To go against SS recomendations

[wherewithallwithout]

I posted this in parenting but didn't get any response so I thought I would post here for a bit more traffic.

Have name changed as v outing.

Trying to keep a long story short without drip feeding.

My ex took me to court a few years ago as I refused 50/50 contact and maintained that my daughter (5 at the time, 8 now) was better off with me more in term time as it is more settling for her. I won the case and the court ordered 5/14 which I thought worked v well.

I have suffered from mental health problems since a teen. After the court case and subsequent break down of a relationship with my ex they got progressively worse and I was unable to get my daughter to school on time and unable to leave the house due to panic attacks. My new partner would take her in and I would collect her but sometimes she would be waiting a while as I was unable to leave the house.

I made consistent errors around time keeping as I found myself falling further and further down a deep dark hole, social services became involved, and then my partner left me. I let my daughter down and my ex had to step in and look after her full time over the summer as I had to try and recoup and recover.

Social services put DD on a child in need plan and told me that I was to engage with them. However the appointments I had to get to were impossible for me - I can barely leave the house so I was never able to make appointments on time.

Because they see me as not engaging with them they have recommended that my ex go back to court and amend the court order so that he has full custody. I am not eligible for legal aid so if I was to contest I would need to represent myself. I am looking to make a complaint against the sw as I feel they gave me no mental health support at all and I had no chance to get better.

In the last month I have found mental health support and I feel positive for the first time in years. I am confident that I can get back on track and be able to have DD 9/14 again. My ex is being supportive and letting me see her for overnights on a Saturday and a few hours in the week at the moment and I have had her for half of half term. He is adamant he will still go to court despite my progress in the last few weeks. The court date is for the beginning of December.

Am I wasting my time thinking I can contest this?

I understand that there will be a cafcass report and I'm hoping to show them that I am trying my best to get better for DD.

Ss should have arranged a taxi to transport her dd to and from school.

Nowhere near the same as this but I was referred to ss as I was struggling to get my daughter to school on time (she has asd and was refusing to go, and I wasn’t going to drag her there) SS came around, they did not offer support (that is not their job, as someone said they are not a support service that people seem to believe they are, they are not here to support parents) I was simply told “other mothers manage” I was not offered taxi services (and that’s with a child with a disability) I think you’re living in fantasy land if you think they offer taxis if someone can’t get their kid to school. Obviously mine was nowhere near as serious as the op as the case was closed pretty quickly but if there is another parent who is willing and able to take the child to school obviously ss are going to believe that is the best place for them.

I noticed you haven't come back OP. I hope you're okay

At one point staff from the school have volunteered to do the morning run for me. School nearby, I never asked. I just mentioned the difficulties I was having and the person offered. When I knew we would be late I contacted the school. Cannot say it was down to one school, they’ve attended several schools who did what they could do under the circumstances.
After school if I needed it, there was a club which allowed me time. I wanted to avoid the crowd and I worked with the school because yes it helped me.

@PumpkinP did the school not offer any help? Some of the schools mine attended and I worked in was sn schools. From time to time we would help the parent with the school run, alter times for pick up/drop off, go and see the pupil at home of long term ill, long waits for lift repairs etc. It was something that we asked our head to do, but not widely known to parents as we knew some would take the piss out of our generosity.