To consider anti-depressants for my 16 year old?

[Mumofboth]

Just that really. She’s had a lot of crap to deal with and is really struggling. We’ve referred her for CBT but the waiting list is long and I can’t afford to go private. She’s regularly suicidal although she also has good days where she feels she can cope. This makes me wonder if she has a hormone imbalance. From my understanding, the tablets make you “numb” almost and therefore unable to feel extreme emotions, this equally terrifies me and sounds like it might be good for her. I hate the idea of medication but I also hate the constant worry that one day it won’t just be suicidal THOUGHTS. She’s my world and I hate to see the sadness in her eyes. Any advice appreciated.

She's 16. It's not your decision.

And in any case, there is a heightened risk of self harm in the first stages of taking antidepressants. Sometimes because feeling numb is so awful that people don't feel better, but want to feel something, sometimes because it gives them the energy to do something about their thoughts.

Support, don't 'decide'.

Don't wait. Get her to the Gp for a prescription. They don't all make you feel numb. (the anti anxiety xanax can though).

Dd1 went on to Sertraline aged 17. I wish we had taken her earlier. The first month was very hard but since then she has been much better.

Would you question her taking medication for a physical issue...?

DS was on anti-depressants at 17. The first ones were awful but they were changed within 2 weeks to Sertraline which he's been on for 3 years now. Whilst he still has suicidal thoughts now and then he doesn't have the impulse to act on them. There is a degree of trial and error to find the right medication and don't be afraid to ask for changes.

It's scary times but, if she's willing, go with her to the GP and be her advocate. They need to hear what it's like at it's worst which is difficult to verbalise for some.

It's not your decision.

Had she been referred to camhs for assessment?

How did you arrange a CBT referral without an assessment and a discussion on diagnostic criteria and medication and psychological therapies?

Your understanding of antidepressants is incorrect.

I was finally diagnosed with anxiety and depression aged 36 and started sertraline. It changed my life and I wish I had realised sooner.
My experience is that the meds put me in a position to engage well with CBT and counselling. They are longer term solutions and if she is suicidal she needs an immediate intervention before a long term approach is considered IMO. The GP will advise if there are risks in the early days and how to safeguard. I had issues around wanting to sleep all the time for the first couple of weeks but that's all

Ugh I remember being that age and half my friends being depressed. They were resistant to the idea of taking medication to help, but in hindsight I think it may have helped. Nobody did kill themselves but it was talked about a lot and there was self harm. It doesn't have to be forever but that age your brain does strange things and I think some people just need a little help. CBT is preferable but DD might not be able to wait that long. Make sure DD understands even they arent an instant fix and to come to you if shes really struggling

At what point did I say it was MY decision?! I’m trying to help and advise my teenager and since I’m unsure of the best advice to give I thought I’d ask for opinions. I am SUPPORTING, hence why I am trying to help.
We’ve seen our GP and on her advice, we self-referred for Mental Health Services. I say WE because my DD has asked me to do it all with her.
@whatthehek yes I would, I question every single thing that enters my children’s bodies.
@Gatehouse77 thank you, that’s helpful. Sorry your son is going through it.
@Scatterbrainbox this is exactly what I’m getting at. Would anti-depressants be a good short term option while we wait for therapy? Thank you, maybe I’ll take her back tomorrow.

How did you arrange a CBT referral without an assessment and a discussion on diagnostic criteria and medication and psychological therapies?

In my area anyone over the age of 16 can self-refer for CBT via the IAPT programme.

@TheGoogleMum thank you for understanding. I’m scared and I don’t want to wait and it be too late.

I started antidepressants at 14, the dr didn’t even consult my mum before prescribing them which I now wonder about but I’d not be here if it wasn’t for them!
I went through about 3 different kinds but once I settled I felt all the better, not numb at all but slightly more able to deal with each day!
The thoughts don’t leave but the urges tend to dwindle.

She needs to talk to her GP. She's 16, so the decision will be made between her and her doctor.

FWIW my DD has been on antidepressants since she was 17 and they have been somewhat helpful without making her feel flat or numb. She's been on them for about 6 months now and her psychiatrist is talking about reducing the dose after Christmas.

For unbiased factual info on common mental health medications the Mind website is really helpful. Take a look at their factsheet on antidepressants

www.mind.org.uk/information-support/drugs-and-treatments/antidepressants/#.XZm5PpDTU0M

Also, the children and young people's mental health charity Young Minds have a Parents Helpline. Several of the Parents I work with have used it and found them very helpful. They can't tell you what to do but sometimes it just helps to talk things through with someone who understands.

@Mumofboth

Navigating the mental health services with an 'almost' adult is difficult at times so keeping the communication between you and your DD is so important. Which is not to say there won't be moments of high tension, things said wrongly, trying an approach which has worked but not this time, etc.

DS has always been very open and honest about his struggles but there have been occasions when DH and I have spent time working out if we're looking at normal teenage behaviour vs potentially something more serious. DH also has mental health issues and we've laws been open with the kids about it so it's not a taboo subjecting they've seen the effects first hand.

Communication between DH and I is also paramount.
Personally, I've found with DH and DS being direct is much simpler. If I can see they're struggling I will ask if they're having suicidal thoughts. I found that if I tried to be more subtle or avoid using certain words it gave them a get-out (they can both be very literal and, sometimes, when it suits them!).

Also, I've found with DS that he needs a lot of reassurance that these times will pass and he will get through it with support.

Has she also had a full blood test? My DD very similar but had a Vit D deficiency, she was put on a mega dose. Obviously it didn't make every thing right, but it did help enormously. Might be worth a try alongside ADs. I really feel for you, it's such a worry

I'm a mental health nurse.

Antidepressants are not generally the first line treatment for teens as the side effects tend to be more severe. In particular may teens on them have found an increase in their suicidal or self harm thoughts, occasionally leadi ng to the inevitable tragedy.

The NICE guidelines therefore are that CBT is the frontline treatment for teenagers.

Also, and this id's my own lov, I'd be reluctant to medicalise depression in teenagers.

Thank you all. I’d rather do anything else before medicating her. I’ll see how it goes after the IAPT appointment. I’ll keep talking to her and I think the direct approach as you have suggested @Gatehouse77. I’ll look at the websites suggested to, it’s so hard to advise on something that I have really limited knowledge on so I guess I need to educate myself more.
@Wonderland18 we all need to survive. I’m glad you found something that works for you, I hope my daughter does too.

@Spidey66 that’s really useful to hear from a professional what you would do in a personal situation. Thanks.

I can only talk about my own experience. I am on Sertraline and have found it life changing since PND.

I’m definitely not numb - I’m just not miserable.

What does she do apart from school? I know it’s hard but physical activity helps mind and body and can be part of the jigsaw. Is there something triggering this or is is chemical?

the tablets make you “numb” almost and therefore unable to feel extreme emotions

This is not my experience at all. When I was on antidepressants (Citalopram, two lots of about 3 years with a 2 year break, currently on another break of over a year), I found that they just made me feel like myself again. They gave me the resilience to go to counselling and deal with some stuff, and they enabled me to get up in the morning and do things. There are different kinds of drugs and different people respond differently to them.

If your GP recommends that she consider them, then she should.

Some really unhelpful posts on here. @quincejamplease I'm not sure what the point of your contribution was but maybe you're having a bad day and it helps to lash out.

OP good on you for trying to help your child. The waiting list for CAMHS can be so long so I'd go to the GP in the meantime.

The first few weeks of taking them can be hideous, but hang on in there.

Good luck x

She's 16 . You cannot decide for her. Also as somebody who has had anti depressants in the past . I don't recommend them. They fucked me up even further.

I’ll look at the websites suggested to, it’s so hard to advise on something that I have really limited knowledge on so I guess I need to educate myself more.

It's her doctor that needs to advise her.

At 16 she is capable of giving consent to medical treatment without adult involvement, and you definitely shouldn't be discouraging her from taking medical advice.

GPs will not initiate antidepressants for under 18's, it needs to be done via CAMHS. Once stable they will take over prescribing. As per PP psychological therapies are first line for teens.