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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think owning a dog is selfish?

222 replies

hannadashery · 13/09/2019 16:04

...with the exception of working dogs or as companions for retired people.

The majority of dog owners work, so in a 24 hour period in which their owner spends the majority of time sleeping or at work, a dog will be very lucky to get 3hrs walking a day and will probably spend the rest of the time bored/sleeping.

I don't believe dogs enjoy Netflix programs and highly doubt their owners are constantly hugging/petting them every evening. It feels that dogs sole purpose is to pad out that free time the owners have in between all their other activities. And sure dogs love their owners because who's going to hate the person that feeds them and provides temporary reprieve from absolute boredom.

Expecting an absolute flaming as so many people own dogs but from a non pet owners perspective it seems majority of dogs are basically slaves and are blissfully ignorant of their predicament.

Just thought I'd throw that as a light-hearted discussion on a Friday afternoon Smile

OP posts:
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Barbarafromblackpool · 13/09/2019 17:44

I was just reading the rubbish/recycling thread and there was a bit of a discussion about cat litter and what to do with it, how it can't go in the compost bin and it occurred to me that cats aren't very environmentally friendly, especially when you consider they eat meat.

loveyouradvice · 13/09/2019 17:45

Age 9 my daughter was pretty shocked to discover that "it's a dog's life" meant having a really tough time....

She thought it meant just the opposite! Nothing but playing, chilling, eating and cuddling all day with zero homework!

Lipz · 13/09/2019 17:45

a dog will be very lucky to get 3hrs walking a day

I don't think there are many who walks their dog(s) 3 hours a day.

Everyone around me has dogs, we don't as I know how much work goes into them having grown up with dogs and I couldn't give them the time they need.

All the house aroud me leave their dogs out in the back garden, there are very few people who are SAHP, I see the cars going out from 6.30am and back after 7/8pm at night. As I am living beside them, I hear the dogs barking constantly.

The yoke woman beside me works Monday to friday, she has 3 dogs, 8 cats, they live in the garden and house, she actually leaves the back door open and lets them run in and out, she had her garden reduced in size due to building a shed the size of the Taj Mahal ! so very little room for them to run around, especially when you take into consideration the trampoline, table and chairs, built in planters, swing and slide set and the sand pit that takes over alot of the garden. She walks her dogs once a week on a Saturday for approx 1 hour. I have contacted the dog warden as I felt it was cruel but was swiftly informed that the pets are well cared for and once they have food and water left for them there is no amount of time that you are only allowed to leave a dog and once they have a small space to move around they are OK, this is Ireland so not sure if the same in UK. I do feel terrible sorry for the dogs but the dog wardens know best and they feel the dogs are happy.

Personally I feel if you get a pet that requires alot of walking, exercise and care you shouldn't get one. My parents when alive treated their dogs like humans, the legs would be walked off them, they were brought to dog parks, they brought them on days out, they went on holidays with them, so there are people who are fantastic with dogs and there are also some people who work and make sure their dog is checked on regularly, they may pop home from work or they don't work terribly ling hours.

I do think that some people need assessing before getting a dog, I know alot of people who should not be near any animal. BUt there are also some wonderful caring dog owners out there.

LoreleiRock · 13/09/2019 17:45

Some dogs don’t need much exercise. My dog can go out in the garden on his own, or if my DH is home he has multiple short walks per day, or he sometimes comes to my office with me. He sleeps with someone every night. He is a rescue and had a terrible terrible first few years of life. I don’t think I am selfish at all, he is loved and he is happy. Very very happy.

tabulahrasa · 13/09/2019 17:46

“If most full-time working owners paid for dog walkers every day thered be way more dog walking businesses than there are.”

Would there? There’s not exactly a shortage of them... I know of 4 dogwalkers within a mile of me in a fairly small town, and 3 doggy daycare centres within a 15 minute drive and I’m not even looking for one, so I assume there are actually a lot more than that.

But as well as retired people and part time people there are parents at home with children and people who work different hours to the other adults in their house.

There’s 4 adults in my house (2 are technically my children) 3 work, 2 are students (1 does both, lol) my house is empty for about an hour twice a week...

MaryBerriesNiece · 13/09/2019 17:48

It’s incredibly selfish to own a hearing dog/guide dog/or any type of assistance dogs. 🙄. OP I do believe you started this thread to be a GF!

Blue7 · 13/09/2019 17:48

Where do you get jumped on and accosted by random dogs?

I feel really sorry for my pair when I go off to work. They can sleep or play or eat or drink while I go out and earn money.

dottiedodah · 13/09/2019 17:50

I am a dog owner and am at home full time.I agree that dogs should not be left for long periods ,but 4 hours or so is fine .I used to work 3 mornings a week with my old dog and would take him out as soon as I got home!.If no one worked .if they had a dog how could they pay for his upkeep food /vet bills and so on ?

Scarletoharaseyebrows · 13/09/2019 17:50

I'm not a fan of horses but I don't think nobody else should own them.

Are you this intolerant in all aspects of your life, OP? You're coming over quite dictatorial.

WiddlinDiddlin · 13/09/2019 17:51

*So what? Does this impact YOU in any way?

It does when I can't go for a stroll without stepping in dog shite or getting accosted by one of these dogs*

Ahh I see.

You hate dogs and think all dog owners are the same.

We aren't you know. I don't like stepping or rolling through dog shit either, nor do I like being jumped on by strange dogs.

In fact, I work with dogs and I STILL do not like being jumped on or run up to, by strange dogs.

The issue however, isn't dogs, or even dog owners.

It's selfish inconsiderate people who are the issue.

Goodmoaning1980 · 13/09/2019 17:51

Oh for god sake get over yourself and keep your opinions to yourself. It's not selfish at all. I work part time as long as you walk them and love them there's no problem. My dog is perfectly happy thank you very much

Crimebustersofthesea · 13/09/2019 17:51

You do know all dogs owners aren't the same don't you OP? In the same way all parents aren't the same?

I pick up my dogs shit and he's never jumped up at anyone.

You really are just a goady fucker aren't you.

SoyDora · 13/09/2019 17:54

I also hate those things OP (navigating dog shit and dogs jumping up at me). I have a dog. I clean up his shit and don’t let him jump up anyone.

Carpathian2 · 13/09/2019 17:56

You seem to have a very cold view of life op. Confused

EdersonsSmileyTattoo · 13/09/2019 17:59

It entirely depends on the owner.

There is only one dog owner in our family (SIL) and she shouldn’t own a pet if any description! She has a lovely little dog, but the poor thing never gets taken for a walk, he gets left on his own for long periods, she goes away and palms him off on anyone who’ll have him.

I feel so sorry for him, and yes I have told her she’s bang out of order, We’d have him ourselves if we didn’t have four cats!

Crazyladee · 13/09/2019 17:59

Think what you like. Shrug.

We love our dogs unconditionally and I know they love us unconditionally too. They give us so much love and pleasure; they have given hugs and licked tears through some very tough times. In return, they are very well loved and cared for, walked twice a day come what may, we make sure they get the best veterinary care, best quality food, and generally spoilt rotten. Life is short and I believe you need to make the most of life's pleasures. In fact, I don't even know why I'm wasting ten minutes of mine responding to such a mean spirited, goady post.

ThirstyGhost · 13/09/2019 17:59

"You really are just a goady fucker aren't you."

You have to be at least a little bit smart or funny to be adequately goady on here though.

motherheroic · 13/09/2019 18:01

My dog is a rescue so he already existed. It's not like I was on a waiting list for another batch of puppies to be pumped out.

Pretty sure he prefers being with a selfish owner rather then his concrete cell at the shelter.

DiBPD1979 · 13/09/2019 18:04

When I had my Loki, I walked him an hour and a half before work, then dog person walked him for an hour and a half, then I walked him one hour before settling in for the evening, with lots of attention. I got him, as selfishly, wanted a dog. He was an amazing pooch and had a great life.

MouseInATelescope · 13/09/2019 18:05

As long as the owners love the dog enough to walk him/her as regularly as they can, and feed them a good diet... showing love every day I think it's fine. What's the alternative? They'd all be put down, or in cold, damp cages in rescue centres, fed on the cheapest food. Compared to those dogs, a dog of a couple working FT has a luxury life. Walking that dog once a day, getting to curl up in front of the fire in the winter. Treats. Cuddles.

NKFell · 13/09/2019 18:05

All these sweeping generalisations are bonkers.

Yes, of course dogs shouldn't be left alone for too long and decent dog owners don't do this. The arguing about sleep doesn't hold up in real life either, my dogs swim most mornings and evenings and are super fit BUT, given half the chance they'd sit on the sofa snuggled up snoozing all day.

StressyDressyHeels · 13/09/2019 18:12

YABU to assume dogs want patting all day long.

Many dogs are working dogs and actually want to be busy. Not sat on the sofa snuggled up.

Principally yes, owning a dog is selfish. It’s to satisfy the persons wants not the dogs really. But you’re reasoning is flawed.

user1471453601 · 13/09/2019 18:12

So, my family took a dog from a rescue centre. I asked if she was motivated by food and/or toys. I was told neither appeared to interest her.

15 months later, I swear she is part Ganet. If there is food about, so is she. And she loves her squeaky toys more than her food.

Do I conclude that we were selfish to rescue her? Or do I conclude that she was depressed in the kennels?

We are a family of three adults, one retired, one works a fairly conventional 9 to.5 and the third is out of the house for 5/6 hours a day.

Darling dog is rarely left for more of more than three hours.

I think the relationship is reciprocal. She gets lots of attention hugs and walks. We get lots and affection and an animal who is v v vocal if someone comes into our premises.

Win win in my book

TubaTwoLocusts · 13/09/2019 18:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Zaphodsotherhead · 13/09/2019 18:18

I work variable hours. Some days I work 4 hours, some days it's nine. DDog gets a five mile run before I go, then she's left to get on with her day until I come home.

She's remarkably okay with the lack of routine and being left alone. She hides under the sofa throws and sleeps and is frequently astonished to see me when I come back from a shorter shift and have to poke her awake for a walk. And she's a high energy working breed.

Who full well knows how loved and cossetted she is and milks it mercilessly. But if I find another dead mouse buried in the sofa cushions, I am going to...to...oh hell, I'll probably just cuddle her anyway.