no threat, but she didn't like me, and often left me (and DH and our kids) out when she was arranging something.

Long story short, Ann at No 15, asked her several times (at the DS's 9th birthday party,) why we weren't there. (Especially as we had taken a card and gift round for her DS the day before.) So 'Laura' felt obliged to come ask us - an hour INTO the party.

DH came into the dining room and said 'do you wanna go?' I said 'no I bloody don't. Who asks someone to come to a party, an hour into it?!' 'Afterthought much?' (Our kids didn't want to go either.)

Don't know if she heard and don't care. But DH went back to the door and said 'nah it's too late in the day now sorry. We are having dinner, and have plans for the evening.' She looked embarrassed, and slunk off...

When Ann at No 15 asked me (a few days later,) why we didn't come, I was honest. I said we were not invited, and we weren't coming after being asked an HOUR into the party. She was gobsmacked, as she thought we had been invited a few weeks before, and just hadn't turned up.

Not long after - Laura and her DS did a moonlight flit, owing £3000 rent! Never seen or heard of again!