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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder where your gaze should go at the dentist

98 replies

Wonderland18 · 01/10/2019 12:36

When I was little I used to look at the reflection in the dentists goggles, as I got older I realised that was awkward (who the fuck wants someone creepy staring at or around their eyes)
I started staring at the light but that felt awkward too.
Now I’ve settled on shutting my eyes the full time.

It’s so strange but it’s something I’ve clearly overthought. Where is appropriate to gaze? Is shutting your eyes the safest? Imagine how creepy you’d look staring up at the dentists face?

Is there even a right answer? Where does everyone look?

OP posts:
nitgel · 01/10/2019 13:02

I close my eyes and also go to my happy place.

Original poster
Wonderland18 · 01/10/2019 13:03

Taking a nap seems like a good shout for longer appointments, it’s about the quietest time I’ll get with my 10 month old running rings around me the rest of the time 🙈

OP posts:
keepingbees · 01/10/2019 13:03

I'd feel too vulnerable with my eyes closed! I look at the ceiling or sometimes I can see the computer screen with my notes on it (it's up on a moving arm thing by the light) and I can see what the nurse is typing in.

m0jit0 · 01/10/2019 13:05

I'm a dentist, most if the time I don't notice where the patient is looking (unless you are staring at us lol) as we tend to focus on your mouth. As a patient I tend to keep my eyes closed.

Nottobesoldseparately · 01/10/2019 13:06

I wear glasses. I take them off whilst in the chair.
It therefore makes no difference where I look as I can't bloody see anything when I do!!
But, I do look towards the window!

greenlavender · 01/10/2019 13:06

Close my eyes

Ambassadorforthedog · 01/10/2019 13:07

We have a blue tacked (out of date) map of the world on the ceiling which I study intently trying to remember what Rhodesia is now called and such like...

Nutkin123 · 01/10/2019 13:08

One eye looking at the dentist and one eye madly wandering around the room. After five minutes I switch eyes and tickle his chin.

Redshoeblueshoe · 01/10/2019 13:09

Am I the only one whose dentist gives you sunglasses ?
Pancake Grin my dentist is gorgeous, I could look at him all day

HotChocolateLover · 01/10/2019 13:09

My dentist has a TV so I watch that but it’s usually playing something about cats 🐈

DontMakeMeShushYou · 01/10/2019 13:12

My dentist has a TV on the ceiling so I watch that.

happystory · 01/10/2019 13:13

Mine has a map of the world, no matter how often I go, it's always fascinating!

recrudescence · 01/10/2019 13:24

Am I the only one whose dentist gives you sunglasses ?

No, I’m given these too - I’m not sure the dentist would be able to tell where you’re looking when you’ve got them on.

NearlyGranny · 01/10/2019 13:29

I close my eyes and visit one of my collection of fields and beaches. Did some amazing snorkelling in the S. Pacific while volunteering earlier this year which has got me through half a dozen hygeinist, replacement filling, splinting repair appointments since I got back. Who knew there were neon blue starfish the size of dinner plates?!

Whatjusthappenedthere · 01/10/2019 13:32

Am I the only person who would not feel comfortable lying prostrate below a TV attached to the ceiling above. No way, those things are heavy.
Anyway, not a dentist, but I am hygienist . I never look to see where the patient is looking. I give them dark glasses to protect their eyes and I wear loupes so can only see a magnified version of their teeth.

SpoonBlender · 01/10/2019 13:34

It doesn't matter. The dentist has their eyes at your teeth or instruments.

Worrying about it is just a general social anxiety thing, and can be treated the same way - bit of CBT perhaps, and a big dose of "of course they're not going to think I'm a swivel-eyed loon, they do this eight hours a day and all their patients will be doing the same, why is my idiot brain trying to make it all about me and causing pointless anxiety?"

Blobby10 · 01/10/2019 13:45

I usually shut my eyes and meditate to keep myself relaxed .. When I was little my dentist had some plastic fish hanging from his ceiling. One of the surgeries at my current practice has a big photo of New York on the ceiling so there's always something to stare at ! Grin I did suggest replacing it with a Where's Wally poster Grin

Instatwat · 01/10/2019 13:53

@pancaketits GrinGrinGrin

CaptainMyCaptain · 01/10/2019 13:57

I find it more awkward at the opticians. You have to keep your eyes open and, practically, stare into their eyes and their face is much closer

Tidypidy · 01/10/2019 14:02

My dentist has a map of town on the ceiling so I plot routes around it. I find her boobs pressed into my ear more concerning than what I'm looking at though!

ElizaPancakes · 01/10/2019 14:06

I close my eyes.

Sux2buthen · 01/10/2019 14:07

Straight into the eyes. And then wink

cheeseislife8 · 01/10/2019 14:26

I just close my eyes too, but even that feels awkward! Maybe I should try the stare and lick!

mumwon · 01/10/2019 14:28

I have a middle aged female dentist - she makes me laugh & talks to me - no embarrassment - (she is a great dentist for nervous patients)

QuestionableMouse · 01/10/2019 14:29

I hate having the light blasting into my eyes so close them.