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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to give in and get a smart phone?

82 replies

M3lon · 19/10/2019 12:36

I just had to ask my boss to phone me back in the middle of a really difficult conversation because I still use a payasyougo 'dumb' phone and ran out of credit... Blush

I don't have a smart phone, nor does DH or DD, mostly because we fear getting sucked in to 24/7 tech use. That and I don't have an earthly idea how to engage with it all now its all so bloody complicated.

BUT - the other day I couldn't check into a flight before getting to the airport because the only option to do so was via their app....I also couldn't pay a taxi recently because they stopped taking cards in favour of phone transactions....many electric car points require a phone....

Its time to give in isn't it?

OP posts:
TheWorldAsh · 19/10/2019 19:16

@BarbedBloom sensible. Two-factor authentication is always the best choice.

FinallyHere · 19/10/2019 20:28

paying for things with it, how does that work?

Pick a credit or debit card, register it for Apple Pay then use the phone to pay in a service station, supermarket, on the tube in the same way you would use a 'contactless' card. Select the card and present the phones screen as if it were a contactless card.

FinallyHere · 19/10/2019 20:28

Good call to by the handset outright and giffgaff for the contract/SIM card.

bananasandwicheseveryday · 20/10/2019 08:43

My mum, who is 80, has recently made the switch to a smartphone. She's chosen to go with Android purely because everyone in the family uses Android and can therefore help her when she gets stuck (which is happening less a nd less as she becomes accustomed to it). We are basically helping her to download one app at a time, making sure she has a use for them. The public transport app is worth its weight in gold, she loves Whatsapp because she loves getting pictures of her dgc and dggc. She is not surgically attached to her phone at all. It's also great because we've downloaded a bigger keyboard for her - easier to see and use!

Dh and I both chose to buy outright, as few providers Now offer our preferred brand on contract. We have sim only deals which, even taking the cost of the phone into account, are excellent value.

For the poster who asked, no, you don't need a contract as a lot of the payg deals include a data allowance, but generally speaking, some sort of sim only deal is probably better value. We looked at Doro phones for my mum but weren't keen. We went for a regular Android phone - easy to find 'big ' keyboard etc in the playstore and she's very easily and quickly mastered the idea of expanding the touchscreen when she needs to.

Lowlandlucky · 20/10/2019 09:25

My lovely Nokia died and i bought a iphone6s because it is small,i send approx a dozen texts a week, call someone every now and then, dont use SM or apps ( i can turn my own heating on, thanks) and dont have mty bank details on it. It is just another mobile it doesnt have to become a dummy, a blankey or any other kind of comforter

TheWorldAsh · 20/10/2019 09:27

@FinallyHere Yup. One of my favourite features of my Apple Watch is Apple Pay.

If I have to get my card or worse cash out, I feel like I've been transported to the dark ages.

Paying for beer with a flick of the wrist is the future! Grin

soberfabulous · 20/10/2019 09:42

OP do you have children? Grandchildren?

Neither of my party's own mobile phones. They revel in their technical ineptitude.... and I do respect their decision.

BUT they are missing out on so much in terms of connection to us and to their granddaughter.

They've finally decided to look at phones this weekend.

I understand your concerns about it taking over your life but I have limits on all of my apps and keep a really close eye on my usage. I still manage to read 2-3 books a week and don't watch any tv.

As an aside I always wonder how much tv those people who abhor screen time watch...

soberfabulous · 20/10/2019 09:43

That was parents, not parties.

DragonontheWagon · 20/10/2019 09:57

I use my phone for everything, it's rammed with apps and I love the fact if I'm out and need to buy something but don't have my purse, I have my phone so can pay with that.

I need to use my phone at work so it's like a mini iPad in my pocket.

Our shopping list is on our phone too.

I'd never go back and I'm quite capable of controlling my usage of it.

Ginfordinner · 20/10/2019 10:35

How old is your DD @M3lon?

If she is at primary school she doesn't need a smart phone. At secondary school it is very likely that she will. I think more teachers expect students to be able to use their phones to take photos for homework and have access to the school's VLE portal.

In my case DD is at university. Her phone signal is very poor in halls, but we can talk to each other making calls through Messenger.

I must admit that I was late to the smartphone party and social media, but now I find it very useful. I use it. It doesn't use me.

In terms of talking to a real person who won't patronise you I would suggest that you find a shop that sells smartphones and talk to the oldest person there. I have had a very positive experience with Carphone Warehouse in the past, so don't knock it until you try it.

Kiki275 · 20/10/2019 10:54

If you don't want to get stuck in a three year contract like I don't, then get a rolling SIM only contract which means you can switch any time you like. I had one from Tesco for approx £12.50. I then bought a SIM free smart phone. I feel more in control than if I was tied to a £40pm contract x

AutumnRose1 · 20/10/2019 11:12

@soberfabulous "BUT they are missing out on so much in terms of connection to us and to their granddaughter"

Do they live far?

The reason I'm thinking of going back to a dumb phone is that calls and messages are what I need. I got rid of WhatsApp because people just used it to talk shite at me. Or say "here's a load of photos" which I can see when I see them.

MereDintofPandiculation · 20/10/2019 11:41

Probably best to get a smartphone now while there are still alternatives, then you can learn at your own pace.

Ditto on-line banking. Set up a new account which doesn't have a lot of money in it, then you won't feel your main account is at risk.

soberfabulous · 20/10/2019 13:31

AutumnRose1 yes we live overseas. to be honest I don't know anyone with grandchildren who doesn't see it as a huge bonus, wherever they live.

yes, you're right, you could go through someone's photos when you see them, but sharing a pic here and there is a mini connection and update. it wouldn't be the same to sit someone down for the first 5 minutes of any catch up and say "look at my photos.'

AutumnRose1 · 20/10/2019 13:44

sober I suppose they just feel used to doing without. I must be honest, I got annoyed with the constant stream of photos with my goddaughter. She lives quite far away but I just didn't feel the need to see photos so often. She's a teen now so luckily we can just text each other!

Do they use a computer or are they no tech?

In fairness, I say I'd go back to a dumb phone but I have an iPad. I like tech, but not for everything and not on my phone. If they could improve battery power on smartphones, I wouldn't mind so much.

soberfabulous · 20/10/2019 13:53

AutumnRose1 they may have got used to it but I know they would love being more connected, they dote on her and are constantly emailing asking for updates!!!

they have one laptop, which I bought them. i also pay for their wifi in the house.

anyway they've just emailed to say they are actually considering getting phones now, so this is great news!

maddening · 20/10/2019 14:05

I got a windows phone ages before they became the thing, it was an o2 xda and everyone mocked my giant touchscreen 😂😂 it was around 2002!

dayslikethese1 · 20/10/2019 14:26

Wow I thought I was a latecomer (got a smartphone in 2015). How do you cope with no internet bank; do you have to phone the bank up every time you transfer money to a friend or something?

dayslikethese1 · 20/10/2019 14:27

Also why would your daughter be upset if you got a smartphone? Seems a bit odd.

doublebarrellednurse · 20/10/2019 14:28

You seem to think you have no control over how often you pick up your phone. Why is that?

rosegoldwatcher · 20/10/2019 14:48

I categorically do not like smartphones. I was happy for years with my Nokia dumb phone, but my son bought me an unlocked iphone 6 for Christmas (welcome to the 21st Century Mum!) and so I was forced into the change.
I rarely use it, so got a Tesco SIM card and buy £10 credit infrequently. The thing that I dislike the most is the lack of battery life! I needed to charge my old Nokia once every 4 months or so. This thing needs plugging in every day! Angry

AFairlyHardAvocado · 20/10/2019 14:54

OP I would start a new thread asking what phone and tariff deals people have got.

You don't even need to go into a phone shop if it's overwhelming, you can call a couple of providers.

Tell them the phone and tariff you want (saying you know this is possible as someone else has it and you have all the details - thanks to mumsnet) and stick to the price you're comfortable with.

Most phone companies will be so keen to sign up a new customer that they will give you a good deal because you aren't tied in so they need to incentivise you. You can say ok I'll ring xxx as that deal isn't possible with you and they'll likely negotiate further.

Good luck!

RedskyLastNight · 20/10/2019 14:57

How do you cope with no internet bank; do you have to phone the bank up every time

... a smartphone is not the only way to connect to the internet you know ...

My "dumb" phone has just died and I have reluctantly swapped to DD's old phone that she discarded about a year ago. Other than adding a Family Whatsapp group I am still using it as though it were a dumb phone. no reason why you can't do the same OP?

Ginfordinner · 20/10/2019 15:41

I use my laptop for my internet banking

Zeldasmagicwand · 20/10/2019 15:57

I got DH (66yrs) to buy his first proper smartphone about a month ago and he's really taken to using it more than I expected. He wanted to use internet banking but the bank he uses insists on sending a security code to your smartphone when you complete certain types of transaction, so he didn't really have a choice.

I use all Apple products but didn't want him/us to spend a lot of money if he wasn't going to use it so he bought a basic Samsung outright for about €150. He uses Vodafone as their coverage is the best in this area and tops up €20 at a time, when he needs to.

When I lived in the U.K., I bought my Apple phones outright and used giffgaff for a pay-as-you-go service as they were the cheapest at the time.