to ask for more?

[Ludos]

DH has offered £400 per month as maintenance for 2 DC.

He is self employed with fluctuating income. No point going through CMS as they won't see his full earnings. He usually earns between £500 and £800 a week. Sometimes up to £1000.

I feel like this isn't enough, would it be unreasonable of me to ask for more?

You'll get a mixed response on here - I believe that is well over what the CMS recommends therefore you should accept it

Why do you want more? It doesn't cost £400 to raise two children unless it's for paying for childcare? Do you work? Who will be paying the mortgage etc?

If he earns says £800 per week that £3200 per month before tax. £400 is a significant chunk of that and he'll obviously need to be paying his own mortgage/bills on a home where 2 children can come and stay.

For 2 DC it should be 20% of his average pay. Sounds like he’s offering 20% of his lowest pay.

How often will they stay with their dad?

Why do you want more? It doesn't cost £400 to raise two children unless it's for paying for childcare?

It's £100 per month just for school dinners. There will be childcare.

It will also depend on how often he has them overnight? Quick check on the CMS calculator based on £800 per week earnings (since OP says sometimes more sometimes less) and him having them 1-2 nights per week the suggestion is £475 a month so his offer is about right

Atalune - I'm not sure at the moment. Its unlikely they will stay over for a while, but at most 1 x fortnight.

I actually think £400 is a good amount

Yes he could offer more, but he could also be insulted and refuse and drop it to less...

Like you said, no point going through CMS as it would be a lot less

Have a look at the CMS calculator for a rough average what they would suggest then work from there.

You are right to acknowledge going through them being pointless though - if he's self employed they'll be absolutely hopeless.

Unfortunately their sum doesn't take into account expenses, only his income.

Ok - we will cut back to manage. Thank you for the replies

How is £100pw from £800pw earnings right?

I'd think he should be paying more.

You could ask him to up it a bit, say by another £100 per month. Is he likely to be generous in other ways, eg buying school uniforms, paying for trips, etc?

Rachelover60 he wont pay for anything on top

Going on £800 a week income the CMS calculator would show £544.24 a month for less than 1 night a week overnights or £514.61 for 1/2 nights a week overnight.

So that would be your start negotiation point.

I would get him to agree that on top of that he buys school uniform or something like that.

Cross post

£100 per week school lunches
£160 termly for after school activities
£100 per month hobbies

These are fixed costs - obviously clothing / equipment for hobbies etc on top.
Both DC have upcoming residentials - £300 in total for those, luckily this cheaper than last year when both came in at £750!!

I am hopeful that I will be able to maintain everything as I dont want them to miss out because we have separated.

Also things like scout camp etc, often 2 x per year

School Transport is another - £100 per month.

I havent actually written it all down before and now I am worried about how to keep up with everything!

What on Earth are your kids having for lunch that costs £50 each per week??

Sorry - typo!! Per month!

@LoonyLunaLoo it's a typo. Op means per month.

Yes work out a budget and present this to him rather than just saying we need more. Hopefully he’ll be reasonable.

@lyralalala interesting, I'd agree.

£400 is £6.50 each a day. Doesn't seem enough.

Unless in full time child care that’s plenty.

His £400, your £400 matched payment plus child benefit is just under a £1000 a month. That’s more than enough to cloth, food and hobbies for two children.

If op ears less (which women often do due to taking time off to have children) I think she should not have to contribute the same. So those saying £800 is plenty it probably is but maybe op can't afford 400 in top of housing her children.