How do slim people think?

[Episcomama]

...because I really do think there is a difference between how slim and overweight people think. I am very overweight - BMI of 33. So obese rather than overweight, technically.

I've been off and on diets all my adult life, and the only thing I've really had success with is intermittent fasting and keto. When I stick to it, it works. The problem isn't my body, it's my mind. It's as though there's a switch that gets flicked from time to time. A voice in my head telling me to eat in case of famine. Food occupies much of my waking hours - once I've had a meal I'm thinking ahead to the next one.

A dear friend is very slim and once mentioned that she just doesn't really find satisfaction in food in the way I do (comfort, commiseration, celebration, whatever.) When I spent the weekend with her recently, it really became apparent how differently we see food. She was mildly horrified at both the quantity and frequency of my meals whereas I couldn't understand how she was satisfied with what she ate.

Eating disorders aside, do you think there's a difference between a "thin mind" and a "fat mind", to express it crudely. And if you have a thin mind and used to have a fat mind, can you share with me how you flicked that switch?

Alwaysgrey
Loneliness often leads to over eating. Food is one thing we can count on.

have a friend who is 59 and she says that clothes sizes have changed over the years, apparently a size 8 now would have been size 10 in the 1970s, is this true?

Can't speak for the 70s, but a size 8 today was a size 12 in the late 80s/early 90s.

As I mentioned upthread I still have and wear clothes from then. They have a 12 label. A 12 today would hang off me like a tent. I'm an 8 today. I weigh exactly the same, but am a little thicker through the waist since having children.

It's called vanity sizing and is a well known phenomena.

A fish supper between four people is a very small portion indeed.

When the fish is about the length and width of an adult forearm and there are 3 cups of chips around it it’s plenty.

Vanity sizing? Mmn I have never heard of this...Although isn’t it just a woman preferring to be a smaller size because it sounds better?

There’s no way I’m a 12 (see vanity) nowadays though.

Different answers to my statement about clothes being different sizes though...

I am 50 and am slim and always have been (size 4-6, 5'2"). Never dieted, never weighed myself and only know my weight from weigh-ins at doctors offices. I don't think about calories and don't deny anything from my diet.

I love food, really good food (a varied diet with well prepared meals from excellent ingredients) and told I am quite a good cook. I also love to bake and bake my own breads and cakes. Yes I eat biscuits, cakes and ice creams, but that I am happy with 1 biscuit, a small sliver of cake or a small scoop of ice cream. Beyond that, I honestly get no pleasure so I stop.

I cook to enjoy food with my family and friends and cannot understand comfort eating alone. In fact, eating until my stomach was distended whether alone or in company is something which is unpalatable and unfathomable to me. Also, I don't get any pleasure from eating processed junk food - the taste profile is one dimensional and not something I would actively seek to put in my mouth.

I suppose I would describe the way I eat as Mindful Eating - I eat what I want and just until I lose interest and stop when I have had enough.

Additionally, I love to exercise and get far more comfort and pleasure in a long run than binge eating junk.

26, 5ft8 and 9.5stone, and toned.
I exercise a lot because I eat a lot.
I love food, and I especially love unhealthy food. I don;t have nay self control when it comes to chocolate.
Therefore I have to exercise to stay this weight.

Finally a thread talking about eating habits where both slim and overweight people can post their attitude to food without it turning into a battle trying to justify ourselves and drawing conclusions on the others.

And 18 pages of it, very interesting posts, much learning. Very refreshing!

This is very interesting.

I'm normal weight, I guess bmi of 20, 21 or something. I've always been to other normal or slightly underweight.

Recently I spent the day (like from wee hours til late that night) and every couple of hours they were asking me if I wanted food and if I was hungry. Of course I was stuffed after a big breakfast that they'd prepared. And don't even want lunch til about 2. Then I was done for the day because for me they were big portions.

My friend is very big. It wasn't until the evening I realised they were asking me because they were so hungry , so I ate then so that they didn't feel uncomfortable and I felt like I'd been an ass all day. Clearly they were hungry all day, they went from one meal to the next.

I couldn't keep up with that intake. I realise only now how different our approaches to food is.

I had had enough calories. My body wasn't hungry.

I'm slim, 9st size 10 and 5ft 7, my weight sometimes fluctuates if I over indulge in food and alcohol I can see it in the mirror and just go back to eating healthy. I normally have breakfast later in the day, sayI 10ish as I'm not hungry when I wake up. I have the odd snack during the day and then dinner. I used to snack alot in the evening but now I don't feel that hungry. I will have a couple of drinks over the weekend but not tons. I also notice I lose weight when I completely stop drinking. I often only eat when my belly tells me its hungry and I know when my belly is full and I don't feel the need to clear my plate if I feel full. I also walk every where so the exercise probably helps aa well.

@Inappropriatefemale

I have a friend who is 59 and she says that clothes sizes have changed over the years, apparently a size 8 now would have been size 10 in the 1970s, is this true?

Actually I think it's worse as @PunkHairToday says. I was a size 12 at 6th form in the 80s. I was skinny as. I look emaciated on the photos (I'm nearly 5'10'). I was also a dressmaker as was my mother and my waist was 26". A size 12 was 34'/ 26"/36".

A mate had a laura ashley dress in a size 10 that I tried on and I could barely breathe.

I'm now 36" 30" 40", so two whole sizes bigger, and I now wear a size 12 in most stores and a size 10 in some. But I don't think it's "vanity" sizing - my mother was a size 12 when "slim" in the 80s but she's 5'3" - we are all taller and therefore to be "bigger" is in proportion and healthy. I have one of her old size 16 jackets from the 70s and it fits me like a glove.

Vanity sizing? Mmn I have never heard of this...Although isn’t it just a woman preferring to be a smaller size because it sounds better?

No, it’s shops marking bigger clothes as smaller sizes so people are pleased at what they fit in to and therefore more likely to buy them.

Sorry for bad post-I wish we could edit!

Vanity sizing? Mmn I have never heard of this...Although isn’t it just a woman preferring to be a smaller size because it sounds better?

Basicly shops noticed that women bought more clothes if they size number was lower so as women have got bigger they've changed the sizes to keep the sales up.

If you are at the small end of the spectrum to start with it's really noticeable.

I've been joking for years that by the time I'm 70 I'll have achieved the mythical size 0 without ever losing an ounce.

When I see other women that are size 8s then I feel like I’m bigger than them and when I’m in a shop and I am asking the sales assistant something and they have taken a guess at my size (shop assistants should never guess a female customers size as it’s likely they will offend) then they always say ‘size 10 yes’ and it boils my blood! Sure I had a long winter jacket on, but still.

Oh, and the average woman in the UK is actually marginally shorter now due to immigration from parts of the world with smaller stature so it really isn't about people being taller.

I don't think dress sizes matter a jot really. Most people should be able to tell if they are fat by standing naked in front of the mirror.

The real problem is that being overweight has become the norm. So people have developed a skewed image of what slim looks like.
You can look just 'chubby' and actually be obese, in terms of BMI.

People have different metabolisms. I have a tendency to be apple shaped even though I am slim. I also don't have a lot of muscle mass.

If I overeat, the weight goes on very fast. I'd say in an average day I could eat 100% more than what I do eat. But after years of learning what I can eat, I've also learned to say 'no' and just stop before I'm really full.
I eat most foods and even the occasional treat like a pudding but I will have a very small portion ( about half or a 1/4 of a normal large portion) and enjoy that.

A fish supper between four people is a very small portion indeed

If we get fish and chips we get 3 x fish and one x chips. It's enough for us.

...size 8s fit me though as do some 10s but obviously I’m going to grab the smaller size, see vanity sizing, I’m getting it!

I actually prefer S, M, L sizing as I’m usually always a S!

I'm pretty big, though after 3 years of effort I am not obese any more.

I dont think about food - I eat it. I dont get up and think about what to have for tea, I get up and stand at the fridge eating white bread and butter while thinking about something else. I think more slim people are mindful eaters.

I also dont have white bread in the house if I can avoid it because I will literally have a wordless image of it in my head until it is gone.

the average woman in the UK is actually marginally shorter now due to immigration from parts of the world with smaller stature so it really isn't about people being taller.

Never ever heard this. Evidence link?
In UK the average height for a woman is 5 5". This compares to 5 4" years ago.

A fish supper between four people is a very small portion indeed

WE'd have 2 fish and 1 chips for two of us but if the fish was big I could only manage about 6-8 chips. I do wish they would do small portions of chips.

I dont get up and think about what to have for tea, I get up and stand at the fridge eating white bread and butter while thinking about something else.

Maybe this is the issue? I'd have an oatcake or an apple as a put-off not bread and butter. It just needs a more careful mindset and meal planning,

I also have a portion of fish and chips to myself. I don't have it very often, so no bloody way am I sharing, though I might give Ds2 a bit of my batter.

I'm thin, I just dont find food particularly interesting, and if it is it's only interesting in small amounts. The idea of big plates of food is completely overwhelming and off putting.
In terms of types of foods I'd rather pick than eat a meal and a salad is my ideal, as is a giant plate of prepared fruit. Of course I eat other stuff but it wouldn't be my first choice.
I think I have other thoughts on my mind rather than food so am never really considering the next meal ( meaning I often forget to organise a coherent dinner). Is it a question of what habitually fills thoughts maybe? I don't know but my siblings are very much like me as is my oldest child so maybe theres a genetic predisposition

I lost a lot of weight (12kg) 20 years ago, and have kept it off (pregnancy and breastfeeding excepting). I basically had to retrain my appetite and habits - it got easier after about three years and I no longer had to count calories, but I did have to consciously choose to eat less sometimes.

Then I did 5:2 to get rid of the last few kg of baby weight, and it was a revelation. It’s OK to feel hungry, it passes. Protein (I’d always been a big carbs fan) keeps me fuller. What I’m really craving is not always what I eat, and very often I’d rather wait for something I really want and not have the food that’s on offer.

So my experience is that is possible to change your mindset with a traditional diet. but changing what I actually want and like only happened with 5:2.