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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be angry that my husband ate them all?

135 replies

M0nkeybutler · 13/10/2019 20:12

Petty I know, but this has really annoyed me. I had a big bag of crisps in the cupboard that I bought on Friday and have been having a little handful here and there. They are my favourite crisps. Have just come down from the bath and 'd'h has eaten them all. He doesn't see anything wrong with this even though if I did it with something of his he would go mad. Then instead of apologising when he sees it's annoyed me, he comes up with all kind of arguments as to why I'm being u reasonable about it. 'They've been there for ages', 'there weren't that many left', etc etc. It's just not right to take something and have all of it. I wouldn't have minded if he'd had some, happy to share. But to eat them all and not see anything wrong with it?? Aargh!!

OP posts:

EntropyRising · 14/10/2019 07:20

When you live with someone like this, they eat until it's all gone, regardless of the amount. If there is half a bag, they'll eat half a bag. If there are three bags, they'll eat three bags.

If you're living with a compulsive eater, then this is a problem.

Otherwise, it's just food management.

Ledkr · 14/10/2019 07:35

My husband thinks any leftovers are his it drives me and the kids mad. I have to specifically say to him not to eat something which makes me feel like a bossy cow. But he will. Literally polish off anything that is left and don't even start me on cereal. I buy a nice granola or something and whne I go to eat it he's scoffed the bloody lot over a couple of days.

seaweedandmarchingbands · 14/10/2019 07:45

When one member of the household acts with such entitlement and displays a lack of self control over the precious and budgeted for weekly shop it becomes deeply unattractive.

But it doesn’t when it’s one person saying they’re buying these crisps for themselves and nobody else?

NoSauce · 14/10/2019 07:52

When one member of the household acts with such entitlement and displays a lack of self control over the precious and budgeted for weekly shop it becomes deeply unattractive

Not as deeply unattractive as someone being angry at their partner eating the last of a bag of crisps that have been open all weekend, eh?!

dottiedodah · 14/10/2019 08:12

Crisps /Biscuits etc get devoured in no time. Strange as everyone says its "not them" ! Hmmm must be the Borrowers then?

Sparklfairy · 14/10/2019 08:12

I hated this with an ex. I would batch cook something like a spag bol on the weekend, leave it in the fridge. Would be 12-16 portions as would freeze some later. My partner didn't work, I was out of the house 12 hours a day at work. Without fail I would come home the next day and he'd eaten it all. 'but it's just soooo goooood' he'd whine yeah, it is, and now I have no dinner. Thanks

He had a problem though, and he's not the only partner I've had that's greedy, selfish and entitled like this. He'd 'forget' his wallet when we went food shopping and never pay me back his half, then eat 90% of it anyway. Drove me nuts. Anything I wanted I had to buy and eat away from home, because guaranteed he would have eaten the lot and left me with nothing.

Having siblings, I grew up that any food bought was 1/4 mine, give or take. I can't get my head around people that just don't consider others, what it feels like to be looking forward to something and find it all gone. I always leave some of anything, there's no reason to finish the lot.

dottiedodah · 14/10/2019 08:17

Space Dinosaur Bloody Love It!

phoenixrosehere · 14/10/2019 09:24

Not as deeply unattractive as someone being angry at their partner eating the last of a bag of crisps that have been open all weekend, eh?!

How does a day in a half constitute all weekend? 🤔

He could have replaced it once he finished it. And she was annoyed, not angry.

NoSauce · 14/10/2019 09:30

They were opened Friday at some point and he ate the last crisps on Sunday night. That’s all weekend. The OP was annoyed enough to bring it up with him and start a thread about it so imo she was pretty angry about it.

Bluntness100 · 14/10/2019 09:36

Didn't you basically have half each? It is not like you didn't have any and then he ate them before you could. You ate at least half the bag

Ringdonna · 14/10/2019 09:46

You obviously never learnt to share.

lottiegarbanzo · 14/10/2019 10:21

“ Write down each and every 'defense'. Write out, in brief, on large pieces of card. Next time you eat something of his and he gets arsey, retrieve pile of cards. Stand silently in front of him, displaying each card for long enought to read, before dropping to the floor. Repeat.”

Do people really behave like this in relationships??

I've no idea but thought it might be entertaining. When in doubt, go for a bit of performance art. Because, why not?

Aprillygirl · 14/10/2019 10:58

Who eats a handful of crisps at a time? Wouldn't they be be going stale after 2 days? There can't have been that many left if you'd been handfuls here and there anyway. I think your making a fuss about nothing, but if you really don't want to share your crisps don't put them in a communal cupboard.

RebootYourEngine · 14/10/2019 11:09

I am thankful that my DP and I eat different snacks.

DS on the other hand I could quite happily murder or give up for adoption

WhenPushComesToShove · 14/10/2019 11:14

You've got to share. Just buy more 🙄

devonemumof1 · 14/10/2019 11:35

What a thread
Did you buy them out of a joint account? If so they're jointly his, but more importantly it's a bag of crisps, get yourself down to Tesco and pick up another pack! make your DH go if you're really that bothered! I can't imagine every getting so angry about a pack of crisps that can be replaced so easily! Your DH isn't "selfish" or anything like that, he had a snack. Big woop, move along and buy a new pack!

HouseworkAvoider10 · 14/10/2019 11:45

Its better just to hide your own nice treats, if boys and men are living in your house.

Everyone knows that its not possible to fill teenage boys really - they will just eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat until everything edible in the house is gone.
some men are the same - they just eat non stop and can never be filled.

hide your nice stuff.

noenergy · 14/10/2019 11:57

Those of you saying you wouldn't be bothered with it probably don't have members of your family who scoff everything without giving you a chance to eat a snack.

I'm lucky that DH doesn't eat snacks/junk but if he did scoff the lot I think I would huff about it!!

GummyGoddess · 14/10/2019 13:43

DH and I have our own cupboards for snacks. We both grew up in houses where everything was fair game and nothing was yours so you had to scoff it quickly or not have any. Serious weight problems for us until our twenties when we moved in together and had our own little cupboards all to ourselves!

If DH ate my snacks I wouldn't be cross because I know he would go and buy some more for me to make up for eating them. If he just ate all my snacks without replacing them I would be upset and resort to secret eating like some on this thread.

PanamaPattie · 14/10/2019 14:26

I don't think I'm selfish. If I buy my favourite crisps and DH buys his favourite chocolate, I don't eat his treat and he won't he mine without asking if it's ok first. Manners? No?

MerryDeath · 14/10/2019 14:41

eh wouldn't be a big deal in my house. i probably do this to him more than he does it to me and he takes it well.

EKGEMS · 15/10/2019 01:55

"Those big bags are meant to be shared" OH really? So what did you do read that as the 11th commandment or something-thou shall not eat a big bag of chips alone?

Bluntness100 · 15/10/2019 08:38

But they were shared, she'd had at least half of them. She'd had her share.

PippiDeLena · 15/10/2019 09:41

My DSis had an ex like this. He'd compulsively eat anything he could get his hands on: the kid's selection boxes, he'd eat 6 weetabix at a time, or an entire pack of 4 pot noodles in one night. My DSis would make the kid's lunches at night, then come down in the morning and he'd taken the yoghurt and chocolate out and eaten them, so all the kids had was sandwiches. It's repulsive behaviour.

honeylulu · 15/10/2019 10:20

^
My dad was like this, eating all the packed lunch stuff including individually boxed juices, despite there being large cartons of the exact same juice in the fridge. Most annoyingly for my mum he didn't tell her he'd done it so she'd be in a panic in the morning trying to sort packed lunches, get ready for work herself and need to go running to the shop.

His attitude was "its my house, I'll do what I like". Though if mum asked him what extras he wanted her to buy with the shopping he would say nothing as its not healthy to eat between meals. He must have thought pilfered food had no calories!

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