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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be freaked out, Can't imagine images...

167 replies

Slappadabass · 14/10/2019 19:42

So I came across a post on here about aphantasia, not been able to imagine or picture a image in your mind, I can't, but I'd never thought about it and thought it was the norm until now.
I've been trying to picture my DC (amongst other things) in my head, I know what they look like, could give you every little tiny detail about them, but can't imagine their faces, I can't imagine anything.
I don't know how I've not realised people can do it but I can't until now.
AIBU unreasonable to be freaked out? Shock apparently there's a fair few people on here with aphantasia, anyone?

OP posts:
Continentalmama · 14/10/2019 20:45

Did you see this in a thread yesterday? I saw it and started googling and 2 hours later was totally freaked out and texting DH as I had no idea that other people actually see an image when they imagine something! A few things make more sense now, I am dreadful at recognising peoples faces, I always wondered how victims of crime could describe their assailant to a sketch artist to draw and I could never do the visual part in yoga/relaxation techniques and if I want to imagine the layout of a room or something I physically draw it out. Also my childhood memories are me remembering stories that happened, not seeing images, if that makes any sense!

Fink · 14/10/2019 20:47

I have it.

I only realised when I went back to work after mat leave and was going to be expressing milk. Advice on the net was to picture the baby as you express, which helps milk flow. It was only then the penny dropped that all those times other people talked about 'seeing' something in their mind, they actually were able in some way to picture it. I tried telling a couple of mum friends & hv, in the hopes of getting some advice, and was made to feel like I was a substandard mother and clearly didn't really love dd if I couldn't even picture her.

I've got used to it in the years since. It's not a big deal. For years I thought I was just face blind until I found the term aphantasia. As soon as I read about the condition I knew it described me exactly and I wasn't alone.

Basil90 · 14/10/2019 20:49

What do you mean? How can you describe every last detail of a room of you can't imagine it? I don't understand what you mean

Original poster
Slappadabass · 14/10/2019 20:54

I've always thought I dreamt in pictures but I don't know now, maybe I don't.
I can remember what I've had a dream about but I couldn't visualise it so maybe I don't. I don't know.

OP posts:
Original poster
Slappadabass · 14/10/2019 20:55

@fink
Thats awful, I'm really sorry you was made to feel that way!

OP posts:
soontobeanana · 14/10/2019 20:56

I have this - I was nearly 60 before I realised. My defining moment was shopping for a porch for the front of our house. After choosing the front I asked my husband what we would do with the sides. His reply when was 'what sides?!' - the salesman looked at me very strangely and asked how long I'd lived in the house - 30 years!!

GetTheSprinkles · 14/10/2019 21:00

I certainly have this to an extent. Find it really hard to actually envision anything. For example, being told to count sheep when trying to sleep is useless as I really can't! Its not just a black nothingness in my brain but I can only see very hazy/strained images and I have to try very hard to do so. On the other hand, I have a very scientific brain & speak 3/4 languages so something works in there!

Echobelly · 14/10/2019 21:02

It's not that unusual. One of DH's best mates has it - can't visualise anything.

Original poster
Slappadabass · 14/10/2019 21:03

@Basil90

I could tell you the colours of my walls, curtains, pictures I have up, where my TV is etc etc but I can't imagine it in my head.
I can remember my sofa is cream but I can't picture it in my head, I just remember the details of it.

OP posts:
NearlyGranny · 14/10/2019 21:06

I knew this existed because as a teacher, I used to put up an A1 sheet of white paper and invite the children to project their pictures on it in their heads as I read aloud to them. There would be two or three each year who looked blankly at me.

Wonkybanana · 14/10/2019 21:08

I have it. I recognise DP (just as well really) but if he ever went missing I'd be stuffed trying to give the police a description. Tall, glasses, short hair....and that would be me done.

I can't process visual information either. I was amazed to find out how much people can understand just from looking at something. I don't bump into the furniture - as long as things don't move I'm reasonably competent - but it's why I can't drive. I can't interpret everything that's going on. I have to stop and put everything into words, and by the time I've done that everything's moved and I have to start again.

Because it all happens in the brain, unseen, you tend to assume that everyone experiences the world the same as you and it's a shock when you find out they don't.

Cheeringmeup · 14/10/2019 21:09

This is really interesting, I’ve never been aware of this condition. Can I ask those of you who have no visual ‘mind’s eye’, can you draw? Not from life, but from memory?

NaviSprite · 14/10/2019 21:12

I'm on the opposite side as my mind and memory are almost exclusively images but I'm terrible at remembering conversations, names, dates for events etc.

I can recite things I've read, but that's because I can pull back an image of what was written (if that makes sense?).

Upshot is I'm great at finding misplaced things, downside is I'm a social embarrassment because it takes me so long to remember actual important information like names of new people (we moved this year and it's taken me 5 months to properly recall the names of my neighbours who are lovely people) and I'm often repeating things because I don't recall conversations all that well... and birthdays, I'm shite at birthdays...

DH is like you OP and it's always frustrated him - now I know the word for it I'll let him know so he can look it up, thank you for sharing as I'd never heard of aphantasia :D

OrchidInTheSun · 14/10/2019 21:15

I have always thought there is no way I would be able to describe a criminal to the police. I'd be the worst witness. I might get as far as red hair, about 6 foot but that would be about it.

I mean I could pick Greg Rutherford out of a line up but I couldn't describe his face to you.

AloneLonelyLoner · 14/10/2019 21:15

I have aphantasia. I get lost if I leave the house without people. I've even got lost on the way to work if I've not gone in for a few weeks.

My toddler sometimes directs me to the park, but usually I can't go out just with him otherwise we're screwed.

Google maps doesn't help and actually makes it worse.
I can't be left alone in stores or car parks.

I don't think people can understand how actually terrifying it can be.
I try to explain it as that scene I'm Still Alice where she has gone for a run and can't recognise anything.
I think some people have mild forms maybe, but I really have no connection to my space at all.

I wish people would understand. I've found coping mechanisms from childhood which I didn't realise were coping mechanisms until someone queried them.

I got lost in my work once.

OrchidInTheSun · 14/10/2019 21:17

Oddly, I am really good at drawing something that is right in front of me.

Degustibusnonestdisputandem1 · 14/10/2019 21:19

I'm the complete opposite, and have an incredible visual memory... I also have Aspergers... funnily enough I can remember faces vividly but am not always great with names... 😳

ExhaustedGrinch · 14/10/2019 21:19

I have this. Also have a shit memory, can't remember peoples faces to which causes embarrassment, crap with directions and I'm wondering if the fact I'm rubbish at drawing has something to do with this too?

I've just tried my hardest to close my eyes and picture something and my eyes started hurting after a minute because I was straining my eyes to try and see something!

Whatisthisfuckery · 14/10/2019 21:22

@FormalyFrikadela01 I lost my eye sight 6 years ago. It was always very bad but I lost what the little I had. I can’t picture things in my head now. E can’t even bring to mind things I could see before. I can’t even picture what I look like, which might be a good thing I suppose. The other day I asked DP what I look like now. I have no idea how old I look, or whether I have wrinkles, or how grey my hair is going. My hair is going grey in a streak at the front apparently.

I haven’t seen my DS since he was 5. he’s 12 tomorrow and I have no idea what he looks like. He looks like me apparently, whatever that looks like.

I can indeed confirm that it’s a bit shit, and clothes shopping is a nightmare.

LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD · 14/10/2019 21:26

I can’t ‘see’ things but I feel them. So I feel maps and directions, I also feel numbers. I can only see things in a very fuzzy way - like looking at a photo from a distance through a frosted window

Funny considering I went to art school. You’d be thought I would be more visuals.

Dodie66 · 14/10/2019 21:26

Same here. I can’t visualise anything. I didn’t know about this till recently and I’m 68. The rest of my family can all visualise things. I know for instance what a giraffe looks like and I’m an artist and can draw one but can’t see it in my minds eye

Mollpop · 14/10/2019 21:27

I have absolutely no mind's eye. Until recently, I didn't realise that other people did. I thought it was just an expression and it never occurred to me that people could actually visualise things.

LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD · 14/10/2019 21:27

@Whatisthisfuckery - what do you use to ‘read’ Mumsnet? I have tried the iPhone ‘reader’ doodah but it wasn’t brilliant.

beckyvardy · 14/10/2019 21:28

I didn’t realise this was a thing either I didn’t realise people couldn't.

Don't know if it's linked at all but I have very vivid dreams where I can decide on choices in the dream.

HippyChickMama · 14/10/2019 21:31

I have aphantasia I think in words rather than pictures but I also have synaesthesia and am autistic. I've always assumed they are all linked.

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