AIBU to be sick of my 'D'H's mansplaining?

[Petsr4life]

He does it all the time. He seems to think he is the expert on everything. Can't back it up with evidence/sources either. He just 'knows' E.g. we are in the process of selling our house. I mentioned that we can't take bolted on shelves. He is adamant that we can, despite never having done any research. He will then get angry with me and then eventually look it up. After which I've 'misunderstood' him. I'm sick and tired of this. Once in a while I wont back down and we'll have a big argument where I accuse him of gaslighting. He will eventually apologise and promise to never do it again. We have had this exact same argument hundreds of times.

What happened today takes the biscuit. We disagreed over the area equaling 10 square meters. He got angry with me and then looked it up. Which showed him I was right. Apparently I misunderstood him. Thing is, I have a maths degree, he doesn't... so why on earth did he try to argue in the first place.

AIBU of being sick of his mansplaining?

That’s tedious, he sounds massively insecure.

I work with someone who INSISTS on telling me how to do the job that I am qualified to do and have several years of experience doing. He has the same qualifications but less experience. If someone could tell me how to deal with him I'd be very grateful.....

OP next time he starts, just say to him 'so you're telling me that.....' and repeat what he's told you in words of one syllable. Make sure he agrees that's what he's said. So that when he says you've misunderstood, he hasn't a leg to stand on.
(And you constantly doing that will annoy the hell out of him, bonus.)

WIndy
I am afraid that in your situation I asked the twat which qualification he had. Then I asked him which qualification I had. Then I asked when he got said qualification. Then said when I got mine. Followed by and how many years practice experience have you got ? well then, I have 5 years more experience than you- so why do you feel you need to explain task x to me? Bit of incoherent mumbling- which I followed by "Nah- its chromosome linked sweetie" It took him a while for the penny to drop

Dh has been like this in the past, but some training been proven wrong has pretty much sorted it out. if he starts now, he gets 'the look' and has the sense to stop.

We had a great ongoing for months argument discussion once about what a "rhetorical question" was. I was right

The best one though was when i drove over some cats eyes in the middle of the road and he moaned, "dont drive over the cats eyes, you'll wreck the tyres" oookaaay
A couple of weeks later he drove over some
Me- "dont drive over the cats eyes you'll wreck the tyres"
Dh - "no it wont who told you that rubbish"
Me "you did, a couple of weeks ago"
Dh - embarrased silence
Me - smug silence

OP. You're still wrong about the shelves.

Sorry about this, I can't help it - Was he like this before you married him?

Alongside my boss I was interviewing a guy for a fairly junior position. He proceeded to mansplain her job to her.

He didn't get the job

Hopefully there is hope for him. My DAD does this and I reprimand him for it at which point he says ''you're so sensitive'' in a martyred tone, ''i can say nothing to you''.

It is absolutely infuriating. You are not being UNreasonable.

I'm sure you CAN be wrong despite having a maths degree, my brother often is! But it's just so exhausting having conversations like this. The real problem is not who has a maths degree and who does not,and this is a bit of division in my family. It is who is conscious of when their ego is at the helm and who is not.

If you take bolted on shelves with you you'll have to fill in the holes and repaint otherwise you have an eyesore

I think mansplainers should be ''called out'' on their behaviour but that in itself takes a skill. My dad just turns it round on me, that I am so sensitive.

What would work? Any suggestions?

Refuse to engage with it until he proves it. That's where you are going wrong, taking on the responsibility for the truth. Let him be wrong. Don't argue, walk away.

justgivemewine blow your dh's mind and inform him that part of the design of the cats eye is to allow it to be driven over as the lens is cleaned when pushed down.

Luckily my partner isn't like this, but he does have a friend who thinks he knows best at absolutely everything. I have a degree in psychology and he's a psychiatrist so we have decent debates about that kind of thing, and there was one conversation where I made a comment and he said "no it's not that, it's this" and I said "no I'm pretty sure, I remember revising it for my A Level" and I got a really snotty comment saying he thinks he'd know better being trained to doctorate level. I got really pissed off and Googled it, proving myself right. And then he said "Well, I suppose it is another way of looking at it." NO it isn't, you literally got something completely wrong, and what you said is not right under any circumstance, but you will never EVER say so!!

Cassandra i would if the opportunity arose but funnily enough it has never been mentioned again.

YABU to have married this tosser.

Every time he speaks just say the word "WRONG" very the volume, tempo and tone each time, occasionally interrupt to say it when you know he is starting.

Worked for me, been single for ages now

I’m a woman in a male dominated career so endure a lot of this. I find this article helpful at work:
www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart

So if a man does it it's mansplaining, but what if a women does it. Am I the only one to this this is sexist term used to belittle men? Anyone can be wrong anyone can think their right I have met many women who want to be the boss as much as men. If someone turns out to be wrong after making you feal bad then you could say I told you so, or you could just have that smug fealing knowing that you were right.

We need a feminist here to explain that men are already the dominant sex in society hence why there is no malist movement

Tell him you have booked for him to have a penis enlargement being as you are such a big dick head.
And the one you have isn't big enough.
Measure that.

I have this too, in fact my DH only has to hear of a job title and then he’s a qualified expert in that area. In the last few years he’s been: a mortgage advisor, chartered surveyor, midwife and vet to name just a few. Drives me crazy

Am I the only one to this this is sexist term used to belittle men?

I mean yeah, because men are so oppressed.

“Mansplaining” is a very particular course of action, it isn’t simply about someone being wrong.

@june2007 you have met a woman who would explain someone else's job to them? Who would tell someone with 20 years experience what it is all about despite not being educated within that field themselves and having no experience in the field themselves?
It is not about "wanting to be the boss" it is about belittling other people and it is DARVOS to claim that people belittle men by asking them not to belittle women or by calling them out on it when they belittle women. It is allowed to critizice men when they do something wrong, you know!

I cringe when DH does this to other people, his voice actually gets louder as if he is addressing a deaf person, I just wander off. He did this recently when I had done something he considered wrong re: gardening, I left the room but my adult son put him right. He did not apologise of course but was quieter afterwards. I tried to explain I had done the research even watched some you tube tutorials, wasting my breath.