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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

GP accused me of stealing

90 replies

Justme1234567 · 25/09/2019 19:44

So today I went into my local walk in centre as I couldn’t get a gp appointment for being in the middle of a mental health crisis, so he was lovely at first, listened to me and gave me tissue. So I had stopped crying and didn’t want to put my dirty tissue on his table so I put it in my pocket as I was doing that he took off his glasses and his face looked very angry and he said to me “you just put my thermometer in your pocket” I said “what sorry?” and he repeated himself so where I’m very anxious I took everything out of my pocket and showed him I don’t have it and he said what else is in there and I got him to feel my pocket and he said, “sorry, I thought I had put it there but I’ve put it here!” Aibu to make a complaint?? I know it was a mistake but I left feeling even worse than when I went in, I was extremely embarrassed and burst out crying again when I left, I really felt like there was a different way to deal with this!

OP posts:

womenspeakout · 25/09/2019 23:04

Yes, complain, he accused you of being a thief and a liar and he only had to look on his desk.

You was also in the middle of a MH crisis, and he treated you this way. It's pretty dangerous of him.

Notajogger · 25/09/2019 23:11

Ridiculous way to treat anyone let alone someone in the middle of a MH crisis. I'd focus on that part in your complaint, they'd be more likely to act on it I suspect.

Happymum12345 · 25/09/2019 23:24

He sounds like he was having a bad day-as have you. It does sound like a mistake & he was overly nice afterwards. Perhaps he has mental health issues too. Forgive & move on. I hope you feel better soon

VenusTiger · 26/09/2019 01:09

Agree with CAG12 - horrible situation for both of you, I’m sure he’s feeling very embarrassed, but, if he thought you’d pocketed it, of course he was going to ask you for it back.

He apologised didn’t he?

I wouldn’t be complaining about this personally - how do you know what type of day he was having with sick patients before you turned up.

It wasn’t a nice experience for you either. But let it go.

FunkyKingston · 26/09/2019 01:16

At the risk of being controversial. If he genuinly believed you'd took it, he was more than within his rights to ask you if you had. What was he supposed to do? Just let you walk out with it if you had? Its a walk in centre so he wouldnt have known you personally

"Oh I'm sorry, I think you might have picked up my thermometer by mistake"

outherealone · 26/09/2019 02:07

A similar thing happened to me in Boots years ago. They’d handed my prescription (controlled drug for pain management) to somebody else and then accused me of stealing it when I said it hadn’t come to me. I was taken into a consultation room and searched, it was awful.
Bizarrely, they hadn’t been able to completely fulfil the prescription so the other person had taken it to Superdrug who then phoned Boots to query it as this person had no ID. It was an awful experience, I was made to feel bad because the person doing the Boots prescriptions was new and had apparently been upset by her mistake so I never complained but the event was humiliating. In my lunch break with a queue of people all watching me get accused of lying and stealing. Sending sympathy.

CrumpetyTea · 26/09/2019 06:42

He didn't accuse you of being a thief though did he- he just thought you'd put it in your pocket- maybe by mistake maybe on purpose (I would have assumed he meant the former)
maybe he could have phrased it better like FunkyKingston said and he definitely should have checked before asking you to feel your pocket etc but he didn't say that he thought you'd stolen it

RedHelenB · 26/09/2019 07:07

If he was nice about it after then he will have felt bad but a walk in centre would no doubt often have stuff nicked. Other than creating more dram I dont really see what a complaint would achieve.

Lovelydovey · 26/09/2019 07:15

He handled it badly, especially given the reason you were visiting.

This will feel less of an issue with time - these things always feel much more raw when they first happen. But nobody would consider it inappropriate if you were to complain.

When you are feeling down, even the slightest criticism - let alone something like this - can trigger an extreme reaction. I remember crying when I bumped into an old man and he shouted at me and refused to accept my sincere and heartfelt apology for what was an accident.

IdiotInDisguise · 26/09/2019 07:27

He didn't accuse you of being a thief though did he- he just thought you'd put it in your pocket

That makes it right, you see op? Nothing to be upset about, the Dr is not in the wrong, it is you who are taking things too personally!

What a stupid reasoning... “he didn’t accuse you of being a thief, he just accused you of acting as a thief” That does NOT make things right.

Karwomannghia · 26/09/2019 07:37

I understand it feels horrible but he made a mistake and apologised. You asked him to feel your pocket. He didn’t accuse you of stealing he said you’d put it in your pocket. He thought you had and did not go the right way round asking you. What do you want to achieve by making a complaint?

31RueCambon75001 · 26/09/2019 07:39

I was with a small group of friends (all irish) and we were accused of stealing from a jewellery stall trader at camden market 20 yrs ago. Still makes me cross. But if it had been a doctor i would have been much more upset.

31RueCambon75001 · 26/09/2019 07:40

@karwomannghia standing up for yrslf is important not just for the outcome but for self esteem.

CandyLeBonBon · 26/09/2019 07:41

Erm how can anyone pick up a thermometer accidentally with some tissues? I assume we're talking about the big hand held ones you poke in someone's ear?

Or are you referring to the small mercury ones that no-one uses any more?

How bizarre

Adviceorhelp · 26/09/2019 08:02

This is so shocking! You poor thing. I agree that you should make a complaint for your own self esteem. This is an awful incident. So sorry you had this happen.

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