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Original poster

To use the shared space very early?

79 replies

Refreshretry · 26/09/2019 10:00

As per another thread I have, I'm started a new job. I also live in a shared house, I have my own bathroom but share the kitchen facilities.

New job entails very early starts so I'll be up at 5. I won't be doing a lot before then as I'll be having breakfast at work, maybe a quick shower and a coffee but I'm not sure whether this is too early to use the shared facilities?

I won't be banging and crashing around the house but will need to turn the lights on and use the kettle. If someone is in the kitchen in the morning I can hear them so I'm guessing they'll be able to hear me and I don't want to cause any upset or bad feelings by waking people hours before they have to be up. Would I be better off getting a coffee machine/kettle for my room and just making my coffee in there so as to not use the shared facilities? Or should I just use them as normal and be as quiet as I can?

OP posts:
DarlingNikita · 26/09/2019 11:07

Just ask?

It's swings and roundabouts, though, isn't it? You might disturb someone by being up early, but then they might disturb you coming in late. It's part of living with people.

DP and I have a lodger and we all disturb each other in some way every now and then. You acknowledge and apologise and it's OK.

On coffee specifically, though, I'd suggest not grinding beans at the crack of butt (if you normally make coffee that way). I have both beans and ready-ground coffee and if I know the grinder might disturb someone I just use ground. Then all I have to do is boil the kettle, which is not the end of the world.

I don't think you should use a bottle or flask or get a kettle for your room. It'd feel like living in a depressing B&B.

everyonecaneffoff · 26/09/2019 11:08

You are also paying rent, just like the others, so you are entitled to use the facilities you are paying for whenever you want.
Others might have jobs where the come in late at night. Some people don't go to bed until after midnight anyway and might be using the shower or toilet very late.
It's part of shared living.

That said, everyone has a responsibility to minimize disruption for the others - so if people are coming in very late or getting up very early they should do this as quietly as possible. No doors banging. Not switching lights on all over the place. Walking around quietly - shoes on or off at the front door for example. Being careful not to make too much noise in the kitchen etc.
If the kettle is really really loud consider boiling water the night before and putting it in a thermos. Similarly, if the shower is loud and next to someone's room, maybe shower the night before.
It's all about consideration for others.

I spent 5 years in a relationship with someone who had to get up early for work and couldn't do this quietly. Nor could he come in quietly after a night out. Disrupted sleep over a long period of time is very bad.... so do consider this when thinking about your early morning routine.

MotherWol · 26/09/2019 11:12

Could you get a small coffee machine like this Morphy Richards to keep in your room?

meccacos2 · 26/09/2019 11:12

@Dementornator

Tbh, you’re the one who sounds like an a-hole

That was entirely unnecessary- I was not at all saying the OP was an asshole. I still told her she should be free to have a shower - just not turn on every single light in the house and boil the kettle.

Because it’s not her house!!

Some people are saying shower the night before and grab a coffee on the way to work.

I merely suggested she still have a shower but not fuff about boiling the kettle and making coffee.

Celebelly · 26/09/2019 11:13

I think as long as you're considerate; it's fine. Ear plugs go a long way to blocking out that kind of general noise, and I'd be using them anyway if I lived in shared accommodation. It's your home too, and having a shower and a cup of coffee in the morning is entirely reasonable. The fact you are worried about it suggests you will be as quiet as

Celebelly · 26/09/2019 11:15

*possible

I think it's a bit bonkers to be faffing about with flasks in your room, tbh. As long as your kettle isn't one of those whistling ones!

Kaddm · 26/09/2019 11:16

I would say showering around 5am is antisocial and you should try to do that the previous evening.

Boiling the kettle - is this necessary? Could you have another drink or get a drink at work?

My FIL used to have an early start like this for work and just shoved his clothes on and got out of the house so as not to disturb anyone else.

Overall I would say that at 5am you have a responsibility not to wake anyone else up.

QuestionableMouse · 26/09/2019 11:18

My old flatmate used to wake up early and blend a morning smoothie. It got to the point where I genuinely wanted to kill her. (Was usually around 4:30!)

You can get kettles the boil quite quietly though and things like closing the door behind you should help. Maybe put the kettle on then stand on the landing to see how loud it is before you decide anything.

P1nkHeartLovesCake · 26/09/2019 11:22

How loud are some of your kettles? Confused DH leaves for work at 5am to get the train Ito London and he has NEVER woken the dc by using the sodding kettle

OP did NOT say anywhere in her op that she was going to turn every light on 🙄

Yes it is OP house, as much as it’s the others house too. When one pays rent that is your home

It’s a SHARED house, so anyone with a brain can work out people will be coming/going at different times of day. As long as you are not purposely slamming doors then it’s acceptable. Having a shower and making a hot drink is absolutely fine.

I think some people like meccacos2 just aren’t suited to house sharing and let’s face it didn’t come across great in the posts they made

DarlingNikita · 26/09/2019 11:27

Because it’s not her house!!
Whose is it then?

LisaRoundTheMulberryBush · 26/09/2019 11:28

How loud are all your kettles people???

Or are your walls made of paper?

I'm utterly bemused by this thread.

butteryellow · 26/09/2019 11:29

Is there any difference between a kettle in your room and a kettle in the shared space? If noise travels, it's going to travel no matter which room.

TBH, as long as you're not clashing and banging mugs and spoons, slamming the door on your way out etc. I would think it would be fine - unless you're living with a load of barstaff who get in at 2 and sleep until 11 that is....

Do you have any rules around communal areas? Or is it just of the 'be considerate' style?

crosspelican · 26/09/2019 11:36

If it's a house, the kitchen is presumably further away from your housemates' bedrooms than your bedroom, right? Probably better to put the kettle on in the kitchen, so. Although with the early start it might be nice to have the water already boiled and in a thermos so you can have your cup of tea in bed! I did that when DD2 was born & I slept with her on my own in the attic conversion - I had a flask of hot water so I could make myself tea in the morning without having to drag my sorry self out of bed or wait for DH to wake up. I tried having a kettle too, but the flask was easier.

bluebluezoo · 26/09/2019 11:38

I have early starts for work.

i shower the night before. In the morning I get dressed, pull in clothes and leave. I can’t be arsed getting up 20 minutes earlier and faffing about with kettles and hairdryers.

Coffee can wait until on the way to or at work.

I can get up at 5 and be in work by 5.40.

recrudescence · 26/09/2019 11:41

Yes, be considerate but you don’t need to apologise for yourself. A shower and a coffee is a perfectly normal way to start the day. And some people’s days start early.

burritofan · 26/09/2019 11:45

Depends on the layout of the house but surely it's better to tiptoe down to the kitchen at 5am, close the door, and quietly get on with things, than attempt stealth bedroom coffee-making upstairs.

At that time though I would have a shower the night before and do as little as possible in the morning: alarm for 4.50am, roll out of bed, clothes on, grab cup to buy coffee on the way, quietly out of the front door, makeup on the bus or tube. (Definitely don't be the door-slamming housemate; the one in the front bedroom will despise you.)

Lweji · 26/09/2019 11:46

It really depends on the house layout.

Could you close the kitchen door when you're using it?
Isn't your room closer to other rooms than the kitchen?
If you're having breakfast at work, do you need coffee in the morning if it's too loud? Maybe cereal or a yoghurt would be quieter.

NoSquirrels · 26/09/2019 11:47

www.amazon.co.uk/Breville-HotCup-Water-Dispenser-Litre/dp/B001L5SSGQ/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?keywords=one+cup+kettle&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&qid=1569494669&sr=8-3

I’d get one of those for my room, but only because I am inhuman in the mornings before tea, and it’s so early and I am lazy!

I actually think your shower at 5 am might be more of an issue - presumably that’s closer to the bedrooms?

MrsGideon · 26/09/2019 11:53

Also, what if the OP couldn't have her breakfast at work and wasn't able to stop and buy some on the way in? Would she just have to go without breakfast in order to not inconvenience her housemates?

SunshineAngel · 26/09/2019 12:03

I would do what I could the night before, so shower before bed instead of in the morning. But if I wanted a brew or something to eat, I'd absolutely use the kitchen. It's not your fault you have to get up early, and so long as you're as quiet as possible they can't really complain.

PeachesAndMayo · 26/09/2019 12:03

Honestly, I would say yes, do a kettle in your own room. It's very considerate of you. And offer your flatmates earplugs with an apology - but reinforce how excited you are about your new job.

MsPepperPotts · 26/09/2019 12:11

I think you are being very considerate to your housemates.
Like other pps mention...kettle in your room.
I would be inclined to shower before I went to bed, having experience of getting up at 5am for over 5years...it was too cold for me shower in the morning for about 9months of the year. So I always had one before bed.

Wildthyme · 26/09/2019 12:22

You lot are insane.

If course its fine to boil a fucking kettle. Don't you allow yourself to be be browbeaten into obeisance by other posters.

AryaStarkWolf · 26/09/2019 12:23

A shower is probably louder than a kettle boiling, I think it should be fine but maybe mention it out of courtesy?

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