To think that if you have the funds to pay for your care home needs then you absoloutley should?

[BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz]

Interesting chat with a friend the other day about the extortionate costs of care homes and how if you live in social housing/rental and are on benefits then the government will pay for your care yet if you have "worked hard all your life and want to leave something for your kids" you are made to sell your home / use savings to pay for your care.

Friend is of the opinion that everyone who requires a care home should have it paid for by the government. So essentially a "hand out" yet also is of the opinion that those on benefits are getting "hand outs" and looks on them with scorn.

My personal opinion is that if you have the means to fund your own care home needs then yes; you absoloutley should pay for some or all of that. Why should the government fork out millions for every care home resident in the country so that a vast amount of them can then hand their properties and extensive savings down to their children?

It's simply not viable to fund 100% of care home needs across the country and if you are the kind of person who gets smug about "paying my way all my life" to the tune of living mortgage free in a 300k plus home with vast savings then you should be happy to continue "paying your way" til the end.

I also pointed out to her that as she will be funding her own care she will likely have more say in where she goes.

The end result was we both agreed the best solution was to swerve the care home altogether but I wondered whether I was BU to expect someone who can afford to pay for their care to actually pay for their care?

Can I ask how you will feel should they need care @mrschu

Eleanor if they need care and me and my brother feel the best place is expensive we can use the house and savings to pay that, but that would be through a choice of paying it not from being forced to

No I won’t be keeping the money for myself and I won’t be doing 24/7 care for my Mum.

I did domicillary care for 18 months. It was by far the minority of my SUs who had family they even regularly saw let alone received any help from.

I think there should be a cap ie 60% of an individual's wealth/property

It does leave you a bit vulnerable. I could do the same but what if you fall out with ur dc etc. It can happen.

I don't agree with private residents subsidising state funded ones at all.

I remember my friends df dying mid month and then then the home being really difficult about refunding overpaid fees as you were meant to give notice (as if) so someone else can occupy the room.

Is Long-Term Care Insurance available for purchase there? If you've worked hard all your life and want to leave your kids something, you could plan for the future by purchasing it, if it's available.

@Acciocats I agree. If everyone took that same attitude there would be no money for benefits etc.

That’s the problem with socialism, eventually someone else’s money runs out.

@MrsChuckBass good luck with that. Pretty sure it would be seen as deprivation of assets and the council will come after you anyway.

Can you sign over your house to avoid paying ? I didn’t think you could and if they found out they’d charge you anyway. Seem to remember strict rules when looking into care homes for family. If not I’ll be looking into doing that. It’s going to be impossible for my dc to own their own house, our equity is their only chance of a decent retirement and possibly a decent sized house.

@MrsChuckBass good luck with that. Pretty sure it would be seen as deprivation of assets and the council will come after you anyway.

Not only that but the taxman will soon be asking you and your brother for his share of the market rent they’re supposed to be paying you. Anyone who’s done this clearly hasn’t taken legal advice.

Can you sign over your house to avoid paying ? I didn’t think you could and if they found out they’d charge you anyway

You can't just sign your house over to avoid care home fees and it doesn't matter how long ago you did it either (e.g there is no seven year rule). The council can and will force a sale of your house, no matter who it 'belongs' to.

My mil was in a home for a few weeks before she died. Went to collect her belongings the day after she died and someone was already in her room surrounded by my mil 's things!
Other homes are good and doing their best but for others it's just a business.
As I said before, I'm dreading getting older: it's no fun, expensive and never stops costing money even after your died. It's quite depressing actually!

Tg for deprivation of assets ruling otherwise too many people would be doing that.

I know a lot of solicitors recommended the course of action MrsChuckBass has taken, but I am sure it now comes under deprivation of assets now, so wouldn't be valid.

Also if they still live in it without paying you market rent then it will be included in their estate for IHT purposes.

What happens if you move in with your parent, to avoid having to sell?

Mrschuck there's no time limit on councils searching back years looking for 'deprivation of assets' so you might come unstuck there.
When people want 'the governement' to pay for their care, what they mean is other tax payers. I do not think I should pay for my neighbours' care home just so she can sit of hundreds of thousands and her DC inherit. She doesn't need the house, and what else are our life savings for if not to ensure care and comfort in your old age. If you don't want to risk losing it all, then spend it. You make a choice.
This country cannot afford sentiment whilst modern medicine continues to extend our lives at all cost and many people live too long.

Well I don’t think I should pay for people who choose to rent, get into debt and fritter the money home owners and savers invest.

What happens if you move in with your parent, to avoid having to sell?

Nothing, if you’re over 60.

Well I don’t think I should pay for people who choose to rent, get into debt and fritter the money home owners and savers invest.

I agree

I think if you can afford to pay then you should, but I disagree with private payers effectively subsidising those who are state funded by paying higher fees - this is really unfair and ultimately means they run out of money quicker that they have worked hard for. I would have completely separate establishments for self funders and those who are state funded.

I agree private shouldn’t pay higher fees

It’s just appalling. A family member’s house has paid for two years care, extortionate and she’ll be bumped out now the funds have dried up.

Eveyone does pay for their care to s certain extent. People who have their care fees funded by the state have to pay some of their state pension towards fees and aren’t eligible for benefits such as Attendance Allowance. Where as a person paying would still be eligible for this benefit if they meet the criteria which there’s a fair chance they would if they need a care/nursing home.

I wish my mum had a house we could sell to pay for her care. There are two excellent care homes within walking distance from us. There's another two a quick bus ride away.

But mum is in a home (a very kind one - a bit run down but clean and the staff are great with her) which is 10 miles away, not on a bus route. That means I can only visit at the weekend as DH needs the car for his work.

Had she had a home to sell she'd have had the choice of the other four but they're in the upper band for Council care and we couldn't afford the difference.

As for this idea that people who own their own home somehow worked harder. My parents both worked, they did shift work as they couldn't afford child care so mum did a factory twilight shift. Dad did a job starting at 5am. Mum would take us to school, Dad would pick us up and feed us as mum had to be in work at 3pm. Dad would get us ready for bed, mum would arrive back home at 9.30pm. They also did piece work at home - sewing stuffed toys - at the weekend. But they were never in highly paid jobs.

My parents would have loved to have been in the position to 'leave something to the kids' and I'd have encouraged either of them to use the money to make their last days as happy as possible. Whether that was a few great holidays because both were well or to pay for a better standard of care because they weren't - it amounts to the same thing

She’d have only had the choice whilst she was paying a hell of a lot more for the same care. Then when the money was dwindling she’d be living in fear of being bumped out and not know where she’d be going. You also have no idea the sacrifices and hard work others have done to save money.

It’s an appalling system and gives no incentive to save at all.