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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this was a bit weird

32 replies

Whuut · 04/09/2019 22:07

I was out having lunch with my sister and DS who is 10 weeks old. He was sat on my lap as a lady walked over and asked if she could say hello, I said of course and so sat him up on the table holding him so she could see him better. This lady then reached for DS and said 'Oh you come here to me' and before I even had time to see what was happening she had taken him straight from me. I felt slightly weird about it but thought okay just go with it. She then kissed him on the cheek and just stood there holding him. She seemed perfectly nice, of course was just wanting to coo over him and I didn't say anything as I was just a bit shocked and she gave him back soon after, I just found it a bit strange.

AIBU in thinking this was a bit weird?

OP posts:
ZiggyB · 04/09/2019 22:09

Everyone loves a baby to coo over!

However most people don’t help themselves to strangers babies. YANBU

mmmcflurrys · 04/09/2019 22:10

YANBU. Very weird

FoldenHoard · 04/09/2019 22:10

Umm yeah, allowing random strangers to hold and kiss your baby is weird in my eyes.

PalmersGreen · 04/09/2019 22:10

I would have been furious!

A stranger leant into DS’s pram to (presumably) kiss him once, I manhandled her away!

Original poster
Whuut · 04/09/2019 22:14

I did find it really weird but it happened so quickly, I guess I was just a bit gobsmacked. Looking back I wish I had said something.

OP posts:
dollydaydream114 · 04/09/2019 22:15

YANBU. Absolutely fine for strangers to want to coo over a baby but I'm pretty sure actually picking one up isn't OK.

AMidsummersNightsNightmare · 04/09/2019 22:17

YANBU! Many strangers will have a look at my baby and coo over him but they never hold him or kiss him

SallyWD · 04/09/2019 22:18

Was she an old lady? For some reason I can only picture an old lady doing this. Some people are just like this with babies. It's a little odd but I wouldn't be upset about it.

Windydaysuponus · 04/09/2019 22:19

Yabu not to appreciate your dc brought such a lovely reaction to a stranger. My mil never wanted to hold her own dgs..
She kissed a cheek which is preferable to lips and prob left feeling uplifted.
Look on Pinterest for a homeless man who holds a baby in a restaurant.... Will make you sob.

PumpkinP · 04/09/2019 22:20

I’m always amazed how many people on here just let this stuff happen to them. Just say no.

Original poster
Whuut · 04/09/2019 22:20

Yes she was older. My sister and I are 24 and 21 but both look quite young, not sure if that made a difference to how she was.

OP posts:
Original poster
Whuut · 04/09/2019 22:24

I do appreciate the fact it probably made her happy but I just didn't expect her to just take him out my arms. And a stranger is different to a Mil.

OP posts:
Chocmallows · 04/09/2019 22:27

YANBU
You do not know this stranger and it's OTT, a smile would have been enough!

EAIOU · 04/09/2019 22:28

Her intentions were good.

Her actions were over the top.

Your reaction was normal- you didnt feel he was in imminent danger and have had a ooh that was strange moment.

Yes, she was invasive and a bit much at a strangers baby but I'm sure this will have made you a bit more guarded.

There has been plenty of people that has cooed over mine and rubbed her hands and feet. None have kissed her. Thats where I'd draw the line.

Bobbiepin · 04/09/2019 22:29

I don't understand why strangers think it's ok to kiss other people's babies. The herpes virus is so easily transmitted and can be fatal to young babies, it's a selfish and downright rude thing to do.

1stmonkey · 04/09/2019 22:32

Yes, it is a bit strange. Happened to me when dd was only a few weeks older than your ds. Went to a lovely italian restaurant with dh and as soon as we sat down the waitress came and took dd to show her off to all the staff! I wasn't sure whether to be panicked or thrilled to have a glass of wine in peace!!

Original poster
Whuut · 04/09/2019 22:33

Yeah the kiss was what made me uncomfortable. I actually don't think I would have really minded if she just wanted a cuddle.

OP posts:
LillithsFamiliar · 04/09/2019 22:47

She may have thought you wanted her to take him and that's why you lifted him up on to the table. I'd put it down to a misunderstanding. otherwise yy it was odd

GetOffTheTableMabel · 04/09/2019 22:51

I would love to randomly scoop up other people’s babies and cuddle and kiss them. But I don’t, because it’s just not appropriate. YANBU.
I really wish it was.

ThatClaireIsARightPain · 04/09/2019 22:55

I think in some cultures this is probably more usual.

1stmonkey mentioned Italians and I have had similar experiences in Spain.

FurrySlipperBoots · 04/09/2019 23:09

*I think in some cultures this is probably more usual.

1stmonkey mentioned Italians and I have had similar experiences in Spain.*

I was a bit gobsmacked in Spain when the maids who'd come to clean the villa, without a word of English, swooped up the 3 year old and started kissing her!

HaileySherman · 04/09/2019 23:09

Yanbu. But true, everyone loves to cuddle a little baby. I'm sure you made her quite happy. I feel your pain though. My oldest was born a week before Christmas. All my family wanted to hold her. I was a bundle of nerves and irritation inside, really freaking out. Years later when i admitted it to my aunts, they said I hid it very well. They always thought i was very laid back lol. Glad I faked it well. I think a stranger taking hold of and kissing my baby would have sent me over the edge. That feeling is normal.

HoofWankingSpangleCunt · 04/09/2019 23:13

I have very fond memories of Amalfi, a restaurant on Old Compton Street, in 2000.
As soon as we'd taken out seats, a very enthusiastic waiter plucked baby DD,

user1473878824 · 04/09/2019 23:17

@FoldenHoard what unnecessary comment.

user1473878824 · 04/09/2019 23:17

And what a lack of the word “an”

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