Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Change of venue for PE

43 replies

Hoppinggreen · 09/09/2019 12:05

Before I explain yes I know my DD can walk this far, although Anxiety (which she has been having counselling for) means she gets very distressed about walking unfamiliar places alone and she absolutely refuses to get on a bus (would rather walk). She’s 14 and capable in theory but the situation is really stressing her out so I WILL have to drive her.
Dd goes to a Private school, I mention this to explain that the majority of dc don’t walk to school as they come from a wide area. From this week her year will be doing PE at the leisure centre in Town once a week to arrive there by 8.15. The venue is a 35 to 40 minutes walk from our house and the start time is 15 minutes earlier than her normal start time. The dc on the school bus have been told that the bus will divert and drop them off and the dc who’s parents drive them (the majority) have been told to get their parents to drop them there. No provision has been made for the dc who walk to school, I have queried this to be told that as there are only 3 of them there is no plan in place for them to get there.
I have to get another child to another school in the opposite direction so I will have to drive through heavy traffic, leaving 40 minutes earlier to drop her off, then come back past where we live, again in heavy traffic to take DS to school in the opposite direction. AIBU to be unhappy about this?
I know loads of people have much worse commutes to drop off dc at school but this school is less than 5 minutes walk from our house, which did actually have a bearing on us choosing it and this was sprung on us last week. It’s not the journey as such, which will be a pain but is doable, but the fact that as there are only 3 children in this position no plan has been made
Am I right to be unhappy about it?

OP posts:
PotteringAlong · 09/09/2019 12:08

Taxi? If it’s only a 30 min walk it’s not far

Sweetpotatoaddict · 09/09/2019 12:08

Sounds like the sensible thing would be for all to go to school and then be taken to the other venue. How do they get back from it to school again?

dontlikebeards · 09/09/2019 12:12

Is there a public transport bus she could take, you could do the journey with her a few times before hand so she gets used to the route?

Original poster
Hoppinggreen · 09/09/2019 12:12

Transport will be provided back to school
No need for a taxi as I will be taking her, it’s inconvenient but doable
It was more about whether it’s unreasonable of school to say oh well, there’s only 3 of you so we haven’t made provision for you.

OP posts:
Finfintytint · 09/09/2019 12:13

Are there any other parents that would be willing to give her a lift?
Or walk the route with her a few times until she is comfortable with it.

sirfredfredgeorge · 09/09/2019 12:16

Of course it's unreasonable, you're a customer complain, changing the start time and location of the school at a few days notice is completely out of order.

Why would you even be wondering if it's reasonable?

Original poster
Hoppinggreen · 09/09/2019 12:16

Sorry if it’s not clear
I don’t need a solution as I’m going to take her but AIBU to be annoyed at having this sprung on me and when I questioned it just to be told that as there are only 3 dc who walk they haven’t been considered?

OP posts:
Original poster
Hoppinggreen · 09/09/2019 12:19

sirfred because of the incredulity from the Head of Sports when I queried it.
It went like this (paraphrased)
Me - what about the kids who walk to school?
Him - Are there any?
Me - Yes
Him - don’t know, we hadn’t thought about that
Him (later). - I’ve looked into it and there only seems to be 3 of them
Me - well what about them.
Him- we haven’t considered it, can’t you drive her?

OP posts:
HugoSpritz · 09/09/2019 12:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BiddyPop · 09/09/2019 12:29

So you were told last week that from this week, once a week, the DC will need to be
a) in a different place and
b)15 minutes earlier than the normal school start time
for the purposes of PE.

Those getting school transport (bus) will be dropped on time at venue.

Those driving must divert and go earlier.

Those few walking (3) must make their way 30-35 minutes away, for a 15 minute earlier start - so effectively leaving home 40-45 minutes earlier than normal?! i.e. leaving home before 7.30am to be there on time?!

With little or no notice of this huge upheaval in the mornings?

Or consideration of any other morning issues within those families?

Original poster
Hoppinggreen · 09/09/2019 12:30

Yes she can but as I’ve said she won’t need to because I will be driving her
The question is - is it unreasonable for school to announce a once a week change of venue without planning how a small group of children will get there ?

OP posts:
Clangus00 · 09/09/2019 12:31

@HugoSpritz She has anxiety and won’t walk.

Tableclothing · 09/09/2019 12:34

School need to organise transport. The heat of PE will have a minibus licence, he can drive them. If you get no joy from him, complain to the Head. They don't get to spring this on you at a week's notice.

Chouetted · 09/09/2019 12:34

Can she walk with one of the other children?

Or get a lift with them?

Could you alternate lifts with another parent?

Tableclothing · 09/09/2019 12:34

*head

BarbariansMum · 09/09/2019 12:36

Yes YABU the school I assume arent doing it fir the hell of it and they cant deprive all their pupils of PE due to the mh issues of one.

If it's really such a chuff ask them to make an exception for your dd. But you will find more and more of her arrangements will assume a level if independence and flexibility as she grows up.

BarbariansMum · 09/09/2019 12:37

Tablecloth unless it's a tiny school one minibus isn't going to hold a class.

Tableclothing · 09/09/2019 12:38

If they can transport the kids back they can transport the kids there.

BiddyPop · 09/09/2019 12:38

I'd suggest that, if HoS is not worried as "there are only 3 of them", that he organises to collect them from school at (whatever time so they can drive in his car) and arrive the same time as others. Means those 3 won't need to start out at stupid o'clock to get there on time (and already have their PE needs for the week catered for in that extra walking!!), but just a few minutes (maybe 20) minutes earlier than usual to get to school.

Hooferdoofer37 · 09/09/2019 12:43

Ask if you can make a deduction from your school fees for your time and petrol to accommodate this change.

BackforGood · 09/09/2019 12:44

Surely if there are only 3, then it can't be beyond the realms of possibility they could get lifts with their friends for this issue?
Except that you have said you can, and will drive her, so you aren't actually asking for solutions?

ds's school used to meet at the swimming baths back in Yr7, when it was their class's turn to swim. I understand the minibus was used before/ at the start of school for something else and then it came to collect them (in 2 groups) at the end. I presume if anyone was too far from the baths and not able to get a bus there, they asked a mate to help out. Seemed an eminently sensible solution to me that they all met there, rather than wasting time going to school, then having to shuttle the minibus to move them all to the baths, all of which would take more time out of other lessons.

Biggie123 · 09/09/2019 12:47

OP - can she walk??

Just Kidding! seems noone is actually reading what you have written.

I do think it's unreasonable.

  • changing the school start time can have a significant impact on a family. Yes, it is just 15mins but in my household the whole routine has had to be carefully crafted with other childrens schedule, trains, work etc etc. It's taken much negotiation with work etc to make it work.
  • changing location also has a big impact on people and like you said, you pay for this school and part of that was enabling your child to walk there without anxiety.

I would be annoyed they have made these changes with such little notice. it shows they have given no thought to how it impacts the families.

Original poster
Hoppinggreen · 09/09/2019 12:49

Where have I said I want to deprive anyone of their PE due to my DD’s MH issues?
Nobody will be deprived or inconvenienced except me ( and DS who will be leaving 40 minutes earlier to come with me to drop his sister off).
I just feel it’s unfair for the dc who do walk to school not to even be considered in the arrangements
Biddypop sums it up nicely, I am happy for her to go to the other venue, I think it’s a good idea and will allow them access to more choices for PE but I’m unhappy that there’s an assumption the parents can all accommodate this

OP posts:
Original poster
Hoppinggreen · 09/09/2019 12:50

Thanks biggie I hadn’t considered whether she could walk!!! Grin

OP posts:
reginafelangee · 09/09/2019 12:55

Hi OP

yes I would have been annoyed. As Biggie123 says changing school drop off times and locations can have a massive impact on families and clearly this teacher has not given it a moment's thought - or care.