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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that, yes, people who rent like nice things too...

134 replies

Everythingnotsavedwillbelost · 15/09/2019 11:07

I rent, I have done for years and at the moment it’s likely to continue. I have lovely furniture, my kids have lovely bedrooms & our life is normal and like everyone else’s.

Parent at the school last week ‘what, you own your own furniture when you rent?’

Aibu to think what the actual fuck? She clearly was amazed that as someone who rents a house, I might own furniture and shock horror, buy nice things?!

I just missed the boat housing wise because I don’t have a deposit & despite trying to save, can’t get a big enough mortgage.

Aibu to also think that this country’s perception of renters is so warped and out of date and actually just bloody rude Hmm

OP posts:
swingofthings · 15/09/2019 12:40

My tenants have much nicer furniture than we do. We probably should replace ours, but it's not a priority to us.

No relevance whether you are renting or owning.

stopgaphere · 15/09/2019 12:45

We rent. We also enjoy a lot of luxuries (luxury cars, nice clothes, at least one long haul trip a year, eat out lots etc). Our flat is larger than the average property but Our rent is about half of what a mortgage payment on the same property would be. We also don’t want to take the risk of being tied to a property which is inconvenient to us in the future. A lot of people just don’t want to pay stupid amounts of interest and tie up their capital in an asset which needs maintaining and has a fundamentally unstable value with the added risk of being difficult to dispose of. I would buy a house in cash if I really loved it. I would also consider a mortgage on an investment property if the numbers were right. But I would never have a mortgage on a property that I live in again.
Outrageous, you obviously don't work hard enough. Now get saving and be miserable for 20 years so you pay off that mortgage.
Jokes aside I agree. I prefer to rent , I can't buy where I want to live and I would rather rent here than buy elsewhere. My kids and I have a better standard of living. Once they have flown the nest I'll buy a bedsit.(in the are I live in)

Stroller15 · 15/09/2019 12:45

YANBU OP. I also get that, renting after 35. I wish my parents gave me some inheritance so I can buy my own house. One friend actually said she feels so, so sorry for me to hear we are still renting with 2 DC's. Despite our house being in a lovely location, much bigger and the rent cheaper than their mortgage. I was astonished by the snobbery disguised as sympathy.

CoinOperatedBoy · 15/09/2019 12:46

Also, the ‘why don’t you buy your own house’ comments. Never ending.

A lot of the snobbery comes from people who were just handed a house too. Or given a LOT of financial help.

Someone I know, her grandma died and she inherited the full value of the house when it was sold. She's made comments such as "ugh no, renting is for chavs and students".

I don't get quite so riled if it's from people who have worked their backsides off to get one themselves. But it's still all down to luck. They still had the opportunity to. Their health and circumstances allowed them to. Sooooo many reasons why people cannot get a mortgage.

funinthesun19 · 15/09/2019 12:46

People think those in council houses don’t deserve to live in comfort and should have the very basics. A kitchen that’s falling apart is what they deserve etc...

All because people who have got mortgages can’t always afford to make their houses nicer. Well, I hate to sound blunt but that’s nobody else’s problem that you can’t afford a new kitchen and your home is your own responsibility. You chose that life.

It’s like when there are new housing developments and some are council/housing association owned and the home owners complain that it’s not fair. Well you chose to buy one! Nobody held a gun to your head. Move if you don’t like it.

Sotiredofthislife · 15/09/2019 12:47

Many people’s experience of renting is as a student or young person when it is normal to rent a furnished property. It is not unreasonable to consider that people renting longer term may use furniture provided as part of a rental arrangement.

You are being sensitive and unreasonable to suggest just because someone didn’t realise your situation, she considered she was better than you.

GiveMeHope103 · 15/09/2019 12:49

Yanbu theres nothing wrong with renting. The only thing I would think of is spending money on a place that isnt yours. We grew up renting and when we moved we had furniture, appliances etc that suited that place and we moved it was a problem to fit that into somewhere else and feel like home .
For me, owning my home was important as I wanted to invest in something that was mine.

PettyContractor · 15/09/2019 12:54

She was surprised that you owned furniture, there's nothing in your description to imply that she was surprised that you own nice furniture. Unless you are assuming that furnished rentals always contain horrible furniture, and everyone knows that?

I think you have jumped to a completely unjustified conclusion.

Thecabbageassasin · 15/09/2019 12:54

@Butchyrestingface. The comment was tongue in cheek. I am aware that people rent for many reasons.

Gwenhwyfar · 15/09/2019 13:02

"Unless you are assuming that furnished rentals always contain horrible furniture,"

It's the case where I live unfortunately.

Petrichor11 · 15/09/2019 13:04

I’ve rented for years and only ever really see fully furnished places. Possibly depends on the type of property. I would guess family houses are more likely to come unfurnished than one bedroom flats?

It depends how she said it. If it was just surprised then I’d assume her only experience of renting was fully furnished and YABabitU . If it was sneery then YANBU.

Gwenhwyfar · 15/09/2019 13:06

"You do realise that "the continent" covers a variety of countries and cultures and for some of them being a home owner is the most common thing to be"

OK, a generalisation. I actually lived in a country totally obsessed with home owning and building your own home, but renting was still more accepted than here.

Dowser · 15/09/2019 13:06

My renters have turned my rental home into a beautiful place to live
At one point it was far nicer than mine despite me telling them they shouldn’t go changing doors, fireplaces, flooring etc and it was only a rental home.

What do you do if thats how they want to spend their money.

Oh yes and after paying a plasterer and a painter to paint the house, they put up wallpaper 😡

Gwenhwyfar · 15/09/2019 13:07

"We grew up renting and when we moved we had furniture, appliances etc that suited that place and we moved it was a problem to fit that into somewhere else and feel like home ."

This is exactly the same when a homeowner moves.

Gwenhwyfar · 15/09/2019 13:09

"not buying things beyond the essential."

I'd consider most furniture to be essential.

BrendasUmbrella · 15/09/2019 13:11

She probably rented a furnished house before, that's all.

Starrynights86 · 15/09/2019 13:11

We thought we had a lovely landlord who turned into a bit of an arse when she decided to sell (lying that real estate agents were tradespeople when getting a valuation for example). She genuinely thought we were stupid and inferior to her because we were renting I think. I think a lot of people think that about renters, too dumb to own their own homes so clearly too dumb to own furniture too!

PuffHuffle5 · 15/09/2019 13:13

Aibu to think what the actual fuck?

No - she’s either being a snidey snob or a complete moron.

DDIJ · 15/09/2019 13:14

This reply has been withdrawn

Message from MNHQ: This post has been withdrawn

Userzzzzz · 15/09/2019 13:15

She might have just been sheltered and genuinely surprised. Everywhere I rented was fully furnished and we deliberately didn’t want to buy nice things until we bought our own place. The difference is I know lots of people do rent i the longer term m so wouldn’t say anything stupid.

PuffHuffle5 · 15/09/2019 13:15

She probably rented a furnished house before, that's all.

I’ve been a lodger in a furnished room - that doesn’t mean I don’t know rented accommodation, especially a whole house or flat, often (probably more often than not) is not furnished. What planet has this woman been living on??

Greysmanicfan41 · 15/09/2019 13:16

My tenants have made my property amazing
And I loved the fact they made it their home!

KennDodd · 15/09/2019 13:17

Well I own and my furniture is a load of old tat.

Hellofromtheotterslide · 15/09/2019 13:20

My tenants have much nicer furniture than me but so what? At the end of the day, the only difference between them and me is that I was lucky enough to get onto the property ladder before things went crazy. Why would I begrudge the way that people spend their money? As long as they look after the flat that's their home and pay their rent on time, it's non of my business.

Jenasaurus · 15/09/2019 13:21

I'd consider most furniture to be optional. I need something to sleep on but that's because I am fat.

Does that mean slim people sleep on the floor.