To think that it's shameful that England (I think Scotland does) won't recognise common law marriage?

[Rainbowhairdontcare]

I've never understood why that's the case. Some States in the US do, the same as Canada and even some Latin American countries. Given the statistics of cohabitation it would only make sense?

But nobody can guarantee we'll stay married forever, why would I want to share my inheritance with someone just because?

If you are no longer married then they would no longer share your inheritance.

I don’t understand why you want this given your last post

I’m so glad it’s not the case here

Then separation of assets should be recognised. Surely people getting into relationships after divorce but with children would appreciate that.

Prenups are not legally binding either (another part I don't get).

I think YABU. People who want to get married for the benefits of marriage get married. People who want to live together and not get married for the benefits (or lack of) wont. You would be forcing people who have chosen to get married into a contract they have not agreed too. If there are issues around death and inheritance then surely it's easier to make a will?

But nobody can guarantee we'll stay married forever, why would I want to share my inheritance with someone just because?

So? That’s the chance you take. If you are that concerned about inheritance, couldn’t you state that in a pre-nup? Or do those not exist in the U.K.?

Can’t you do a will to cover this

@Fairenuff they do if received during marriage. That happened to me.

marraige by habit and repute still applies to an incredibly unusual set of circumstances - according to S3 of the Family Law (Scotland) Act

This is technically true, but it's not a form of marriage still available to people now.

The circumstances in which it isn't abolished are:

• couples who were in a marriage by habit and repute before the commencement of the 2006 Act and continue to be in it after commencement.

• couples where a marriage took place outside of the UK, the couple purported to live together as a married couple, one person in the marriage dies, and it subsequently transpires that the marriage which took place outside of the UK wasn't valid. In those circumstances, the couple's marriage isn't considered illegitimate.

So while there may still be some couples who are married by habit and repute due to their circumstances being as described above, this form of marriage has now been abolished and no new marriages of this type can be formed.

Yabu

I've name changed as very outing. BC in Canada recognises common law for cohabitees in terms of property rights. The intention was to protect kids of nonmarried parents. All very admirable.

BUT I have a friend who lived with his partner. He put up all the money to buy a house, paid the mortgage and supported her for years. She didn't work. No kids (she didn't want them - he did), no marriage (she didn't want to, he did). They ended up splitting due to her infidelity. He has to buy out her interest in the property that she never paid into because after you've lived together for a certain amount of time you're treated as if you were married (even though she didn't want to get married). It's a shitty situation for him.

So, I reckon if you want to be recognised as a couple get married (or get a cp when that becomes available to hetro couples), but don't expect all the protection that that entails if you don't make an active choice to have it.

• chosen NOT to get married- sorry missed that out in my previous post!

It's sounds a little like you want only certain parts of marriage to apply to common law.

It sounds a little bit like you only want your partner to have some of the protection marriage gives.

If the rights of marriage applied to people who'd lived together for x amount of time then he'd be entitled to your assent and whatever would be legally divided in a divorce.

Or do you mean you want the freedom to split and not share anything but the protection of his inheriting everything should you die and are still together.

A will would solve that and if he's that important to you a bit of a hassle isn't a big deal for the peace of mind knowing your assets will go where you want them too.

I'm in Scotland, and in almost 60 years I have known only one couple "married by habit and repute" who would have qualified under our laws. I only found out they weren't married the day they actually tied the knot!

Friends of my parents did this they had kids (my age) and grandkids she even called herself Mrs...

Have a civil partnership rather than a marriage if you don't want to get married.

@phoenix prenups are up to the judge to be recognised. Mine wasn't, so I had to share my inheritance and my percentage of equity in the house was lowered to 50% for the same reason.

Remain unmarried and a will for inheritance

Marriage should be an opt-in system. Otherwise you’d have couples having to opt OUT.

Yes, I came here to say this. I think an opt-in approach to relationships is probably preferable.

Judgy

Or do you mean you want the freedom to split and not share anything but the protection of his inheriting everything should you die and are still together.

This exactly ^^

I think if you're a single woman without DC there isn't any benefit to marriage.

Your long term partner gets ill and is unconscious in hospital, with you at his bedside. Then his sister, who neither of you like, turns up. She's his next of kin, she can tell the staff she doesn't want you there, and she can take over all the decisions about his treatment.

Of course there's a point to marriage even if you don't have DC

Prenups are not legally binding either

They can be. As long as they are considered fair and both parties had access to independent legal advice before signing, they will usually be upheld.

No way!

If you want marital rights - get married!

Many people actively don't want to get married so I don't think those rights should be effectively forced on them because they chose to co-habit.

YABU - if you want the advantages of being legally married you need to get married.

The only time I wish unmarried, but long-term, partners could be given the same rights as a spouse is with medical situations. When my aunt was involved in a serious accident and was in intensive care her partner of 37 years wasn't allowed to be with her because they weren't married. We made sure he had a say (through us) in her care, but until she was conscious and able to demand his presence the hospital refused to admit him to the ward.

Marriage is not something that should be drifted into because you've lived together for a certain number of years. The legal consequences of marriage are serious and people shouldn't suddenly have them imposed because of a long period of co-habitation, they need to be something that a couple have actively decided that they want.

Where a couple have cohabited for many years and the inheritance rules would cause hardship there is legal provision for a claim to financial support as a result of previous financial dependency. There is also the option for both spouses to do the responsible thing and write a will.

So don't get married but make wills. It really isn't that difficult. You can change wills whenever you feel like, without telling the other party .