Not Inviting Sibling to wedding

[HuskySnow]

So bascially long story short, one of my siblings was a complete d* to me a few years back, and screwed over my fiance, never apologised and now we are only civil for families sake at do's. My sibling is in denial and doesn't even know what they did wrong, and I cant be bothered to go into it all with them, for them to just say it didnt happen or just deny it. My fiance really doesn't like my sibling.

We are now planning our wedding and I dont care if they are there or not, it doesn't effect me, obviously my fiance doesn't want them there, so we arent inviting them. But my parents dont understand and think I'm horrible if I dont invite them.

Surely its our wedding and we can invite who we want?

Its really getting me down, and I love all the wedding planning. But they dont understand that just because they are my sibling, that doesn't mean anything to me.

Am I being unreasonable?

We had a destination wedding.
Dhs sibling wasn't invited.
She could have come but told her mother she didn't like me when mil told her we were getting married.
She also owes us a lot of money and so would have had to repay that too, which she hasnt.
It's your wedding, do what you want.

If it doesn’t affect you if they are there or not then maybe just have them there to keep your mum and dad happy

My sister and I never got along and barely could stand each other. Due to age and time, we’re polite to each other and I hope for the best for her. Tbh, I should have eloped, but out of familial obligation I had a wedding for appearances sake. My sister was the most behaved compared to my parents at the time and it took me years to forgive them for it. Thankfully, they had enough decency not to cause a scene in front of my in-laws.

I absolutely agree with you not inviting your sibling, but if your parents are going to have a face at your wedding over it, it’s likely going to put a damper on your day.

I’d suggest you talk to your parents and compromise by saying if they want said sibling there, they pay for the expenses for that sibling to attend and with the promise that they keep them out of you and your fiancé’s sight the whole time. They are completely responsible for that sibling and said sibling should know this as well. If they cannot do that, then sibling unfortunately has fallen ill and can’t make it in fear of infecting others if anyone asks.

Does said sibling even want to be there?

Op are you prepared never to speak to your sibling again?

I know of a family like this. One sibling didn't invite the other two to their wedding. There are still repercussions 25 years later when they've only been in the same room at the same time due to funerals and a dead parent. I couldn't be sure they've actually spoken to each other.

Honestly the repercussions could go on for years