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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Shitty homes

219 replies

madcatladyforever · 27/09/2019 19:24

AIBU to think that if you have bought a huge investment i.e a house you should take take care of it?
I've moved 300 miles from home with work and I'm renting a bedsit while I look for a house to buy.
Every single one I've looked at is a shit hole. Dirty, not decorated in years, a mess and overgrown garden. I feel so despondent.
I don't want to buy a house I'm going to have to do tons of work on and start from scratch in the garden
My own house was modest but it was nicely painted by me, the garden with a bit of hard work was lovely and it sold in 2 weeks after going on the market. The buyers said it was the nicest house in the price range.
I really don't want to buy some shit hole and spend the next 5 years doing it up and having to deep clean it at my age.
Houses here are much cheaper but just so run down and dirty.
If you had an expensive investment would you not want to maintain and look after it inside and out? I just cannot understand the mentality.
I had a look at what should have been a lovely bungalow today in an area of oupstanding natural beauty owned by a sinice bloke and it would have taken several big skips to remove all the crap from the house and Garden before even starting to refurbish and he wanted top dollar for it.

OP posts:
WellButterMyArse · 28/09/2019 15:09

Buying a house is a business transaction. People like moralising about it because of it being a home, but ultimately it's simply a question of whether you can agree mutually acceptable terms.

You aren't entitled to expect other people to present their home in a way that is to your tastes and not theirs OP, they aren't entitled to an offer from you if you don't like it. Nobody is being unreasonable to do as they please with their home and cash. The OP is the FTB equivalent of owners who get insulted by offers below the asking price.

I also think OP is essentially misidentifying the problem here. The issue is that across the UK, even cheaper areas, much housing is artificially inflated to a stupid multiple of local salaries. It's simply accepted and expected that we pay more in real terms for our housing than we did 20 years ago. That is the source of the issue, not a few hundred quids worth of cleaning, gardening and tarting that people have exercised their right not to do.

JaceLancs · 28/09/2019 15:18

Really weird OP why would you need 5 skips when on completion it would be empty?
My house is clean but dated - I would love a new kitchen and bathroom - to landscape garden - new patio etc but can’t afford it
When I was younger I had more energy to expend on diy including painting and decorating but now after working full time all week and caring for elderly parents it takes all my energy to keep on top of basic housework and gardening

SoyDora · 28/09/2019 15:22

5 skips? You do know people take their furniture when they move out?

SmudgeButt · 28/09/2019 15:33

When we were looking for a house I found one estate agent only had grunge places for us to view. so I stopped looking at anything he was offering. We had to adjust what area we wanted to live in and eventually found a lovely place....but it was the 3rd we offered on so even that took time.

Good luck with your search and your new job.

WellButterMyArse · 28/09/2019 15:36

Yeah, that part I don't get. They're not being sold along with all contents are they?

Bluntness100 · 28/09/2019 15:42

I don't really understand this either, other than understand the op is in some form of rage.

Mummybares · 28/09/2019 15:45

I think op is from another country and hasnt bought in the uk before.

CallmeBadJanet · 28/09/2019 17:36

Maybe other people's lives are not as straightforward as yours, so home and garden maintenance go by the wayside. Maybe people have to deal with demanding jobs, low pay, lack of transport, lack of support network, children with SEND, health difficulties, shift work, mental illness, elderly relatives, bereavement, challenging children, studying for qualifications, redundancy, living on benefits. Do I have to go on? Stop being so judgemental of people you don't know. You don't know their circumstances.

leckford · 28/09/2019 17:41

The having the lovely home is a fairly new idea. People of my parents generation, now no longer with us, had a house, if things needed to be repaired they were. The idea of new kitchens, bathrooms were a strange idea, what they had worked why change it?

bmbonanza · 28/09/2019 17:50

Different people worry about different things - for lots of people life is too short to worry if your house looks like a show home or not. Maybe they spend the money and time on people not bricks and mortar?

OtraCosaMariposa · 28/09/2019 17:54

know that I'm going to have to hiredirect 5 big skips

Err... you do know that most people take their stuff out of the house when they move, don't you?

Instagrrr · 28/09/2019 18:04

We are currently looking to buy. In my experience it’s been elderly people’s homes who’ve been like this.

My grandad was the same... worked his entire life, enjoyed house prices rising and masses of equity made, and a brilliant pension.

Kept 10s of thousands of £ in the back of his wardrobe but yet they sat there with filthy threadbare carpets from the 70s, and the original kitchen with broken hinges, wallpaper hanging off the walls 🤷🏼‍♀️ This is not uncommon and nearly everyone I’ve spoken to has said the same of the elderly they know.

I find it sad that people choose to live like that when a lot can easily afford not to

MrsBobDylan · 28/09/2019 18:09

Op, if the houses you describe really are that dirty, then they will be priced to sell (at the lowest end of the market).

We purposefully looked for the cheapest house we could find when we moved this year. And guess what, the cheapest was the dirtiest. I am yet to see a cheaper or dirtier house for sale in the town we moved too.

The previous tenant had died in the house after being bed bound for 10 years. I don't think the house had been properly cleaned in that time. I met one neighbour who used to pop over to visit the previous owner every day. She described it as the kind of house where you needed to wipe your feet on the way out.

It took us 3 skips and 20 trips to the tip just to empty the house. Oh and we had to move into it before we could do any cleaning/work and we have 3 kids.

It wasn't easy and I don't think I could do it again, but it was definitely worth it in the end.

Marshmallow91 · 28/09/2019 18:16

I was going to comment, but @HundredMilesAnHour said exactly what I wanted to.

And if the effort is that little, why don't you just do it after you move in?

Ilovemypantry · 28/09/2019 18:31

Might be worth looking at new build properties OP. prices are usually quite competitive and everything will be nice and shiny and new...perfect!

Nanalisa60 · 28/09/2019 18:39

I have always liked buying shit holes!! I have always loved turning them around!! I have never bought a shiny brand new house only ones that as my sons once said smell of old ladies!! Always look at the bones of the house and think what you could make it and but a offer in that you are happy with.

IAmALazyArse · 28/09/2019 18:47

The house which shall for ever be in my heart was like some pp described. Old man lived in there. It didn't even have a central heating, boiler was 30+years, old kitchen rotted etc. But it was solid and with nice neighbours. Only shame was we couldn't afford all the works (heating and boiler were not mention in the specs).
I still sometimes think about that house. But I love mine. Had to up the budget though. We are still working on it, minor things compare yo the other one, few years after buying and I love how it's becoming really ours😁

northernruth · 28/09/2019 19:06

Just bookmarking and also want to say new build properties are not generally a good investment. Particularly on a large site, the value of your house will go down as soon as you move in. Plus there's always loads of snagging, and you're basically paying for a new kitchen and 11 new bathrooms on your morgage for 25 years.

IAmALazyArse · 28/09/2019 19:08

I wouldn't buy a new build tbh. Too many bad stories. Plus in my are they are smaller and for some reason well over 2x the price of solid 30s semi😮

thatoldpinkumbrella · 28/09/2019 19:25

I agree with you - I understand the lack of money to a point, but mess? I have visited so many places with piles of shoes in the entrance, bed unmade or badly made, the small bathroom full of stuff.

A very dated house is fine, much preferable actually, I'd rather buy that any day that pay a premium because someone has hidden problems with a shitty but new grey carpet and a bit of fablon! Old wall paper means there's no hidden mould behind.

I disagree that it's old people who can have horrible houses, I have seen plenty clearly occupied by younger couples!

People use to be a lot more house proud in the past, the way that no one would have gone shopping in their pjs. Most would have been mortified to have visitors in a messy, dirty, unkept house.

Alleycat1 · 28/09/2019 19:32

Soap, water and elbow grease costs little. Mowing the lawn once a week is not too onerous for most people. I worked as an estate agent for a while and I can assure you that even very expensive homes can be grubby and cluttered. Trying to get people to tidy up and keep the place clean can be a very thankless task. Anyone remember the House Doctor?

transformandriseup · 28/09/2019 19:40

Lots of houses where I used to live in Cornwall were like this. It was the result of working long hours for low wages often combined with MH problems. One neighbor with depression had weeds that were higher than his fence and a car that he couldn’t afford to drive and was rotting into the garden. He worked but had no disposable income.

Huxley1234 · 28/09/2019 20:04

I totally agree with you madcatlady. It costs very little to keep your home clean when viewers are hoping to buy. I am looking at the moment and I know as soon as I see the kitchen whether or not it will appeal to me.

user1497207191 · 28/09/2019 20:04

And as usual, people go to extremes. Like posters saying they don't want to live in a show house. Show houses are the extreme end of the scale. Having a bit of self respect and using a bit of elbow grease occasionally isn't too much to expect surely? A house doesn't have to be like a show house to actually be reasonably clean and reasonably tidy. And yes, even expensive houses can be ridiculously dirty as the occupants probably get used to living in squalor and just don't realise how bad it is.

Kerrywerrywoo1 · 28/09/2019 20:04

I flip houses for a living. Move anywhere we see a nice house that’s in need of TLC, do it up and sell it. Firstly....if all the houses you are viewing are shit then your budget must be shit or you are buying in a run down area (and your budgets shit). If in fact, it’s only say.. 25% are shit ....then that’s more average. So your expectations are unrealistic. The asking price is pure fiction. A house is worth what it can sell for. You estimate your work and you offer minus that cost and get the decorators and builders in if you won’t do it yourself. No matter WHAT your budget there WILL always be something that needs doing. We just offered 20 grand under asking. Got it. Even offered 2 grand if the lady would move fast and bought this is 8 days. We love seeing the potential come out it’s amazing. We just budget it into the buying price - then we get it perfect. Just lower your expectations......find a house you LIKE then work on cost. Prices are negotiable

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