To ask if you've ever been caught short

[Sugartits27]

I'm suffering from really bad IBS-D at the minute. So much so that i darent go out. I've had to ask a friend to do the 10 minute school run for the past two days because I'm frightened of going. Long car journeys or going anywhere without a loo are out of the question.

I think a lot of this is also in my head. I give too much power to it and sometimes worrying makes my symptoms worse. I'm trying to rationalise the worst possible outcome and put it into context so I can actually start living again and not be ruled by my bowels!

So with that in mind, aibu to ask you to tell me your stories of getting caught short and what happened/how you managed it....

I’ve had this problem in my own bloody house because DP was taking ages in the toilet! I had to run out of aldi once leaving my shopping on the till and find a pub.

It’s horrific. I try not to travel anywhere too soon after eating as the urgency can be really intense and sudden.

Its a little thing, but I find having a change of clothes on me can really help ease the anxiety (and therefore symptoms). Depends on the situation obviously, but I have a half hour commute with no services en route, so knowing that if it happens I can just get myself cleaned up and changed really helps.

I agree, it’s a nightmare. I had some bowel removed and unfortunately this has resulted in poor control. Things I should be looking forward to are spoilt by anxiety about ‘what if’.

At least if one’s going to be sick when out and about one can be sick in a bag or something but not with incontinence.

I’ve found some ways of improving matters - though I know everyone’s different.
As a pp said, I always get up in plenty of time and try to ‘go’ before I go out. Sometimes I use a glycerine suppository.
I drink tea but eat nothing for breakfast.
Incontinence pants can give a little piece of mind as at least the mess would be avoided.
I sometimes use the silicon ‘bumpons’ mentioned by a pp though I’m not sure how much weight they can bear without giving way.
I take Imodium and also the doctor lets me have a bottle of codeine linctus which is the only thing - for me - that is guaranteed to work. However he only lets me have it on the condition I keep it for emergencies. For example the family were invited to go for a long walk with friends on the Downs near us and a picnic. There’s no cover, just miles of grassland but the linctus allowed to me enjoy a lovely day out.
It’s addictive though, so has to be treated with great caution.

@Andante57
I had not heard them called that . A much better name.
The healthy bowel nurse called them anal plugs . I was fairly horrified !
I find they do hold any leakage .

I have the same - months can go by occasionally between severe attacks but as soon as I have to do anything stressful or time-sensitive in the morning, I'll be unable to stray 50 feet from a toilet.

I actually stopped working outside the home because I was having an attack every morning (I know it's stress / tension-related) and would be in agony of 'will I make it?' as I scuttled into the office and ran for the loos.

My worst was driving my 11 year old son and his friend to school half an hour away one day. Massive D attack on the way out of the house, had to beg to use friend's toilet at that pick up then half an hour of sweating and unbearable cramps as I sat in rural traffic with the kids in the car. I virtually shoved them out while still moving at the other end so I could handbrake turn to get to a loo!

One of my few actual accidents and a VERY late start to work... 😥

I also used to take 2-3 Imodium as soon as I woke up every day in an effort to stave it off and get through the commute / school run. It's no way to manage things long term as it messes up your body's natural rhythms, but needs must...

I have terrible IBS, made worse by certain foods and booze.

While on holiday in Japan I had lots of booze and food, had to sprint out a temple and the only toilet I could find was an old fashioned hole in the ground with nothing but the walls to hold on to.

That was a low point.

Hi everyone

I'm reading with interest and note that a few of you mention taking imodium or using plugs, I might be naive but how does this impact other symptoms? For example, I get the shakes, sweaty / clammy and horrendous stomach cramps. When my dr first diagnosed me I was given imodium but found that the symptoms were still there and the overpowering need to 'go' meant that I could no longer rush to the loo which would in turn subside the (doubled up) stomach cramps and sweats / shakes. How do you manage these symptoms? Mine dont seem to go if I take imodium, instead I just have continuous cramping and feel constipated.

Also, those that use incontinence pads or knickers. Are you able to smell or do other people notice if you have a leak? When my stomach is bad the smell is unbearable and I've not tried those knickers or pants as I fear everyone will still know.

Does anyone have any advice as to how to manage cramps? I take buscopan but the cramps hit like contraction pains. They occur in waves that peak (pain) then subside for 5 to 10 minutes before starting again. I have tried anti spasmodic pills but had little effect and painkillers dont seem to touch it.

Thank you for any advice, as awful as it sounds it's nice to know I'm not alone with this :)

I’ve got Crohn’s disease. I keep a potty, carrier bags, kitchen roll, toilet paper, wet wipes, anti-back wipes and mini air freshener in the car.

I’ve only needed to use it a couple of times but it gives me peace of mind that I can’t be caught short.

Line the potty with a carrier bag and kitchen roll, do your business (we’ve got blacked out windows but a sunscreen would give you privacy) and a big scarf over your lap. Wipe, bag it, double bag it, wipe potty and hands with the anti-back, spray of air freshener, windows open and you’re good to go. Find a bin or pop it in the boot (it won’t smell).

It's good to hear how it mentally affects other people. I've had so much anxiety over it since a teenager and always feel like I'm the only one.
I had one session of CBT and even she couldn't understand the fear. I remember her confused face and her saying "what do think will happen, that people will judge you?"
She didn't get it at all.
It's basically ruined my life as I can never go far. I can feel fine one minute and doubled over the next with no warning.
Because of this I have a huge fear of traffic jams, queues, basically any situation I can't get out of if I need to.

Because of this I have a huge fear of traffic jams, queues, basically any situation I can't get out of if I need to.

Me too. A couple of years ago my husband was working in Switzerland for a couple of weeks and the people he was working for took us to the mountains for a day out. I’d checked before that there were woods where we were walking on the mountain if push came to shove, and we went to the Alpine village on the train so that was ok. But then, horror or horrors, we had to go up the mountain in a cramped four person cable car. Even with incontinent pants there would have been no way of hiding an accident - to a pp, yes unfortunately the pants don’t hide the smell.
In the event it was fine but it’s things like that ruin what should be enjoyable events.

@Sugartits27

I think I have a pretty varied diet. In the last month I started slimming world so my diet is still varied but I've just cut a few things out. Typical day would be cereal or fruit at breakfast, lunch a salad and tea a big meal like pasta or curry and so on. I don't think I'm having too much or anything

When you've been seeing medics, have they asked you about your diet, or recommended a particular diet?

When I was first diagnosed with IBS I was told to increase the amount of fibre that I ate. This made my symptoms worse. When I reported that back to the consultant he shrugged and said 'oh yes, it does make it worse for some people'

It was only when I started following a low carb diet (to lose weight - nothing to do with IBS) that my symptoms vanished. That's when I realised that diet could play a major part in the whole thing. It's not the only factor - emotional stress can trigger an event, but I have had virtually no episodes since I cut the carbs right down.

... so - sorry! - in response to your post, I'd suggest that it might be worth looking at the amount of carbohydrate you're eating - cut down/out on the cereal/pasta/rice but get your carbs from veg/salad/fruit. Increase the protein and also the fat.

I’ve been caught out (dog walking, had to use the bushes and left my underwear behind)

The worst though was at the start of this happening to me. Invited to a special meal at a friend's House. I was asked to come early to help with food prep, set table etc. As you do, you might take a little taste from the foods you’re preparing. So I’d had some bacon and some sausage.

At the start of the meal I start bloating up - looking pregnant, pains in abdomen, sweating, headache etc. Had to go lay down. People thought I was drunk but hadn’t had a drink. Got so bad I went home mid-meal. friend was so angry with me. Huge explosion after I’d got home.

Previous I’d had various bouts of D and also constipation (sounds bizarre but sometimes both at same “sitting”), heart burn, rumbling tummy. But this was so painful it spurred me to see GP who referred for a colonoscopy where they removed 12 polyps and diagnosed diverticulitis. I think I have it down to culprits that cause me to have D - animal fat. So no sausage, chops of any kind, roast pork, steak, bacon etc. But sometimes I seem to get caught out and food will just seem to run through me.

I go now every few years for colonoscopy, slightly earlier if the symptoms start to cluster as there always seems to be more polyps.

Like PP, I try to keep an emergency kit with me of wipes, underwear, air freshener.

@BIWI it's interesting to read that because my latest big flare happened after having a very large pasta based meal. And not a lot else before that due to the diet. So maybe an overload of carbs on a pretty empty stomach was the culprit.

Worth a go, giving pasta a miss for a while. It took me a while to make the connection between carbs and the IBS, but it's definitely 'a thing' for me.

It could also be the wheat in pasta. I can only eat gluten free pasta/spaghetti. Worth a try maybe

Made the mistake of having bread and coronation chicken yesterday.

Really bad idea.

Now stuck inside for the day

On the school run I did once :( I lived 5 minutes walk away from school with no toilets on the way so just had to suck it up and walk home. It was horrific!

Thank you for starting this thread. It is so helpful to hear from other people as this can be such a taboo thing to talk about. I have fecal incontinence due to anal sphincter damage. It's supposed to be mild, just an accident every few weeks, but it has affected my life so much worrying about it and changing my image of myself. I take wipes and spare knickers with me but can't regularly take immodium due to rectocele sustained at birth as well. I'm told it will get worse when I hit the menopause. It happened during sex (I didn't even know until afterward) and my husband has not wanted sex since. It feels like I will not ever have sex again with either my husband or especially a new partner. I haven't ever read about that happening to anyone and this is the first time I have ever mentioned it. A lot of the time I feel that part of me, the woman I was before, has just disappeared, but then I try to get a grip and tell myself that I'm normal and it's just a once in a while occurrence. Going regularly every morning helps me to have confidence going out. And breaking these taboos down (and sucking it to any poo troll) has got to help I'm sure.

@LittleBusLotto
Your journey sounds similar to mine . I have certainly found the irrigation system ( Qufora) and the little silicone plugs ( Renew Inserts ) both on prescription very helpful .
I also had intensive physio once a week and exercises at home to train the muscles to help compensate the shattered sphincter.
My DH knew I was having problems but not how bad it had got and still does not know about the “ equipment” I have to use .
It’s so silly as we have been together nearly 50 years but faecal incontenence is somehow so hard to talk about even with our nearest and dearest .
I am so sorry you are not getting the support you need and deserve from your husband .

Have you tried keeping a diary to work out your triggers OP? My DD suffered from horrendous IBS that started with her GCSEs.

We have done a lot of work to discover her triggers, which seem to be stress related. However elimination has shown that food also plays a part: onions, apples, wheat and milk all make her much worse, though when her IBS is okay she can tolerate them in small quantities.

I honestly can't identify triggers. I know stress is a major one but food wise I can have an attack after carbs, salad, all different things. Beans are not great and nor is overly fatty food like fish and chips.

But I do believe that with me the main cause is stress and anxiety. I also have a weird thing where if I've had an attack in a certain place before I seem to get flare ups if I go there again. For example I once had an attack when I took my son swimming and now whenever we go to the swimming baths I feel a rumble. I know it sounds mad but it's definitely a psychological as well as physical issue with me.

I think triggers can be really hard to pinpoint. I can eat one food perfectly fine, then the next time end up on the loo straight after eating the same thing. I think mine is definitely more stress related. Any kind of trauma triggers a bad bout lasting months for me, like when my marriage broke down. In that time frame it then doesn’t matter what I do or don’t eat, I’ll be running to the loo regardless.

Since this thread has started I've seen a particularly violent return of my IBS symptoms which I thought were well under control, got caught short in the bathroom but not on the toilet, torn my anal fissure, and have a massively massively sore bum. I'd only saved the thread to not feel alone, I didn't realise it would mark a return in the symptoms! Awful awful weekend :(