To wonder if this was a lot of responsibility for a child?

[AintNobodyHereButUsChickens]

I went to a very small primary school in small, very quiet village, we had 50 pupils, 3 classrooms (but only 2 were used as not enough kids) and no hall. Because we had no hall, assemblies, wet playtimes/lunchtimes, indoor PE, school parties etc were all done in the church over the road. When I got to yr5 (so 9/10) I and another girl who was a year younger than me(!!) were appointed church monitors. This meant that every morning we would go to the headteachers office, take the church vestry key, leave school grounds, go over the road, unlock the vestry door then go through the church and unlock the main door ready for assembly. On the odd occasion one of us was off school poorly, we'd simply do it alone instead of taking someone else with us. We had no supervision at all during this, we didn't even see the HT when we collected the key as it hung on a hook outside her office door! We'd be in class for the register then be like "Ok Miss we've got to go and unlock the church now" and that's it.

It was great at the time and we felt so grown up having this responsibility but I think I'd be horrified if my daughter was given a job like this to do. I'm only 28 now so it wasn't really that long ago!

Sounds fine to me. I'm your age. You say it was a small rural village so presume the road was quiet

It was a different time, with different values.

When I was growing up in New Zealand, I was a School Patrol (I was 9 at the time). Every day I and the other girl on the roster would get to school early, get the lollipops out of the store room, put on our bright yellow sashes and walk half a mile to the main road, whereupon we morphed into lollipop ladies. Then we left school a bit early and did the afternoon shift.

I can't imagine that happening now.

Why did the job fall to girls? It was it a girl’s school?

My DS is in yr 5 now and I wouldn't have a problem with him being asked to do an activity like this. Bit of responsibility is good for them, gives them independence and confidence. Obviously these days we have more awareness of H&S so I wouldn't expect a child to be sent alone. That said, we also live in a village and many of his classmates walk to school on their own now.

Re my previous post, I have just looked up School Patrols in New Zealand. They are still going, but now have to have a supervising adult.

When we did it supervising adults were nowhere to be seen.

Why did the job fall to girls? It was it a girl’s school?

No, it was a mixed primary school but we were always paired with someone of the same sex.

At 9 almost 10 my dd was walking home from school and unlocking her own front door and staying home alone for 40 minutes.
You sound very overprotective if opening a Church would be an issue for your dd.

That sounds totally ok to me, and I'm a safeguarding obsessive.

It wasnt luck though Juells was it - the children had been taught how to act around strangers and responded appropriately. Or do you really think no 8/910/11 year old should ever be out of an adults sight, ever?

Imagining it was a quiet road given the location. At 9/10 a child is definitely capable of crossing a quiet road without adult assistance and unlocking a door. I can’t really see an issue with this at all. Some of the children in my DS’s class (year 5) walk to and from school alone.

I'd assume a neurotypical 8/9/10 year old can cross a street and can unlock a door. Which of these do you feel is too much? And at what age should a child be able to cross a street and unlock a door according to you?

Sounds fine to me. We used to get sent to the shop to buy cakes for the teachers and sweets with the change , it was brilliant!

At harvest festival time, we used to go around the village in pairs and give out the food to "the needy". That was lovely and got the message through a lot better than just bringing a tin of peaches to school would.

Bowerbird5 at my children's school the year five and six students answer the phones and work at the reception desk - if there's a problem they can't solve they go and fetch an adult. They also help in the dinner hall, do large chunks of the assemblies and do a mentor scheme with the younger children. They all appear very confident and competent at a young age. It is one of the reasons that I chose the school - and it's just a normal city primary.

It seems fine to me.

I would like to take issue with the poster who said that not being given responsibility can lead to snowflakes with mental ishoos. Mental ill health has been with us for millennia. It affects rich and poor alike in every society on earth. The fact that in some poorer societies it won’t ever be diagnosed or treated, or will necessarily be seen as less important that physical survival doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. I doubt very much that there is any correlation between levels of ‘cosseting’ versus responsibility and subsequent mental health problems.

I wouldn’t have an issue with my ten year old doing this.

That sounds brilliant, beeftomato.

I guess I would be horrified if my DD did stuff like this because she can't help herself from messing about and she has no road sense at all, she'll merrily skip/dance/twirl around right next to the edge of the pavement on a busy road. On several occasions I've had to yank her back from the curb or stop her from walking into a lamp post because she stares behind her while still walking forwards She knows how to cross a road but she can't seem to get it in her head that pratting about how she does is really not a great idea.

Because you haven't made her walk sensibly on the inside side of the pavement, my dd is 4 and doesn't dance and twirl in the street. It starts early from when they first start walking, then you give them a bit more freedom but the moment they are too close to the edge, run too far ahead, they hold your hand for the remainder of the walk.

And tbh I've let my ds walk into a lamppost because that's the quickest way to learn

Sounds fine to me and I expect they deliberately chose children who wouldn't mess about or behave dangerously

this isn't you being made to do to much it's about you not teaching your daughter enough.

Twirling near a road isn't just ditsy pratting around it's pure stupid and as the adult id be forcing her to hold my hand and walk calmly facing the right way before she gets herself hit.

Don't blame your Absolutely fine experience for inadequate parenting, you were clearly taught better so pass it on

As soon as I read your update op I had a feeling your dd's behaviour was going to be picked up and criticised!

I think the amount of responsibility you had was brilliant. Cbeebies does little stories about children from around the world. It's a real eye opener! Your popping across the road with keys doesn't compare to what some children do and achieve at such a young age.

So how many children doing that over the years were killed or injured or seriously traumatised by this?

If, as I expect, the answer is none, then I think you have your answer.

Let’s not forget how privileged we are to be able to have this discussion; in a lot of the world, children that age are working in brick kilns and suchlike.