DP leaves shoes out

[Whatisnormalhere]

My DP leaves his shoes out on the floor where me and DS trip on them. I've told him a few times to please move them where we can't trip on them. But it won't. He tells me and I can move them if I don't like it.

I'm upset about it, I said I'm not your mum, you do it yourself. He said he would do it for me. I think he's being very childish.
Am I being unreasonable?

Establish a place he's supposed to put them. If they don't go there, and you have to touch them yourself, while in your hand put them on the doorstep. No one will trip on them there.

He's not being childish by the way a child would never say that. He's being thoughtless.

Why do you keep tripping on them? My shoes lie in the hallway and I've never tripped over them. If it bothers you so much move them.

He is being childish, but if you know he’s always leaving them lying around, how do you keep tripping over them?

I would throw them out the back door

We live in a small granny flat so we don't have much space. That's why it bothers me. Our son is only 2 years old and has tripped over them while playing.

My DH did this on Friday night, so I hid them.
I don't expect to have this problem again

I leave my own shoes lying round, trip over them and get annoyed with myself!
So I understand it must be doubly irritating for OP!

For example I sit on the end of my bed to take them off, then continue getting changed after work, then go downstairs again (I don't like putting still-warm clothes or shoes back in cupboards straightaway). Come back up, walk over to window, trip over shoes!

Is the issue that he doesn't agree with your opinion about where shoes should be kept? Maybe start from making some share decisions about organisation in the house.

I think you're being OTT about you tripping over them but can understand that the little one does so whilst wandering about.

He is being unreasonable. It's not difficult to identify a place to put his shoes. Yanbu as this would drive me mad as it's so trivial and he could take them off at the door, leave them in the bedroom or any number of reasonable places. But is he taking them off e.g. in the middle of the living room?

I would throw them out the back door

That's what I did! We had a new stair carpet and he would remove his shoes before going up and leave them at the bottom so I had to step over them. He also will remove them before entering the sitting room if he's been in the garden and leave them in the doorway. Two pairs went outside in the rain, of course it was all my fault!

@Redshoeblueshoe has it.

The shoes go where they’re supposed to or they go missing.

I leave my shoes all over the place. My mind is always on the next thing and I forget to tidy up after myself. Not sure if someone else could make me change

Chuck them outside! I do this and although he still leaves them lying around occasionally, he is generally a bit better at putting them away now.

he would remove his shoes before going up and leave them at the bottom so I had to step over them. He also will remove them before entering the sitting room if he's been in the garden and leave them in the doorway. Two pairs went outside in the rain, of course it was all my fault!

Seriously?! The guy takes them off before going into carpeted rooms or upstairs and still you complain?!

And if anyone ever threw my shoes outside for ANY reason I’d be really pissed off with them - it’s not on.

I get fed up of tripping over my DCs’ and DP’s shoes. I also sometimes trip over my own which have been left somewhere because none of us are perfect. We do have a shoe cupboard but it’s overfull so some shoes end up left out. It’s annoying, but not worth being a dick about.

Imagine if a woman came on here and said her DH was regularly throwing her belongings outside because he didn’t like where she’d left them. There’d be cried of abuse and LTB all round.

Grow up!

There is a place in the hall where I leave my shoes, neatly. We both used to leave shoes there, lined up.

Recently I have been finding a pair of very large shoes abandoned in the middle of the hall. At first I put them out of the way, by his chair. Now I just kick them out of the way as I pass. If I don't need to walk that way I leave them alone.

I have also stopped moving plates, mugs and glasses. I leave them where they are.

I used to be the shoe leaver outer. I insisted my dd put her shoes in the shoe box provided by the front door and then left mine all over the place! Got myself a shoe box - problem mostly solved.

Ikea has a solution for where to put the shoes, next is getting them in there. Ds thinks roughly in the direction of the unit is ok. It's not.

My DH did this on Friday night, so I hid them.

Yeah, THAT'S childish. Couples 'hiding' each other's things to score or attempt to make points is just ridiculous.

Pick them up and chuck them out the front door 🤷🏼‍♀️ Hopefully it will rain. Childish it is, and also quite funny.
Doesn’t need to be told several times.
I’ve got a ‘coffee mug leave wherever as twatty wife will clear it’ we came back from two weeks holiday and the 1/4 cup of coffee was mouldy.

I threw my DC shoes outside and since then they have been better. I fell over them when I was carrying a large basket of washing and really hurt myself. We have a shoe cupboard and a shoe tray from ikea but they were directly on the mat by the door NEXT to the shoe tray and I didn’t seem them

I'm convinced this is why most relationships/marriages eventually fall apart. Not because of cheating or some grand episode. It's the intervening scheming and low level disrespect, taking each other for granted that eventually sees things fall apart.

E.g. my ex husband still tells people that Vlad divorced him because he left his plate on the table and didn't put it in the dishwasher. But it wasn't that. It was all that it represented if anyone understands what I'm trying to say?

I would just move them. He's said he won't move them and you don't want to trip over them. Why not just move them?

Because she's not his slave and should be treated with some respect?

LTB. Never heard of such cruel spousal abuse. Next thing he will be putting his toothbrush in the wrong cup. Outrageous.