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Original poster

Or is my husband just as much to blame

63 replies

redcherry34 · 22/09/2019 08:38

Myself and my husband decided to go to Disneyland with our children for Christmas this year.
I did most of the research and I got a quote from an independent travel agent online that had nothing but great reviews.

I discussed it with my husband and he agreed it was a good price and gave me his credit card to pay the deposit. I had nothing but great communication from the company even when I wanted to add on more in June of this year or clarify something their response was almost immediate.

The final payment was due and I wanted to add on some character meals ect but I started seeing stuff on Facebook about the company that was negative. I made contact with the company twice and received no answers and then heard of how people weren't getting reference numbers and one family arrived to Disneyland to no booking.

I told my husband I wasn't happy to pay the balance as I felt uneasy about this so I started the proceedings for a chargeback and we rebooked again with Disney direct at a slightly more expensive cost. My husband isn't annoyed about this and was very calm when I told him whereas I was upset that we got scammed but he keeps making little digs at me now and when I called him out on it he was like but it is your fault you booked it.

Am I not right in thinking that since I discussed it with him before I booked it and he didn't ask to see the company's page or for any details on the company he's just as responsible? Thanks

OP posts:
GinNotGym19 · 22/09/2019 09:21

I don’t think it matters, I think you should both be relieved and look on the bright side. you didn’t end up turning up to no booking and you was able to get the chargeback. It would of been a disaster for the kids if you ended up in France with no holiday.
Also with all the stuff about Thomas cook id just be happy it wasn’t a package holiday.
Try and forget about it and look forward to going!

Oldraver · 22/09/2019 09:22

He's being a twat...even the big boys can go bust

NoSauce · 22/09/2019 09:24

It wasn’t your fault. What sort of things is he saying Op?

73Sunglasslover · 22/09/2019 09:27

I'm not sure blame is the issue but I do think it's a little rude to leave all the work to you and then have a go like this afterwards.

youarenotkiddingme · 22/09/2019 09:30

How is he making digs? Is he bringing it up at random times? Or it's when you are both discussing holiday? Or when you bring up holiday?

It seems odd it's become an issue. It'll end up spoiling the holiday.

You've booked now so it's over 🤷‍♀️

Munchietime · 22/09/2019 09:32

Is it Go West? They weren't licenced at all. Their website didn't say they would offer any protection.

I'm a travel agent. A friend asked if I could beat a quote from them. I couldn't. I yold my friend I was concerned about the lack of protection, no ATOL for example. I think she thought I just didn't want to lose a booking. She's now £3k out of pocket.

ImGenderfree · 22/09/2019 09:37

You won’t have lost anything if you get the chargeback back? You used a credit card specifically for that? Not sure why you are at fault.

That is why I use a credit card to lay for a holiday - it’s an extra level of protection. My DH used to work in the travel industry Munchitime and I always ask him to check things over from a protection point of view. We’ve not booked a few things and gone somewhere else if the level of protection wasn’t right.

NearlyGranny · 22/09/2019 09:39

I used to wonder why everything that went wrong always seemed to be my fault until I twigged that it was because I was the one doing everything!

Change that and it stops.

MrsBobDylan · 22/09/2019 09:42

My parents spent their 50 year relationship arguing about who was 'to blame'.

I spent my childhood listening to it.

They never could work out who was really at fault. However, everyone else knew it was because they were both argumentative fools.

Drop it.

MrsAJ27 · 22/09/2019 09:42

Tell him to grow up and he can book all future holidays.

1300cakes · 22/09/2019 09:52

No one needs to take the blame, as nothing bad happened in the end. At first you were slightly more to blame, as you booked it. However you also saved the day by realising and getting your money back, bringing your blame count back to zero.

I get why you are annoyed though. My DH won't do any bookings for holidays. To a ridiculous extent. For example, once we were looking up train tickets on his phone and picked out the ones we wanted and added them to the cart. He then shut the page and said "you can book them now". He doesn't want to bother himself researching or worry that he has made a mistake. We've been on a few long holidays that have involved 50+ bookings each. Of course there will be at least one mistake in all that. And he wants to make sure it's me to blame.

Orangecake123 · 22/09/2019 09:54

The only person to blame is that crap company.

It's not your fault. It's just something that is.

DCIRozHuntley · 22/09/2019 09:57

God this GWWM thing has got so many people. It's awful. Every time I read another case I just think "There but for the grace of God go I." I very nearly booked with them but it was a bit too complicated and not much cheaper as we need quite specific room requirements.

No one's fault, just a thing that happened.

There's a GWWM support group on Facebook - if you haven't already, would you mind sharing how you got the money back etc.

Thank God you paid the deposit on credit card.

Juells · 22/09/2019 10:02

Cancelled and got your money back when you suspected there was a problem. Booked elsewhere. A non-event in most normal people's lives. WTF is there for anyone to get sniffy about?

He's a point-scoring wanker.

BarbariansMum · 22/09/2019 10:11

@NearlyGranny has nailed it. My family are very clear when it comes to holidays - either I organise it all and they go along with what I've organised, no complaints or they can step up and help. No takers on the latter yet.

ChicCroissant · 22/09/2019 10:17

Am I not right in thinking that since I discussed it with him before I booked it and he didn't ask to see the company's page or for any details on the company he's just as responsible?

No, he's not responsible - my DH tends to book holidays and I don't check the details after he's done so! If the situation has been fixed why is there any blame at all? Are you so upset about it that you keep raising it, OP, or is it the digs that are getting to you?

tillytrotter1 · 22/09/2019 10:45

When it comes to travel my OH works on the principle that if you don't make a decision you can never be wrong!! I don't mind, I think I was a travel agent in another life but it gets a bit frustrating when, as we were checking in for a 5 week road trip to the US, he's saying And where are we stopping tonight??
The upside is that he's so computer illiterate that he has no idea of how to get onto the on-line bank accounts!

woodchuck99 · 22/09/2019 10:47

I don't think that either of you are to blame. You could have been more careful but at the same time he could have looked into what you were doing. He is being a knob to make digs now about it though. If you choose to let the other person do all the "mental load" stuff you can't then complain if something doesn't go well.

altiara · 22/09/2019 10:50

He’s not responsible for the booking. You did the groundwork and booked it.
But he is being a dick.

blackcat86 · 22/09/2019 10:52

No he isnt jointly responsible as you did the research and made the choices. Presumably you wouldn't both of have had time to do that. These things happen and I can imagine if it were me I would be a bit embarrassed and looking to share the blame out of a little self preservation. Rather than trying to blame him to it would be healthier to explain that you already feel angry/silly/frustrated with what's happened and you dont need him rubbing it in

woodchuck99 · 22/09/2019 10:57

No he isnt jointly responsible as you did the research and made the choices.

But he could have got involved in making those choices. He chose to let OP do all the work so should shut up if things go wrong.

SistersOfPercy · 22/09/2019 10:59

God this GWWM thing has got so many people. It's awful

Have they actually gone now then? I read something last week on their page about people spreading rumours and everything was fine.

Awful, feel sorry for everyone who's lost money to this.

thecatinthetwat · 22/09/2019 11:02

As a rule though, the person doing the research and booking is responsible, because they have taken on that responsibility.

My husband and I have an agreement that each person is responsible for checking things out.

These things involve a lot of work sometimes and it’s helpful for someone else to cast their eyes over it. So both are responsible.

It’s a bit rubbish to expect one person to research, plan and book a holiday without input from the other isn’t it?

Your dh is being a twat.

woodchuck99 · 22/09/2019 11:08

As a rule though, the person doing the research and booking is responsible, because they have taken on that responsibility.

That would be fine if someone actually wants to take on all the responsibility and doesn't want the other person to be involved but that is rarely the case is it? Often if one person is doing all the research and work it is because the other person is not bothering to contribute. In that situation the person who put their feet up and contributed nothing should shut up if things go wrong.

Shitonthebloodything · 22/09/2019 11:08

Real shame that the company turned out to be scammy but in all honesty, this is something we'd laugh about in our house.
'remember that time you got us scammed by Mickey Mouse?' Haha 'yes, remember that time you were a dick?'
It's just a non issue once the money's come back and it's been rebooked. No need for blaming at all unless he's just joking around.
Are things always this serious?

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