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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To delete friend who has joined an MLM

482 replies

lastqueenofscotland · 16/09/2019 13:35

A lady I know from work has joined an MLM selling some sort of laxative coffee.
Her FB and instagram are covered in posts for it and about her promotions/trying to get a car etc etc.
She very much fits the profile of people they poach, she’s a SAHM and it’s been a squeeze of late for her.

I think MLMs are poisonous and I hate seeing her posts flogging this nonsense.
AIBU to remove her from my friend list

OP posts:
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5
riceuten · 17/09/2019 17:24

To the lady who doesnt like MLM companies. They are just women, mostly mums, who do not want to go out to work. They want to watch their child grown and earn money.

Let me take a wild guess and surmise you're into MLM...

purplebunny2012 · 17/09/2019 17:29

YANBU. MLMs are evil that just make the people at the top extremely rich

ShoshanaBlue101 · 17/09/2019 17:29

Laxative coffee
Sounds so much more fun than Avon. I can only just begin to imagine the sales party fun.

Oysterbabe · 17/09/2019 17:29

They are just women, mostly mums, who do not want to go out to work. They want to watch their child grown and earn money.

I get to watch my child grow because I can afford to feed them because I have an actual job that pays money.

Lucie83 · 17/09/2019 17:35

Wow talk about extreme, you are the definition of a fake friend.

How many times have you seen the KFC advert but you did not crack your television screen because you did not want to buy KFC.

MLM if you actually understood the marketing strategy allows ordinary people to make extraordinary amounts of money when their network actually has an open mind and are not typical sheep who think the only way to sell is via a shop (a company) in the top FTSE 100...

Reply me I’m with a question not an insult...!

Ginger1982 · 17/09/2019 17:37

@Lucie83 what do you sell?

YouokHun · 17/09/2019 17:37

They are just women, mostly mums, who do not want to go out to work. They want to watch their child grown and earn money

The level of time input for MLMers is pretty high. Zoom calls at all hours, trainings on-line at all hours, training off line at the Hun’s own expense somewhere inconvenient, CONventions in far flung grim hotels at weekends, constant attention on the iPhone, evening sales pitches and gatherings. So watching their child grow is pretty interrupted and they’re not really earning any money either, mostly they’re losing it (especially if they were to price up their time).

rubyroot · 17/09/2019 17:39

Wtf is an mlm

YouokHun · 17/09/2019 17:39

@Lucie83 what percentage make make above the national minimum wage in MLM? Interested in your expertise.

YouokHun · 17/09/2019 17:40

@rubyroot Multilevel marketing (sometimes known as network marketing): product or service based pyramid selling.

rubyroot · 17/09/2019 17:41

Is Avon an mlm. If so I can't see how it's evil.

ToftyAC · 17/09/2019 17:41

Yep - have had several friends who have done several MLM type businesses. Bored the shit out of me, but I just scrolled on by. I’ve found these ventures never last for long. I wouldn’t delete her if she IS a friend, but I would snooze her for now.

FastLane46 · 17/09/2019 17:42

Hey coffeequeen, MLM is all pyramid scheme, younique, herbalife, arbonne etc, all pyramid schemes that will cost you more than you earn. You will not get a car/holiday/whatever they say you can get because you will NEVER earn that amount, ever.

Oh, and the products they sell are shit!

BMW6 · 17/09/2019 17:43

Lucie83

You are fooling no-one but yourself.

gostiwooz · 17/09/2019 17:44

A friend of a friend does the Body Shop at home thing, and my friend has a party once or twice a year. Don't see friend all that often, so I go and usually buy a couple of things, but that's it.

Some random parent at one of dc's dance class workshops once mentioned aloe vera to me. Fortunately I'd been reading a thread much like this one not long before so I said that yes, I know it has marvellous properties, and actually I have one growing on my kitchen windowsill, but sadly I'm allergic to it. (I'm not but she believed my little white lie so its all good) The woman never spoke to me again (even better). Grin

Incidentally, I know a little bit about botany, and although products containing natural plant-based ingredients sound healthy, they are likely to be a specific chemical isolated and extracted from said plant (in effect, a drug), and in a much higher concentration than it would be if you ate the fruit or vegetable in question.

Also, many products contain a whole cocktail of plant extracts and although individually they might me harmless or have proven medicinal uses, in high enough concentration and in combination with one another... well, I wouldn't touch the stuff with a bargepole.

Would you buy an untested drug from a random person on the street that simultaneously caused hyperactivity, palpitations and sleeplessness, calmed you down again and made you relax, caused euphoria, suppressed your appetite and had diuretic and laxative effects?

Probably not.

YouokHun · 17/09/2019 17:44

Ruby, Avon used not to be but has now adopted the MLM model as it’s very lucrative for them. It’s not so lucrative for the new brand of ‘Avon Lady’. The market is totally saturated. On my local selling site nearly every post is someone desperately trying to recruit a down line. It’s now got the same problem as other MLMs have.

rubyroot · 17/09/2019 17:49

Ahhh okay so there's a on ladies making money out of other Avon ladies so the peeps at the bottom get fuck all? Is this the way bodysbop works too?

Still don't understand why you'd defriend someone though? Surely they're just desperate ti make a bit of money and if you don't like what they're selling you don't have to buy?

perfectstorm · 17/09/2019 17:52

To the lady who doesnt like MLM companies. They are just women, mostly mums, who do not want to go out to work. They want to watch their child grown and earn money.

That's precisely why I despise the companies, @CoffeeQueenOfHerts. The sums are very clear - the only people making any money are the handful at the top, and they make it by lying to a lot of women, to persuade them to spend a fortune on "an investment" that will never pay off. The women most tempted are likely to be those who know that childcare is astronomical and believe that it's a way they can manage to look after their kids, work, and if they just try hard enough they can build a fabulous lifestyle for their families. And there's this thing called the sunk costs fallacy, which means once people have been suckered into a scam, they don't want to admit it to themselves, let alone anyone else, so they'll spend more trying to salvage the situation. So they end up working incredibly hard, annoying all those close to them, to sell products in a completely saturated market that they themselves have wasted stupid amounts of money on. They are the customers. They will have almost no customers. Because the only people who benefit from MLM are the owners, and the first one or two levels below them.

Real businesses don't like competition. You don't find restaurants trying to persuade every customer to open another franchise on the same street. The reason people constantly need to recruit a 'team' is because that's where the sales lie - the 'team' buying their own pack of products to sell on, most of which will never go anywhere.

The sums on this are clear. If the people at the top of a company recruit six people below them, and then six people below that, by the time you've got thirteen layers of a team - which given most of these companies are US based to start with, is entirely possible - you'd exceed the world's global population. And that means you would need every man, woman and child, all trying to sell one another one specific brand of lipstick (or health drink, or cleaning products, or essential oil) and no other customers, and you STILL wouldn't have enough people in the world.

The only regular customer base are the reps. If you look at that logically, most must be losing money, because if you are the customers and you take more money in than you spend, then the company is bankrupt. And they aren't, which is more than can be sad for some of their reps.

It's a pyramid scam and should be criminalised. The fact they predate on women just wanting to believe that they can work and be a mum and still have a good life is one of the reasons what they do is so appalling. They're impoverishing women, while also encouraging them to alienate their friends and family and lying that they will find a luxury lifestyle if they just shell out enough at the start. It's pretty twisted. I have several acquaintances who got sucked into this when they had preschoolers. All have quietly dropped it now and gone back to real jobs instead. None of them speak kindly of the companies if you ask.

Anyone who's doing a MLM is being scammed. They are the con's mark. And it's an especially cruel scam because by the time they face that and bow out, those most badly burned, and so financially worst off, are highly likely to have infuriated a lot of the people around them, so the sympathy will be limited.

To delete friend who has joined an MLM
OtraCosaMariposa · 17/09/2019 17:54

MLM if you actually understood the marketing strategy allows ordinary people to make extraordinary amounts of money when their network actually has an open mind and are not typical sheep who think the only way to sell is via a shop (a company) in the top FTSE 100.

I don't even know where to start with this pile of tripe.

It's like MLM bingo. "Ordinary people" - tick "extraordinary amounts" - tick. "Open mind" - tick. "typical sheep" - tick.

It does not work. People who are telling you that they are making "extraordinary sums" are either lying, or right at the peak of the pyramid (and probably living in Utah). It's nothing to do with being closed-minded, or a sheep, or whatever other bollocks your upline is feeding you.

It's about having a basic level of reading comprehension, business sense, a bit of savvy, and having been around the block enough times to see people in these schemes fail time and time again.

Jack80 · 17/09/2019 17:56

I would unfollow and advise her of this bad company

sylviemc · 17/09/2019 17:57

To the lady who doesn't like MLM companies. They are just women, mostly mums, who do not want to go out to work. They want to watch their child grown and earn money.
this may be true but they are also engaged in pyramid selling which means someone will ultimately lose out bog time, all pyramid schemes ultimately collapse, in some parts of the world these schemes are banned or illegal because they cause such damage. The mums themselves might be genuine people but they have been hooked into a bad scheme which will bring a lot of heartache further down the line. It is another form of ponzi scheme. If you value your friend at all advise her against any more investment on her part. It is easy to get hooked - i nearly did once and it only cost me £400 which was nearly thirty years ago now - but that was a lot of money for me then and still is. Bad move

Benes · 17/09/2019 17:58

Lucie I have a number of marketing qualifications and have worked in marketing. MLMs are the biggest scam going and incredibly unethical to boot.
But you're welcome to prove me wrong if you can....

YouokHun · 17/09/2019 17:58

Ruby, that’s about the size of it and you can include Body Shop at Home too. There’s a perception that if the people are not pushy and the product is OK then MLM is not that bad but it’s not really a logical conclusion to draw when so many (over 99%) are losing.

PerfectStorm amen to that.

DurhamDurham · 17/09/2019 17:59

My 17 year old niece has started selling Bodyshop products, it's a two pronged attack as my sister in law is trying to guilt the whole family in buying all our Christmas presents from her daughter. The fact that not everyone wants a Bodyshop present appears to be completely besides the point,

I have asked if my niece intends to get a proper job at some point, just so I know how long I have to avoid them for Grin

Loubylouchirino · 17/09/2019 18:02

I’d like to think we have the same friend, but unfortunately it seems to be coming so common. My friend worked with me, then left to become a SAHM and now sells coffee. She posts ‘progress pics’ that don’t look different from when she started and apparently is on track to achieve platinum status or whatever and that comes with a car. She posts endlessly about this ‘wonder drink’ and her fri-pay. She’s a lovely person normally so I’ve muted her for now.