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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Food

89 replies

1985mummymia · 01/10/2019 09:58

Would you give your 8 ans 10 year old 4 month old baby food?

OP posts:
incognito76 · 01/10/2019 12:48

I love how when you ask advise on here people think they know the whole story, like I said before it's just 1 thing. And I was asking if anyone else would do the same, I personally think it's bad which is fine and my opinion

First of all, if you don't tell people the whole story, obviously people are going to ask questions and fill in the gaps.

Secondly, if you are confident that your opinion is correct, why bother asking?

Basically, instead of posting to say 'I have a problem with my ex and his partner and the way they care for my kids' you instead posted about one single thing with zero context. Just tell the whole story or don't tell anything at all instead of trying to manipulate people into giving you the answers you want to validate your opinion.

Hecateh · 01/10/2019 13:11

I used to love heinz baby food tins when I was a kid. Didn't used to get them often but, during the school holidays, if Monday (always washday) was a rainy day, the weekly wash for 2 adults and 7 children, washed in a single tub, through a mangle, rinsed in the sink and then mangled again with latterly a small spin dryer then endeavouring to drape it round the fireguards and on clothes racks to dry, Mum would resort to whatever was easiest to feed us and shut us up.

I doubt that a tin of baby food was enough so must have had something else with it but my memory was just that of the baby food. My youngest brother is 5 years younger than me so I was probably only when I was about 6. Must also have been a special treat for me to remember it.

As others have said if it's fruit puree that was enjoyed until they realised it was baby food then you are unreasonable and are unreasonable in backing them up.

1985mummymia · 01/10/2019 13:11

Prime example of a gossip. Why would I go into detail about every single thing they do. I have clearly said I wanted to know what others thought. People on here have said no it's not ok and people have said yes it's fine, which is great. People like you who clearly have nothing better to do want to know other details. If air went into it, it would be pretty pointless and going completely of subject.
I suggest maybe you make some friends hun and get out abit but good luck with that.
Sometimes my opinion isn't always right so it's always good to get other people's views and stories. This isn't something I've done across before so I value help from other people.
Twats like you cant just say it's fine or no it's wrong you want to know every little detail because your life is so boring

OP posts:
formerbabe · 01/10/2019 13:13

It's quite an expensive thing to buy regularly as well. Surely a bag of apples, a bunch of bananas, some plain biscuits or breadsticks would be much cheaper and more appropriate.

Coffeeandchocolate9 · 01/10/2019 13:16

@1985mummymia I'm not sure that mumsnet is going to be a happy place for you Confused

1985mummymia · 01/10/2019 13:17

I think you're right lol

OP posts:
Butchyrestingface · 01/10/2019 13:18

I suggest maybe you make some friends hun and get out abit but good luck with that...Twats like you cant just say it's fine or no it's wrong you want to know every little detail because your life is so boring

What a charming poster. Lucky old stepmum.

prawneater · 01/10/2019 13:19

Another lost soul from NM.

SillyMoomin · 01/10/2019 13:19

No need to be so defensive op

You asked for Opinions. People gave them based on the best knowledge they were given

cinderellainyellakissedafella · 01/10/2019 13:22

Confused face Confused

Magicmama92 · 01/10/2019 13:51

I would maybe talk to them and say your daughter dosnt want to have a pouch as she views it as for babys so can they not get some yogurts or fruit instead it would most likely be cheaper too. I can see why they dont want to have baby food. Maybe send them with snacks if the gf is going to be difficult.

1985mummymia · 01/10/2019 14:09
Grin
OP posts:
KellyHall · 01/10/2019 14:09

Yes, I would give anyone of any age baby food but only if they liked it. My mum is in her 60s and is still partial to some jars of chocolate dessert, baby rice and rusks!

If your dd doesn't like it then presumably she won't eat it, it's not going to be forced down her throat? If your ex's partner can't figure out how to feed your dc food they'll like then she has an issue. But it's not your issue, it's hers.

AlexaAmbidextra · 01/10/2019 14:24

I used to love heinz baby food tins when I was a kid.

Oh yes. The chocolate pudding was lush. I remember having flu when I was about 16 and living on this for two weeks. I had fabulous sticky out hip bones. Hmm. Might try it again. Do they still make it?

Celebelly · 01/10/2019 14:27

Is this another Netmums spillover?  There'a been a dramatic increase in posters with 'mummy' in their username of late.

1985mummymia · 01/10/2019 14:35

This is the 1st day of being on here and every user name I put in was taken apart from this one.
I'm sorry if I over reacted I just wanted to know what everyone else thought and felt like I was being made out to be an idiot.
I do appreciate all the replies and input. After all air did ask. I think maybe I read some replies the wrong way and admittedly got defensive

OP posts:
user1483387154 · 01/10/2019 14:38

fruit pouches no problem ...

BlockedandDeleted · 01/10/2019 14:45

@1985mummymia

Primarily, most people on this forum/Mumsnet want to help others figure out their problems and what's really going on so they can help with productive solutions.

AIBU is renown for being a bit of a bear pit though and responses are known for being very forthright and direct. I fear you wandered in not knowing this!

However, it really saddens me that I've noticed a ramp up in overt 'classism' recently.

That sucks and I'm sorry you've been on the receiving end of that.

1985mummymia · 01/10/2019 14:48

Thank you at least I know for the future. I do like to live in a little bubble usually so I guess I'm quite naive

OP posts:
BlockedandDeleted · 01/10/2019 15:21

Mumsnet is a very middle class bubble in itself as such it has hidden, codified and often virtue signalling and contradictory rules.

EG if you dare express a negative opinion on people playing/cheating the benefits system then posters will come down on you like a ton of bricks.

However, posters seem to think it's fun and acceptable to mock people who use the word 'hun' 'hunny' or 'babes' or who have ' "mummy' names or who post in a "NetMums" style (whatever that is) - weird huh?

Likewise tone is very important in relation to the style of responses.

EG A lot of posters here rail again gender stereotyping, but if you dare post that you're angry or in an angry tone you will be labelled aggressive etc.

Post the same dilemma saying you're upset - then you'll get a much more empathetic response.

There is a pattern that the few few responses set the tone for the rest.

This is the worst of Mumsnet

The best of Mumsnet will support you through problems and give very helpful advice and guidance.

AIBU (Am I Being Unreasonable) is a bearpit so expect challenging responses but they should prompt you to be self examining about what your issues are and not to just tear you down.

Chat and Relationships are known to be more gentle.

I know it may come across as gossip but it's really about finding the full story so people can help you - eg I don't think you're really upset about the pouches, but they symbolise much deeper issues, I was trying to get you to talk about those so I could offer you support and advice on the real problems you are going through.

Also people will advance search your user name to find out more about you - this is because Mumsnet is prone to 'trolls' who just post to stir things up or worse, get money, so it's about seeing if you are genuine.

Soontobe60 · 01/10/2019 15:35

@1985mummymia

Your original question doesn't have a yes / no answer. It's a bit like asking if it's ok for your child's stepmother to shout at her. Well, the answer would be no if your child was asking to go to the toilet, but it would be yes if your child was about to stick her hand in a fire.
Context is everything.
So, what baby foods are your children being offered? This is the main information that will determine whether most of us think it's ok or not.

1985mummymia · 01/10/2019 16:20

I disagree with this.
Would you give your 8 and 10 year old 4 month old baby food?
Yes or no...

OP posts:
PatriciaHolm · 01/10/2019 16:29

But as you can see from all the answers, it isn't clear.

Would I give them a jar of age 6 months mushed shepherds pie? No.

Would I give them a pouch of pureed apple like this -
www.amazon.co.uk/GoGo-squeeZ-Apple-Pouches-Multipack/dp/B075BGF47W?tag=mumsnetforu03-21 - Yes.

CalishataFolkart · 01/10/2019 16:30

Yes if they had sensory issues and it was one of the few things they ate.
Yes if I had financial problems and it was the only food in the house.
Yes if they just happen to like them.
Yes if it was part of an unhealthy diet that I was following and imposing on them (which is obviously unreasonable).

No if they are massively out of date.

And so on... That’s what people mean by needing context and it being more than a yes or no answer.

Coffeeandchocolate9 · 01/10/2019 16:31

But the answer with all more of he facts is,

No I would give an 8 year old baby food, however stepmum giving them a squeezy tube of pureed fruit as a snack is no problem.

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