It's that time of year again off to Rutshire

[Slaymill]

I want to have a bubble bath then liberally douse myself in L'Eau d'Issey. Then wander downstairs to the cottage lounge to sit in front of a fire of apple logs, wearing only a dark blue towel.

I want swishy hair and rosy cheeks from country walks with the dogs so the local village widower/reformed seducer/newbie falls madly in love with me.

I want to drink Moet from tooth mugs or ancient heirloom crockery.

I want my new love to take me to their achingly rich family who are super friendly and have houses all over the world.

I want to live in Rutshire.

AIBU?

penisbeakers

Your terribleness is your best feature! Get that filth published, forthwith!

No no no no no it would be a dreadful idea

Too many heaving bosoms and filthy sweat beaded male torsos..

Thank you for the Rutshire updates! Love them. My teenage years were consumed by Jilly and I named my dogs over the years Rupert, Billy and Tabitha! I do however now wish I could get down to 10st (her idea of huge) but am not prepared to endure heartbreak and a grapefruit only diet...

@Inspiralcarpetry it's not all grapefruit and misery! You're still allowed Moet and vodka and the odd kitkat as long as it's shared with a pony. Got a ballgown to fit into for Fri so I should know!

None of Taggie's amazing cooking for you then!
Oh for a ball to go to, with Seb, Dommie, Luke and Red. Any of them would do, haha!

@Inspiralcarpetry I love "Polo"- it's one of my favourites. I always fancied Red's favourite pudding but I have a dress to fit! Would def take Luke to the ball... and the twins. Our dance cards have arrived & I'm getting excited!!

Isn't Rutshire quite poor?

OMG I MISUNDERSTOOD SO BADLY. Ignore me

If anyone's books are falling apart from re-reading, like mine, I just got an email from Amazon to say Jump! is on sale on Kindle for 99p until the end of the month. Even though I can't quite forgive her for what she did to Billy at the end of that one (first time I have ever cried reading a novel).

I ended up nearly causing Perdita-like chaos in the village yesterday moving my three horses between fields. The plan was to put headcollars on all of them and then leave the two oldies in the field together while I took the stroppy 10-y-o to the new field and then go back for the other two. Headcollars on, opened the gate to take the 10-y-o out and the other two (who are 24 and 20 and should know better!) galloped through it from a standing start and shot off. 10-y-o started bouncing, screaming and generally turning himself inside out on the end of the leadrope but thankfully remembered his manners enough to stay with me rather than taking off after them, and we eventually caught up with them grazing on the verge about 100 yards past the field I was moving them to, under the concerned eye of one of my neighbours with a Cooper-esque pack of dogs at his feet. Fortunately our village is only 26 houses, one road and fenced in on all sides, so they couldn't have got out onto the main road, but there is obviously life in the elderlies yet!

Every month or the year is Rutshire month.

I want to be heart breakingly beautiful and/or marry Lysander Hawkley.

My first child will be named Lysander (if a boy). I'll pretend it's inspired by Shakespeare.

Why doesn't everywhere outdoors smell of wild garlic ???!!!

10 stone is fine if you're 5'6" or more!

My Suffolk hamlet (not officially big enough to be a village) was 11 dwellings, a church and a collection of picturesque signposts. We lived at at corner where three farms met in a converted farm workers' cottage. If three cars coincided we piled out to look at the traffic jam. The local hunt gathered in front of our cottage every Boxing Day; snooty people on towering horses ignoring our existence, though the MFH had the next door farm and was lovely, especially when one of his workers ploughed up our water pipe. He personally delivered water to our door in an old milkchurn until we were reconnected. Our DC had the run of three stubble fields in Autumn and a stream and a wood year-round. I used to summon them from the front doorstep with an old Met police whistle.

We had to move when they hit their teens because their burgeoning social lives meant we were forever in the car ferrying them about.

I miss the pea viners passing under the bedroom window at 2am when Mr Birdseye said "Yes!"

Have to thank you for this thread OP!

On the back of it I bought riders on Kindle.and have now got up 2 hours early to watch the tv adaptation on you tube before going to work.

I've started rivals but disappointed by the lack of horsey action...which is the next horse based one in the series?

Ah my people! Love this Jilly time of year. I love the idea of a Jilly book club - none of my friends are remotely into horses or posh romps and no good for endless discussion of which hero is best or whose house you'd prefer to live in (The Priory for me, despite the dodgy electrics) while getting tight. I need some Jilly friends!

I lent my millennial collegue the old short stories (which I loved as old !) and she was horrified !! Riders will always have a place in
My heart . Reminds me of travelling to France aged 13 eyes 👀 agog reading it

I got all my sex education from Jilly and Shirley Conran

I got all my sex education from Jilly and Shirley Conran

Yes. And Jackie Collins of course!

I cannot believe I have never ventured into the world of Rutshire and the fabulous JC. On the strength of this thread, I have just ordered my very first Jilly. I went with Rivals as that was mooted as a good autumn read upthread. It's arriving this evening. I cannot wait!

I've always liked the sound ofJC books and god knows, I have high pretensions & aspirations towards the champagne-soaked hedonistic lifestyle that combines village life with London. I live in a village, own a gun dog, stacks of real heirloom crockery, have blonde hair that rarely has contact with a hairbrush, bloody love a good hearty meal after long walks across the fields, married to a super-posh man & have a sitting room (not a lounge ) but did have a drawing room in our last house...clearly I have to move again to remedy this. I didn't grow up with any of this. I just read lots of books as a child & teen that described that life, met lots of people at uni who came from that lifestyle, lost myself in posh dramas & Radio 4 and thought to myself: I'll have a bit of that when I'm an adult. So I did!

@Iremembertheelderlykoreanlady Polo, which is also the next one chronologically. Rivals is amazing though!

@CallMeMousie I've always fancied the Priory the most, too! Although your user name suggests you live at Greenlawns/The Bottoms? Am I allowed to join the Mousie Club?

wattytanker
Yes Her too !

Kids
Today are missing out I tell ya

I lent my millennial collegue the old short stories (which I loved as old !) and she was horrified !!

That generation does have a tendency to be horrified by a lot of innocuous things. She’s missing out! Those stories are adamantly unfeminist - gorgeous bosomy girls, relentlessly macho guys - but they’re just stories, and written at a time (perhaps in reaction to?) when proper feminism was massively on the march. And god they’re so fun!

Riders will always have a place in
My heart . Reminds me of travelling to France aged 13 eyes 👀 agog reading it

Haha me too - I backpacked through Europe with a copy of Riders and it was absolutely falling apart by the time I got home!

@MrsToothyBitch I only allow very special friends to become members of the Mousie Club . But as you've bought so many charming ge-owns from my boutique I consider you a very special friend indeed.

Yes Green Lawns is indeed lovely, now we have ripped out all that nasty old oak panelling and filled the garden with petunias. The Priory looks horribly draughty of course but with some nice chintz curtains and modern furniture Ay'm sure Ay could make it a very cosy home.

@CallMeMousie ay especially enjoy may ginger tweed shooting suit from your autumn range. Ay wish ay'd also got the matching deer stalker but alas it sold out so fast- laike hot gateaux!

His monocle fell out, and his mouth opened and shut several times.

(I’m re-reading Lisa & co, and loving it.)