Are my BIL and DH BU or am I?

[morethanalurker]

I’m fully prepared to hear I’m being unreasonable. It will seem ridiculous when you read it but I have got quite upset.

I got a new phone and decided to sell my old one. DH made me promise not to sell it for any less than it was going on a mobile phone resale site. I’ve been ripped off before so agreed. All is fine.

Get a few people interested, and then DH gets a text from BIL. BIL would like to buy it for DN (10). BIL has my number I might add but texts DH instead anyway.

Somehow DH agrees I should sell it to BIL for less than he originally said I should sell it for. Again, fine, it’s BIL. Agree.

BIL explains he doesn’t have that money in full at the moment, can he pay me some and then the rest the following month? Quite frankly the money would be handy now but these resale sites take ages anyway so agree.

DH gets a text asking if BIL can come to ours to pick up the phone today. BIL hasn’t visited us all year. DH asks how much BIL planned to pay for the phone and BIL says he’s got no money.

I said I kind of expected him to have at least a bit of money when picking up the phone. DH repeated to BIL. BIL is now no longer speaking to either of us.

DH thinks AIBU because BIL is family and why shouldn’t BIL pick up the phone early? I think BIL has form for being a bit of a CF, has barely spoken to us until he wanted the phone and expects to stroll up and take it this evening.

AIBU? If I am I will sincerely apologise to all parties involved. I know it sounds pathetic but DH had a bit of a go and I’ve got quite upset about it.

YANBU at all!

@BiologyIsntBigoted mine is worth a similar price, and I also don’t fancy just giving it away.

Of course it’s up to his parents what phone they buy DN but that would potentially be a concern if it broke before any payment had been paid!

I don’t think you’ll ever see that money.

I hope you didn't give him the phone?

I didn’t give him the phone no. After DH asked how much he planned to pay BIL said he had no money and was ‘pretty shocked’ that he’d even been asked to pay something up front.

Now I’ve posted here I’m actually getting very angry with DH for still being in a strop about it!

He's never going to pay you.

How much he planned to pay BIL??

How much BIL planned to pay sorry!

No money, no phone
If he is not speaking to you then consider that a no and sell it elsewhere
You are not a charity.

That’s a ridiculous situation. If DH wants BIL to have the phone so badly then he could pay you and BIL can one you. Unless you have shared finances of course.
YANBU, it’s your phone and you want some money for it. If BIL can’t pay, he can’t buy it.

Sorry, that was meant to be BIL can owe him!

No you are definitely not being unreasonable.there must be something about BILs, this sounds exactly like something he would do. My sympathies.

DN would have broken the phone within a month and BIL would have then refused to pay as "the phone is useless now".

Tell your husband that BIL isn't getting the phone. End of argument.

Don’t sell it BIL he has no intention of paying you for the phone.

BIL has no intention of paying you. Of which I suspect DH is well aware.

I would message BIL (myself, not via DH) and tell him that he can have the phone if he provides the full amount you want, in cash, within seven days. Tell him that if he doesn't, you will sell the phone elsewhere. And that you are not open to negotiation.

At 10 she doesn't need a phone anyway.
Bet it was for bil.
Your dh is a soft shit.

Nope, cash on collection or no phone. You’re clearly not close so would I fuck give him £400 of phone without getting paid

pair of Twats.. sell the phone OP.

I would tell your DH to give his phone to his brother and you’ll sell yours as planned.

If your husband is so upset about it, he can give you the money for the phone himself and get the money back off his brother when he's got it (guessing never,)

Cheeky fuckers like your BIL are easily offended. How very unreasonable of you not to gift wrap your phone, put a bow on top, and give to him gratis As fucking if...

Good on you for standing firm, OP. Tell your dh to gift his 10yo dn a cheap PAYG phone on his next birthday as that would be far more appropriate for his age.

Even if he text now to say he had a few quid I'd say it's sold. Fuck him, he's an entitled CF. Tell Dh to give him his phone if he's so concerned that his 10year old DN is missing out.

@DonKeyshot I know! How very ridiculous of me!

Sparklypurpleunicorns has come up with a good plan.

Tell your dh to stop stropping and buy your phone from you so that he can sell it to his db. I suspect this may cure your dh of any future desire to 'sell' to relatives.

I agree with other posters, you would never have received a penny if you had handed it over.
You did the right thing. X