To think my working hours are none of my colleagues business?

[tequilasunrises]

I’m desperate to tell one of my colleagues to piss off but DH says I should just get over it.

She is DESPERATE be seen as the one that works the hardest and constantly comments on what time everyone else comes in/leaves. We work flexi and she’s normally in before me (I have a longer commute) but if I get in first she makes some dramatic excuse about why she’s ‘so late’. Bearing in mind this is normally about 7:30am I normally just ‘hmm’ but it’s so annoying!

I normally do about 30 mins beyond my set hours a day, as I have commitments in the evenings but when I pack up she comments on how nice it must be to leave early all the time. I work more than my bloody hours!!

She gets really arsey when people come in later than 9 and a sarky ‘good afternoon’ is usually employed.

We are busy, but there is rarely anything urgent that can’t be spread over a few days but she just can’t bare not to be the last one out so she stays late into the evenings just faffing and moaning about how busy she is.

Would I be completely unreasonable to turn around and tell her to keep her nose out of my business next time she comments?

(Stories about how other people deal with keener colleagues would also be appreciated)

@MeadowHay it’s not low paid, id say about average! We are civil service. Thats sounds annoying too!

You HAVE to tell her. I work flexi and choose to start at 8:30 am. I work through lunch just eating at my desk, and leave 4pm on the dot. Most of my colleagues leave at 5:30 as they get in later and some choose to go at 6:30 because they have a 2 hr lunch.

About a year ago someone called me a 'part-timer', I replied along the lines of telling her I work the exact same hours as they do, and prefer to be at home with my family earlier because I work to live, not the other way round.

“Gosh l, you must be dreadful inefficient if you have to work long hours. Everyone else seems to manage within their contracted hours”

I’d go with this .

Just be factual with her and say I'm not leaving early I've done my hours. Did you get in at 9? In that case you could leave at 5?.. if she then starts with oh but I've got so much on suggest she maybe talk to the manager about being overloaded and leave it at that.

At least then she can't put a complaint in for you being arsey at the same time you've nipped it in the bud by addressing her bluntly.

Some people have such low self esteem they feel the need to be seen to be working hard. In many businesses it is seen as a sign of inefficiency as a PP said. Not a great attribute at all.

I completely agree that you need a short snippy comment to shut her down. How about in the morning you jump in first with a ‘been here all night again Tracey?’ Big smile on your face and crack on with your work.

I'd definitely be suggesting that maybe she needs to attend a time management course if she's struggling to get her work done within her hours.

Or ask if she needs a hand with her workload.

in some countries like germany and Scandinavia it would be seen as inefficient or a training concern or an overloading concern if you could not complete the work in the hours but also they don't really have a culture of presenteeism where it is acceptable to have long coffee breaks check twitter facebook or MN in work time
personally I would just rather work properly for 7 hours 9-5 with an hours lunch and work flat out 9-1 and then 2-5 than 8-6 with numerous short breaks and checking phone stuff etc

Worked with someone like that. She didn't comment on others but went on and on and on some more about her long hours. She forgot about the fact that she usually went missing for hours during the day, on personal business, so on balance, she was probably working the same number of hours as others.
I found it easier to just ignore that to be bothered saying anything.

Does anyone pick her up on her sarky comments about those who come in after 9? Honestly I would either ignore her completely or say something sarcastic about the fact that she has time to notice everyone else's arrival and departure times.

when I pack up she comments on how nice it must be to leave early all the time

'I'm on a flexi time contract Helen. I do my core hours and then I am FLEXIBLE around them. Quite a few people here are on the same contract. It's literally the reason I took the job.'

I first came across presenteeism in New York in the 1980's - never been aware of it in Europe, but it was a ridiculously established thing then. Nobody did much actual work , but had to be observed by management to be at their desk non-stop, 8.00am to 9.00 pm, day in day out, desk lunch and dinner. Crazy.

We had someone like this. Whenever she piped up I would say ‘well some of us have more to live for than work’ and skip out the door. The first time I said she just sat there doing goldfish impressions!

I had this from a colleague a lot older and more senior than me ( though not my manager )
"Oh, is that you leaving early again?"
"Yes, it's called being efficient"
Never said another word on the matter.
Do not explain yourself or feel you should.
People like this are dicks.

I had a colleague like this. Most people in my office work 9-5, some on different contracts work different but that was the time we could be expected to be in. Several times she and I would arrive at the door to the building at the same time around 8.55 and she would make some comment to the effect of 'Oh look at us, both arriving late!' It drove me nuts. 8.55 isn't late, and even if it was like 9.01 it's not the type of place where anyone notices or cares if you arrive a minute late.

@tequilasunrises YANBU obviously.

I have experienced this kind of person quite a few times in my worklife!

I used to have a manager who would comment EVERY TIME I got up to leave for the day. We had flexi time, and could do our hours anytime between 7.45am and 6.15pm. (We had to do 7.5 hours, with a half hour, 45 minute, or one hour lunch.)

So I would usually do 8am til 4.pm and then dash off as it was the end of my work day, and I had things to do (being a working mother and all!)

At every available opportunity, my manager would say 'SOMEone is in a rush' or 'where's the fire?' Or he would say 'hey you lot, an impression of Lavendar,' and he would shoot out of the office, and people would laugh. Really fucking pissed me off.

Most of them would come in for 9 to quarter past and leave at 5 to half past five. OR they would do 8 til 6 for 4 days, and then finish at lunchtime on the Friday. The comments from the smug cunt of a manager really pissed me off so much.

When I challenged him on it, he said 'I just love to make you squirm, and see you go red.' I said 'I am doing my hours you know!' He said 'yeah but I love to see you go red! Your neck and everything goes flame red, it's hilarious. You're so easy to wind up.'

He didn't stop.

Cunt.

Even when I had a quiet 'unofficial' word with someone in HR, I was told to not raise a complaint about something so trivial, as it would make me look like a silly child.'

I was glad to leave that job! I put up with his cunty comments for 3 years.'

@regmover

Or you could say something like "I don't know why you comment on my hours at least twice a day, but it's starting to feel like workplace bullying so please stop."

I would say this. ^

But add onto it 'if you don't stop, I will report you to HR.'

My Manager problem was some 2 decades ago (1999 to 2001 ish.) At the time, as I said earlier, I was dismissed when I mentioned it to HR, and told to stop being silly. I don't think my complaints would be dismissed these days, and he would have been told to stop.

I have no idea why people say this (as there does seem to be one in every workplace,) but it's fucking annoying. Are they jealous? Are they threatened? Are they just fucking goady? I don't know why they do it.

Maybe someone who DOES say this kind of thing can enlighten us all???

Ignore the comments each and every time.

You don’t need to apologise or explain or make any noises about it at all.

Just ignore.

30 minutes a day extra, times 250 working days a year, means you spend fifteen and a half working days a year doing your job for free. That seems silly.

If you’re civil service you could point her in the direction of some of the effective time management courses on CSL.

They’re crap, but if you if you’re able to suggest it in such a way that seems like you’re trying to be helpful, it might get her thinking

Just seen that you are civil servants. In which case my suggestion to tell her it's workplace bullying is a really good way to go. And if she carries on go to HR and raise a complaint.

Are you working for free or accruing extra time/money?

Or ask her if she'd like you to have a chat with her manager about getting someone to help her with her workload as she doesn't seem to be coping. That should shut her up

@LavendarGreen yes I’d LOVE to hear from someone who feels the need to do this!!

@VincentVanGoughandhisear it’s not for free, we clock in and out so I can take the day off when I accrue enough time. I like the system, but some people to have an obsession with accruing shit loads of hours even when there’s no real urgent work to be done.

I can’t agree with those saying ignore it. It’ll go on and on forever if you don’t address it, and it’s a form of dominance behaviour. You choose how to respond. You could be breezy and make light of it if that’s your style, or maybe even take the piss “Noooo the clockwatcher strikes again! Quick everybody let’s see for who can be seen at their desk longest! I’m working in sllooooooow mooootiiooooon.” Or make a sarcastic comment back everytime, or threaten to report to HR as bullying. Personally I am pretty blunt and meet attempts to dominate head on. If she said “good afternoon” to me I’d reply something like “Oh wow do you realise that’s the sixth time today you’ve criticised a colleague’s hours? What’s that about? Don’t you approve of with flexible working?” Then when she next does it “Really? Commenting on colleagues AGAIN?? Wow.”

"Have you got problems at home? You always seem to be here til late, is there anything i can help with?" Lets her know you've noticed she stays late and that if she does have conerns it is ok to mention them. You never know...

One job I had the admin team used to get there and have to do 9-5, but me [special me] had a specific role which often meant early starts and so i'd use that to get in for 8 when i had to go out to visit schools etc, and build up the hours so i could slope off at 3 or 4 if I ever had a day in the office.

The admin team virtually simmered with fury at me being allowed to do it. Someone asked once, and I said I would be happy to send over my log of all the hours Id worked for their perusal and that I usually equal it up at the end of each week where I can which is why I HAVE to leave early so I don't build up TOIL.