To think that, yes, people who rent like nice things too...

[Everythingnotsavedwillbelost]

I rent, I have done for years and at the moment it’s likely to continue. I have lovely furniture, my kids have lovely bedrooms & our life is normal and like everyone else’s.

Parent at the school last week ‘what, you own your own furniture when you rent?’

Aibu to think what the actual fuck? She clearly was amazed that as someone who rents a house, I might own furniture and shock horror, buy nice things?!

I just missed the boat housing wise because I don’t have a deposit & despite trying to save, can’t get a big enough mortgage.

Aibu to also think that this country’s perception of renters is so warped and out of date and actually just bloody rude

I think you've made quite a big leap from her mistakenly thinking all rental properties come fully furnished (a bit daft maybe, but it may be her only experience of renting as most student/short term lets are furnished) to assuming that she's a snob. She was a bit tactless but I don't see how what she said is in any way a suggestion that people who rent don't like 'nice things'.

When DH and I were first renting, my mum was very put out that we were buying 'nice, new' things such as cutlery, pots and pans, furniture, because "you are only renting! Why do you need everything new when you're only renting?"

She thought that because we were renting we should just have hand me downs/charity item goods, I don't understand her thinking to this day!

Most of the couples I know (we're all early 30's) were gifted money for a deposit for a mortgage - usually from their parents. Or it was inheritance. Or a big loan from somebody.

I haven't had access to money like that. It doesn't make them any better or any more hard working than me.

Some people have never rented and have parents who also never rented so genuinely have little to no experience with renters especially if they live in an echo chamber with friends similar to them too.

We were renting until we were well in to our 40s, mainly because we couldn't get the exorbitant amount needed for a deposit in London (despite there being two of us, with well above the average London salary).

We definitely came across this attitude, but just gave those people a wide berth and stuck with people who were more progressive/less judgemental. I think the result is we have nicer friends, so it's worked well for us

Think of it as the opposite of virtue signalling - they're (however subliminally) signalling their non-virtue so you don't have to hang out with them.

Fewer and fewer people can afford to buy, so this attitude is on it's way out luckily!

Maybe she cant believe you can afford your own furniture, if you're so poor that you have to rent.

Being unable to buy is not necessarily the reason people rent. I can afford to buy but am choosing to rent at the moment due to circumstances.

Our property manager at the first inspection, in tones of great astonishment said 'you've got the place nicer than the owners had it'. . . I did have a bit of a chuckle.

We always had our own furniture too - got tired of having to put up with furniture the landlords supplied, which was always the cheapest they could come up with.

Maybe she cant believe you can afford your own furniture, if you're so poor that you have to rent.

that's such an MN way of thinking. Many of us live in areas where rents are everything but cheap. Pretty sure the range of properties to rent across the entire country goes up to very luxurious places too, why do MN always assume that tenants go for the cheapest property available?

It depends where you live. Where I live, most rentals are furnished. I had to look hard to find an unfurnished place.
On the other hand, a friend said his dad, who is a landlord, considers all renters to be 'feckless' and there'd definitely a bit of a stigma about renting past about 30 or 35. On the continent, it would be totally normal, but over here you're supposed to be living in a really boring suburban house with a garden by the time you're 30 even if you're single. It's silly.

I think some confusion Over what a mortgage is here.

The person who legally owns a property is the person whose name is on the title deeds.
A mortgage is a loan. It's a loan to be paid over a period of time. To secure that loan a charge is taken on the property. So if the loan was defaulted on, then the property coild legally be forced to sale to repay the debt.
It doesn't mean the mortgage company own the property.
Mortgages come in all percentages. For example ours is 20 percent of the value.
Legally we own the house. If however we could not repay our mortgage , or loan , if it makes it easier to understand, the mortgage company could force a sale to get their money back as we have used the property itself as security.
They would be entitled to what they are owed on the loan. They would not be entitled to the property nor its full value.

So legally yes you own the house if you have a mortgage. Paying off your mortgage doesn't mean you suddenly own it, you've always owned it. Simply it means you've paid off the loan and the charge on the property is cancelled.

And op, I don't think this woman's comment means people look down on renters, more simply she would have likely just assumed rentals came fully furnished

People make a lot of assumptions OP, I purchased a maisonette in a block where mostly its 40/60 council owned people all assume I am a council tenant when I give my address, I don't worry what they think, there is nothing wrong in council properties by the way, just showing that peoples perception of things and reality is often misjudged.

It all boils down to people assuming people who rent are lazy, have no ambition, like a very basic life etc... All because they don’t have a mortgage. It’s all utter bollocks.

Then if it’s a council tenant it’s all the above plus the assumption they “don’t work” “get everything free”. Again, all bollocks.

A mortgage is nice but if you lose your job you will be fucked more than a person who rents would be. And then if you lose your home you’ll be renting like the people you looked down on.

"We always had our own furniture too - got tired of having to put up with furniture the landlords supplied, which was always the cheapest they could come up with."

I just assumed that because I have my own furniture, I have to find an unfurnished place. How easy is it to get the landlord to move their own furniture out? Wouldn't this be a hassle for them as they'd need storage for it until the next tenant?

definitely a bit of a stigma about renting past about 30 or 35. On the continent, it would be totally normal

Another MN

You do realise that "the continent" covers a variety of countries and cultures and for some of them being a home owner is the most common thing to be, and people rarely rent unless abroad?

Homeownership is outdated. We need to move now , more than before for jobs, as work is no longer secure
Soon only the very wealthy will own again and we will all rent, and not only houses. I think it will be the norm in the future to rent cars, tools etc instead of buying as we move towards being more enviromentally concious.

How odd! Usually its just houseshares that are furnished. The majority of rentals are unfurnished but usually(not always!) come with white goods. How old are they? I'm wondering how far into life a person can get through without know that...
Almost everyone I know are renters, I didn't realise there was any sort of perception about renters. Council tenants I know there is(although largely untrue in reality!), but didn't realise anyone thought anything negative about private renters! Total nonsense, ignore anyone who thinks otherwise, they're in the minority!
Of course renters like nice things...! Very odd to think otherwise, never would of crossed my mind something would think they wouldn't!

I've lived in 5 different rentals before buying my current house. In all instances of renting, the landlord was supposedly happy to rent unfurnished. In none of the houses I rented did they actually end up removing the crappy furniture left behind by themselves/the previous tenants despite numerous requests. Not sure whether that's a common occurence or if I've just been unlucky. It was less hassle to just make do with what was there already, whilst resenting paying to store someone else's tat. Even when I eventually bought they left behind a ton of furniture which wasn't agreed on, beds, wardrobes, you name it.

I also don't understand where the "continent" is, but in most European countries the majority of homes are owned. The percentage differs per country but in general the majority are owned as opposed to rented.

I think the attitude is that you should be saving every spare penny for a deposit to get on the property ladder, not buying things beyond the essential. For some people it really is the be all and end all.

YANBU. Renters get treated like shit and especially on MN. 'It's not your house'. 'Landlord can do that because it's his house!' 'If you don't like it then buy your own house.'

People in the uk are obsessed with property and there is a snobbery regarding renting. Nowhere else in Europe has the same attitude. The way I see it now most people who pay off their mortgage will just lose the house to care home fees in the future. The days of passing property down to your children when you die are gone for most.

timshelthechoice
pointing out that you are not free to make big changes in a property that is not yours is not treating someone like shit.

Would you really consider it reasonable for a tenant to paint the bathroom tiles, knock down an internal partition, get rid of a door they don't like and putting a pond! in the garden and so on? (all real cases btw).

We put a new kitchen in out Council House. My mother never stopped going on about it. She thought we should put up with the one totally unsuited to our needs and falling to bits.

When I said, it is just the same as wallpapering ,painting, and keeping the garden nice, she said she would not do that either.

Also, the ‘why don’t you buy your own house’ comments. Never ending.