To leave my baby in the car by herself to sleep

[margaritaproblems]

It feels like I am but I don't know 🤷‍♀️
We live in a very quiet cul de sac. Baby is 6 months old and was asleep when we got back so we have let her finish her sleep alone in the car.

Context
We also have a bouncy 4 yo that keeps disturbing her naps so she will nap better away from her.

The car is on the driveway, in full view.

I have left the drivers door wide open so I can hear her if she cries, I have my front windows and door wide open too. I am sat with dd inside, but tv is off while she is colouring in so I can hear.

Although baby is in the car she is only actually about 10ft away from where I am sat.

I can't actually see baby, but I can hear if she cries, and I can't actually see her having all of her nap inside if she was inside anyway as she naps in her pram bassinet so it's not that different, but it feels so alien,
I think because we have only lived here around a year and I could never have done this where we lived before, but if iabu then I won't do it again.

Personally, not a chance in hell I'd do that!! Why can't you take the baby in their car seat & put them in the house in a quiet room away from 4yr old?? I'd possibly leave them sleeping in a pram/pushchair in a private, locked, rear garden, as close to the house as possible, but that would be it!!

It's probably going to be ok but I personally wouldn't risk it after reading horror stories about urban foxes etc.

Lumene, OP has already said she has an adjustable lie flat car seat. Baby was in lie flat position, so no increased risk.

I think this is dumb to do and irresponsible, tbh. Too many risk factors and there's no way you were staring out the window the whole time. So exaggerating it to make it sound less unsafe is pointless. It also doesn't matter where you live- plenty of cars have been stolen in broad daylight in well to do areas. Similarly, risks like cats and wasps isn't worth it.

I did this today with my 9 month old let him finish his nap for his sake not mine hes his own worst enemy when hes over tired move him within a inch and his eyes are wired to instantly open 😂 i also live on a quite cul de sac car right in front of window locked the car with window down and kept checking on him we are all parents with different ways of doing stuff doesnt make us a bad parent because we dont all do stuff the same some of these posts are way over the top like the car rolling in the river im sure if your gonna leave baby to sleep your gonna make sure the handbreaks on also people saying they wouldnt leave baby in longer then half hour im sure youve been on longer shopping trips and havent repeatedly taken baby out all newborns sleep 90% of the time.. the choking yes but we leave our children sleeping in other rooms so we aint watching them 24/7 and well the cars setting on fire can happen sitting in traffic so surely we should all throw our keys away and walk? No matter what we all do everyones gonna have their own opinion and thats fine but dont over exaggerate and make her feel like shes done something criminal

For people banging on about handbags and purses, you wouldn't be watching the car the whole time with a purse in there. Why would you?

If the OP says she is watching the car and can see if anyone is on the street, can hear the baby, is 10ft away, AND has the car door open, then i think all this talk of kidnap is ridiculous.

I did this - but had very secure parking.

I would lock the car which would of course set the alarm, and go and do chores.

Then, as the baby started stirring, my babysitter car alarm would go and I would arrive just as the children woke up. They must have thought I was magical, that I was always there when they woke up!

I wouldn't do this. I know others who have done it without incident. But my gut doesn't feel its safe so I always brought DD in the house and if she woke up, then she woke up.

Security - locked car
Alert service - alarm going off as the baby starts waking and moving.

What's not to like and where are the security problems?

I do it on days I’m on my own but I tend to stay in the car. I don’t do it on days I’ve got my 3 year old too as I think it’s too easy to be distracted.

It's more them taking the car with the child stillin it. Easy access when it's open. So many car thefts these days.

*For people banging on about handbags and purses, you wouldn't be watching the car the whole time with a purse in there. Why would you?

If the OP says she is watching the car and can see if anyone is on the street, can hear the baby, is 10ft away, AND has the car door open, then i think all this talk of kidnap is ridiculous.*

I think in theory that sounds fine, but the reality isn't always as simple as that. OP mentioned she had another child in the house with her. Yes, this time it was fine and the child was colouring in, but what if next time something happened and OP had to go tend to her child indoors that took up 15 minutes or so? I just think it's impossible to dedicate yourself to staring out the window while also minding another child/children. And that is where the risk is increased. In the time OP could be tending to her child inside (maybe she fell and hurt herself, something like that), something could easily happen outdoors. Yes, the risk is small. But it's still a risk. If you're comfortable taking risks and are going to be fine with the possible repercussions then that's fine, but some of us wouldn't be and that's why we wouldn't.

Mumsnet is a very strange place, though. Feeding your baby baby food is almost a cardinal sin yet leaving your baby largely unattended outside is fine. Baffling.

Random cats do not go into random cars to sit on random sleeping babies

but random wasps or kidnappers may do so or car may self explode (risk enhanced by baby being in there alone, would not happen otherwise) or there may be falling debris from a plane

Everyone in our rural school quite happily leaves sleeping babies/toddlers in the car park and goes in to collect older kids.

I would never do this. If there are two adults then I’d sit in the car with the baby. Why take the risk if you don’t need to?

@margaritaproblems

And I'm watching the whole time. dh is around today so I'm literally just sat watching the car.

If you were just sat watching the car, why didn't you sit IN the car? If my 1 year old falls asleep in the car I sit on the drive until he wakes up. I would never leave him in the car on his own, especially if he was out of sight and certainly not with the door open. I live in a quiet cul de sac as well.

I don't think you're supposed to leave baby in car seat for long duration and especially when not travelling. Apparently it's dangerous!
Google it. Apart from anything else I wouldn't leave the baby alone in the car.

I presume the person who said a wasp could get in the car must hover over their child 24 hours a day when they’re in the house etc. You do realise wasps can come in the house too

Haha I said about a wasp. I must have written the post badly if you think I was giving that as a genuine reason.

I used to do this - but with the car locked. I'd sit in the living room watching, and yes I could see my DC all the time. Alternatively I'd sit in the car with a coffee and magazine - occasionally I'd take a nap too!

I did this when mine were little and asleep in car but I would sit watching from window..

A bit of a divide.

I'm not trying to justify my actions or as pp said looking for people to back me up but to clarify this is what happened and what I was thinking.

I left her in the car and I came inside - she's literally not had an uninterrupted daytime nap in about a week and i usually would drive somewhere and have a coffee but we had just got home, and if I sat in the car with her dd would have kept shouting me out of the door or window and probably woken her up. I don't mind her being woken every now and again but she did need a good sleep.

Kidnapping - I was watching the car, like with my eyes next to an open front door. I would have been up like a flash even seeing somebody approach. I'd probably more likely be car jacked at a set of lights or a petrol station,

She usually has daytime naps (before the summer holidays and kids waking her up) in her pram bassinet right next to the open window, so by being in the car she's only a few feet the other side of that window and I was sat next to it.

Positional asphyxiation - That's the reason we bought this car seat. It lies flat and she isn't left in it for hours at a time.

Overheating - she doesn't wear a coat in the car seat anyway and I left the drivers door wide open for this reason as well as being able to hear her. I know I can hear her from the car with the door open.

Cars randomly going on fire - I left the engine switched off and the key was in my pocket, so is this even possible?

You forgot the car rolling into Shirley’s non-existent river, and the noxious fumes emitted by the car seat

(my bad)

@ArgumentativeAardvaark what is with the car seat fumes? How do people transport their children?

Have I been a dickhead and bought a non organic car seat?

argumentative is teasing you / other posters about non existent / highly remote risks