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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Change of venue for PE

43 replies

Hoppinggreen · 09/09/2019 12:05

Before I explain yes I know my DD can walk this far, although Anxiety (which she has been having counselling for) means she gets very distressed about walking unfamiliar places alone and she absolutely refuses to get on a bus (would rather walk). She’s 14 and capable in theory but the situation is really stressing her out so I WILL have to drive her.
Dd goes to a Private school, I mention this to explain that the majority of dc don’t walk to school as they come from a wide area. From this week her year will be doing PE at the leisure centre in Town once a week to arrive there by 8.15. The venue is a 35 to 40 minutes walk from our house and the start time is 15 minutes earlier than her normal start time. The dc on the school bus have been told that the bus will divert and drop them off and the dc who’s parents drive them (the majority) have been told to get their parents to drop them there. No provision has been made for the dc who walk to school, I have queried this to be told that as there are only 3 of them there is no plan in place for them to get there.
I have to get another child to another school in the opposite direction so I will have to drive through heavy traffic, leaving 40 minutes earlier to drop her off, then come back past where we live, again in heavy traffic to take DS to school in the opposite direction. AIBU to be unhappy about this?
I know loads of people have much worse commutes to drop off dc at school but this school is less than 5 minutes walk from our house, which did actually have a bearing on us choosing it and this was sprung on us last week. It’s not the journey as such, which will be a pain but is doable, but the fact that as there are only 3 children in this position no plan has been made
Am I right to be unhappy about it?

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LIZS · 09/09/2019 13:00

Yes it is irritating and school should make provision. Could you drop her part way or are any of the other 3 passing by? How are they returning to school afterwards?

Sweetpotatoaddict · 09/09/2019 13:03

Yanbu at all op. They should consider everyone’s needs when making these plans.
That’s what I was getting at when I asked how they would get back, I was curious to see if they expected everyone to walk the distance back to school or not.

TiffanyAtBreakfast · 09/09/2019 13:04

Definitely unreasonable (them). Why should just 3 children not be considered?! I'd complain and ask for a car to go from school to PE for those three.

Hoppinggreen · 09/09/2019 13:09

The original letter just says “transport will be provided back to school”

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Bluewall · 09/09/2019 13:14

Not sure if she would be up for it but would it be easier if you could drop her at one of the (school) bus stops possibly one where one of her friends gets on ? Of so tell the school she will be getting the school bus on those days ?

Doesn't sound well organised at all !!

Hoppinggreen · 09/09/2019 13:15

Just found out that one of the other 3 who walk is a child of a teacher at the school. Not sure how that’s going to work then

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Hoppinggreen · 09/09/2019 13:17

Bluewall the school is a 3/4 minute walk from our house so there isn’t a pick up point anywhere nearby, the closest pick up point is probably near the sports centre in a Town !
I would also probably have to pay for the bus as well

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Grambler · 09/09/2019 13:22

When they say transport will be provided back to school then surely they can use that method of transport to transport the 3 children from school to the venue in the first place?

Thingsthatgo · 09/09/2019 13:35

Presumably the buses belong to or are hired by the school and they dictate the pick up points and cover a lots of the local area for pick ups. I would look into the routes and see if there is a more convenient place for you to drop off. Is the whole school going at the same time?

Hoppinggreen · 09/09/2019 13:43

It’s just her year.
As we live so close to school there would be no reason for there to be a bus pick up point anywhere near our house.
The point is why am I having to find solutions ( obviously I will for DD’s sake) when the school is a very easy under 5 minutes walk away and we’ve had no say in the venue change and earlier start time
Currently DD leaves home at 8.15 to walk. Me and DS leave at 8.25 to drive in the opposite direction.
We will have to leave all together at about 7.45 by car on Fridays from now on. DS drive to school will go from 10 minutes to 40 minute plus, involving driving back past our house (and DD’s school)
Luckily it IS possible but I do think that an assumption has been made by the Head of PE that’s unreasonable

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RachelEllenR · 09/09/2019 13:46

I don't think it is unreasonable for them to have PE somewhere else/not provide transport - but the very short notice is unreasonable. If you'd known before the summer you could have tried to prepare her to walk perhaps.

Hoppinggreen · 09/09/2019 14:14

Unfortunately walking really isn’t an option
The children have been targeted in the past in the local area due to their uniform. The yearly unaccompanied trip to KFC as a reward for the highest merit score has had to be cancelled due to a nasty incident where a member of the public had to intervene. It was a one off but dd witnessed it and was very shaken and is understandably nervous about walking through the same area in her uniform. Just wearing a coat won’t help as the uniform of the other school is very different- the pupils of that school weren’t involved in the incident but there has been a bit of verbal abuse.
Luckily I can drive her so I will

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BarbariansMum · 09/09/2019 14:42

I'm not arguing that she should walk, given her anxiety, but regarding the uniform thing, she wouldnt need to wear one. Just joggers and coat over PE kit and uniform in a bag.

Hoppinggreen · 09/09/2019 14:50

God, I didn’t even think about bags
She would have to carry her uniform and all her books etc for the day as well.
Luckily she’s not walking - but if she was I guess she could stick on normal joggers, although they get in trouble for non standard kit do she would have to get them off pretty quick before her teachers noticed
Anyway, it’s nit an issue as I’m driving her

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Witchinaditch · 09/09/2019 16:20

Can your daughter walk the 30mins? I know you said she is anxious about it but maybe if you drop her a few times so she knows the way she may feel more comfortable walking there.

Witchinaditch · 09/09/2019 16:21

Sorry just read your update about walking not being an option! Ignore my post x

zxcvhjkl · 09/09/2019 18:17

YANBU. The school is though.

Last minute changes of plan, earlier start, no provision for those who walk or those who may struggle with change and an assumption that everyone will just be able to accommodate it. And they expect you to pay for the privilege of being treated like that?! Personally I would be complaining to the school and finding out why exactly the children can't come to school as usual and then all be transported to the venue together and back again. Much easier all round.

Hoppinggreen · 09/09/2019 21:55

Just had an email to say DD can get a lift with the staff in the school minibus
I haven’t told her yet Grin

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