To hate the phrase 'RIP' ?

[ChongADong]

It just seems so insincere, so brief and without warmth. I also kind of equate it to horror movies/graves/skeletons. I'm sure it may just be me!
AIBU?

Really don't like RIP either. Comes across as very insincere. If you must use it, write it out in full. But I much prefer a more personal message. Same with the heartbreak emoji - I don't think it's appropriate for a death.

Also agree with posters re not saying "died". I would always say passed away as died can be too blunt and upsetting. It feels more polite to say passed away. Everyone knows what it means.

Passed away pisses me off. People die. We’re as coy about death as the Victorians were about sex. There’s no need for it. And as for RIP ... what other condition are people going to rest in when they’re dead? With you all the way, OP.

I hate the phrase "passed on" or "passed over" (or just "passed".

What's wrong with saying "died"?

@TheMustressMhor
When my Mum died, I found it very difficult to say that actual word. It seemed so final. Obviously I know it is final, but in the early days of overwhelming grief it was easier to tell people that my Mum had "passed" than say the D word. It was just a tad gentler on my broken heart. So please don't judge if someone uses it, they may be in great pain.

I hate the phrase "passed on" or "passed over" (or just "passed".

What's wrong with saying "died"?

@TheMustressMhor
When my Mum died, I found it very difficult to say that actual word. It seemed so final. Obviously I know it is final, but in the early days of overwhelming grief it was easier to tell people that my Mum had "passed" than say the D word. It was just a tad gentler on my broken heart. So please don't judge if someone uses it, they may be in great pain.

I've always hated it! Something like 'Rest peacefully now' or the phrase written out is at least a bit better!

I have American friends and I’ve noticed they say Rest in Love on social media when speaking about someone who has died

I dont mind it written but please say the full thing Rest in Peace, however i have experienced some losses where the dead person was very young and not really a "peaceful " type (think party girl/lad type) so not sure it fits them.
People wrote "party in heaven" on dp s cards etc.
I dont like died or death. It feels so cold.

I don't mind RIP but really hate 'passed away' or it's variations.

It's so effete. What's wrong with dead/died?

We are born and then we die. It's final - we don't 'pass away'. It wasn't even in the vernacular until the 1970s or so.

*its

I am in the minority here, but I can't see anything wrong with R.I.P.

WTF? People moan about (and are offended by,) just about everything these days.

The term RIP has been around for centuries. I really don't think it needs analysing as to its level of sincerity.

It's simply a traditional, long standing phrase to use after a death.

I hate it too, for the reasons you've given.

At least take the time to type it out, rather than a quick RIP, just so you can join the grief brigade.

I don't think some people actually realise why it means or stands for. A little girl died in my city a few weeks ago, some idiot posted on the news story 'Hope her family RIP'. So insensitive.

I don't mind 'butty' - in the olden days, a butty was a slice of buttered bread in certain parts of the country. So a 'cheese butty' makes sense. 'Sarnie' or 'sammich' are dreadful though.

Also not a fan of 'passed away' or even worse, 'passed over'. Passed over to where? The angles?

As for R.I.P., I know it seems insincere but it's sometimes difficult to know what to say when someone has died so it probably seems like the safest option.

We should be more frank about death though. Brushing it under the carpet is no good for the bereaved and those who wish to be in control and plan a good death.

I hate seeing RIP as the final entry in people's medical/nursing notes. It just seems so lazy and slap-dash.

If I'm verifying a patient's death, as a nurse, I always write it out in full with their name 'Rest in peace Muddyboots'.

I got fed up with I’m sorry for your loss or I’m sorry you lost your sister.

I upset one person when when they said that - I saId I didn’t lose her she fucking died...it’s not like I dropped her off somewhere and forgot to pick her up...or she was a set of keys I’d put down. Nopes she dead. She hasn’t passed on, etc she’s bloody dead!

People are so bloody odd when it comes to death 🤷‍♀️ it makes them uncomfortable so they come out with stupid phrases, as a pp said they read like bereavement cards...

Rest in peace is a nice phrase.

RIP is horrendous and yes I judge people who use it.

How about just saying 'ta'ra a bit!' Seeing as how R.I.P. is SO offensive?!

@MyNameIsMrsGrumpy

I am sorry your sister died, but there is really no need to yell in the face of someone offering you condolences, just because they said 'sorry you lost your sister.'

FGS, I have lost quite a few people close to me, and so have many others, but we don't all yell and scream at them for saying what we deem as the 'wrong' terminology.

It is hard to know what to say though.

Rest in peace is fine but RIP sounds like haloween jargon. Really ghoulish.

No problem with RIP. Hate it when it says 'fell asleep on....'.

Seems like a good time to ask, is there an equivalent of this website in the UK?

[[//www.rip.ie]]

There’s no one accepted way to say these things. If you know the sentiment is good then why should the terminology matter? I say Lost or Passed away for example because it sticks in my throat to say my loved ones have died/are dead.

I don't think I'd use RIP if I was discussing a person, especially not a person close to me. Rest in peace maybe. But RIP is for stuff like broken phones or ideas that don't work.