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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To consider euthanizing my dog

81 replies

Episcomama · 04/10/2019 16:16

I think we need to euthanize our black lab and I need to hear from others who've been in our shoes. She is 14 and has been declining for a while. Biggest issue is her hips, for a while now we haven't been able to take her on long walks and she struggles on our stairs. Took her to the vet a month ago; he thought that despite her age she has decent muscle tone in her legs, so we likely have about a year.

This morning she couldn't stand up. Couldn't get her back legs up. I helped her and laid her on the sofa. After a while she was able to stand and walk a bit, but her hips seemed splayed, almost as though she's trying to balance on a slippery surface. At the moment she's able to walk, but slowly. She spends a lot of her time lying down now, although when people come to the door she goes over to it. Also had a number of poop accidents indoors. I think it's time but I'm so concerned about "killing her" too soon. But wondering if we're being selfish to see how she does. We have an in-home euthanasia service coming tomorrow. Our vet has no appointments today so is unable to see her. Do we wait and see? Go ahead with the appointment?

OP posts:

Aquamarine1029 · 04/10/2019 16:20

Her quality of life is gone and it's time. You are not "killing her." Putting an animal to sleep who is suffering is the most ethical and compassionate thing to do. I'm so sorry about your lovely girl.

1morepieceofcake · 04/10/2019 16:21

It's a tough decision to make. I'm so sorry OP. Have one last night with her and let her know she's loved. Let her go if she's suffering. It's better a week too soon than a week too late. It's good that she goes to sleep at home in her own surroundings and in your arms than a vets surgery
Big hugs OP

Whatsername7 · 04/10/2019 16:23

You don't keep an animal to watch it suffer. If you think she is suffering you are doing a kind thing by ending it.

Millie2013 · 04/10/2019 16:24

I’m so sorry, OP, it’s hesrtbreaking. I’ve had lots of animals put to sleep over the yesrs and I always say “better a day too soon than too late”

thinking of you and your lovely dog

myself2020 · 04/10/2019 16:24

Its such a tough decision... however, the regret of euthanising a dog too late is incredible.
we euthanised our first dog too late (joints were giving out, and he was properly suffering by the end), i will never forgive myself for that

Warmworm · 04/10/2019 16:25

I’m so sorry to hear this. My mum’s beautiful black lab was euthanised when she couldn’t get up without help and struggled to get out to the loo. It must be distressing for them.

Hugs from me.

SomeoneInTheLaaaaaounge · 04/10/2019 16:27

I am heart broken for you. Whatever you decide will be right. If she is PTS now she will be free from a lot of suffering. Sounds like you have given her a amazing life. That’s what matters.

StCharlotte · 04/10/2019 16:33

Sorry to hear this OP. We've done exactly this today for exactly the same reason. We know we've done the right thing but, man, It's hard.

Topseyt · 04/10/2019 16:36

Our yellow labrador is 15 now and also has similar problems with his hind legs.

I have found that having him on NSAIDs (currently he takes carprox or carprieve) morning and evening has really helped him and slowed the deterioration down. It means he can still get up and still enjoys a walk each day, albeit a short one now. Have you spoken to your vet about trying something like that?

I do know what you mean though. It is so hard when they are old. I am acutely aware that we have been on borrowed time with our boy for quite a while now. He is old and a bit creaky now and I know that realistically I too am approaching "that" horrible decision. I just hope I get it right. Mr. Labrador is happy for now though.

Wishing you all the best.

Sheldonoscopy · 04/10/2019 16:37

My cat went from being ‘fine’ to a heart murmur to the specialist and collapsing regularly and sleeping all the time all in under a month. The final day she was refusing to eat and I took her to the vet crying the whole way knowing what would happen. They listened to her and said it sounded like rushing water no defined beats of her heart. I made that heartbreaking decision. I cuddled her and sobbed as I did what was best for her.

Specialist said she’d have a drastically reduced life expectancy but none of us could possibly have guessed she’d have left us so soon.

What I’m trying to say is (from experience) vets aren’t able to say for certain how long an animal has left. They may have thought a year was a good amount of time to expect but you never know what can make an animal go faster.
Main thing is to ease their suffering. You can’t let your amazing companion go on like this. You have to do the kindest thing, and you never know just how long you truly have with anyone or any animal the main thing is to make it special while you do.

So spend tonight having amazing cuddles; talking, favourite meal. Tell her how much you love her. She knows, but this is your grieving process too.

I’m so sorry xx

sillysmiles · 04/10/2019 16:40

Really only you will know when it is time.

Have you on pain killers at the moment? Some sort of NSAID will should massively improve her quality of life if she is not on anything at the moment.

I think when you have done everything you can do, and the quality of life is gone, then it is time.

Perunatop · 04/10/2019 16:43

It sounds a sensible decision if the poor dog can barely stand on its back legs. Sympathies. With a home service the dog will be comfortable in its own surroundings so less traumatic than a trip to the vets.

KittenMittens1 · 04/10/2019 16:46

Aw bless, you poor thing. It's super hard to see something you love so much in pain.

I think you are doing the right thing, As hard as it is though, if you go through with putting her to sleep, stay with her, hug her and stroke her while she goes. let her pass in the arms she knows and trusts no matter how hard it is. her last moments she shouldn't be panicking or worrying.

AbsentmindedWoman · 04/10/2019 16:50

Better a little while too soon than a day too late

I'm sorry, it is very painful to see them go downhill.

Original poster

Episcomama · 04/10/2019 16:54

Thank you, everyone. She's been on carprofen for a while. Ran out a couple of days ago and had actually called in a refill yesterday. Our vet has an opening tomorrow morning and I want him to see her before we proceed. I'm just beside myself.

@StCharlotte sending love to you.

OP posts:

gamerchick · 04/10/2019 16:57

I'm of the mind, once the back legs go it's time. So sorry OP.

BarbariansMum · 04/10/2019 16:57

I dont mean to offend anyone but, ime, most pet owners leave making this sort of decision too long, rather than not long enough.

Seedling111 · 04/10/2019 16:59

I think it's time. I'm so sorry.

NotSoFabReally · 04/10/2019 17:01

Is it definitely her hips that have caused this? I ask because my dog at age 14 suddenly lost the use of his back legs, and it turned out he’d had an ‘old dog vestibular episode’ (little bit like a stroke). He was fine again within a week.

OrchidInTheSun · 04/10/2019 17:03

Better a day too soon rather than a day too late.

I'm so sorry, it's a heartbreaking situation to be in

Whodrankallmygin · 04/10/2019 17:04

So sorry to hear this, such a tough decision. We had exactly same issue with our black lab, same age, and we made decision to euthanase, vets were brilliant and said they'd rather do it too "early" while dog still has dignity than leave too late and dig suffers. Sending hugs xxxxx

interestingname · 04/10/2019 17:07

Awwh... so sorry to hear you're faced with this choice :(

2 weeks ago our 9 year old rescue Collie X was poisoned and killed along with 4 other dogs on our road. Our hearts are absolutely broken - but what's made it worse is that we weren't with her when she died, and it wasn't on her/our terms. Someone took the choice from us.

If it will be an ease to your dog, and you can be there when it happens - then you'll know that you will have done everything you could for her - and I'm sure ye gave her the most wonderful life. They aren't 'just dogs' - they're the most amazing part of a family.

gubbsywubbsy · 04/10/2019 17:12

It's time once a digs Legs go sadly .. get the bet to come to your house .. much calmer .

gubbsywubbsy · 04/10/2019 17:13

dogs
vets
Sorry

DoesItGetAnyBetter · 04/10/2019 17:14

Love & hugs to StCharlotte.

OP no one knows or loves your pup more than you. Trust your instincts.

Much love & sympathies. X

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