Who should pay for the carpet cleaner?

[MyGhastIsFlabbered]

My mum is staying with me at the moment to help with childcare over the school holidays. She brought her elderly dog with her who over the weekend had diarrhoea all over the lounge carpet. We tried vanish carpet shampoo but it barely touched it so she arranged to hire a carpet shampooer. She's just asked me how I'm paying for it.

AIBU to think her dog made the mess she should pay? Or, given that I'll benefit from cleaner carpets we should at least split it? I'm very tired and grumpy so not feeling very charitable towards the dog right now.

If she provided free children over the summer then you should pay as it was a accident

How much did you pay your mum for all the childcare she provided for you over the school holidays and how many hours? Did she stay with you or travel home every night?

Are you actually being serious? Of course you should pay. She wouldn't have been in your house with her dog if you weren't using her for childcare. Actually, I've just realised you didn't say if you've paid her or not for the childcare. I think that would make a difference. Not paid, you should pay. Paid, then that's essentially a job, and she's messed up the 'office' so possibly she should.

She lives in France so has stayed here. I haven't paid her for childcare per se but she's not paid for food, electricity, or anything else for 2 months. So I kind of figured out that was fair.

Of course you should pay. Sorry.

Oh and for 3 weeks she wasn't doing any childcare because the boys were either with their dad or away with me.

There's a very long history between me and my mum which does cloud my judgement slightly so I guess I'll pay for the cleaner and suck it up.

Who would you expect to pay for the cleaning if one of the kids vomited on her carpets?

Incidentally I puked on my nan’s New carpet when I was about 6, she harped on about it for about 20 years, basically until she died!

In that case op, I'm sorry but I do think you should pay. Neither she, nor her dog, would have been in your house if she wasn't doing you a favour.

She lives in France so has stayed here. I haven't paid her for childcare per se but she's not paid for food, electricity, or anything else for 2 months. So I kind of figured out that was fair.

^What? I would even dream of asking my visiting mother to pay for food, electricity or anything else

But for the free childcare, I’d say age should pay. I’d still expect her to offer and for you to decline.

I think your mum should pay, or at very least split the bill.

Why cant you just hire The Rug Doctor from a supermarket and do it yourself - far cheaper.

I'd still expect her to pay. It's her dog who she didn't have to bring with her. She's also had utilities, food and accommodation free for the past 2 months.

@misspiggy, you'd expect someone staying for two months to not have to put their hand in their pocket once?!

If it was me I would probably pay it since she is staying to look after the children, but to be honest if it was my mum she would be offering to pay it, she would be mortified! We'd probably end up splitting it I imagine but we have a good relationship

Does she not have expenses for her home in France? Even if she's away, surely she still has bills to pay there? And of course she had to bring the dog with her - what was she meant to do with it for 2 months?

My mum would pay, but then she knows that she has double my income even on her pension. I would absolutely expect and want to pay myself though if it's my house and she's been doing me a favour.

We are hiring it from a local shop, but I'm on a very tight budget and even £50 represents most of my weekly food budget.

I'd never ask a friend or relative visiting for a short time for money for food but over 2 months feeding an extra person, plus dog, soon mounts up.

I think I'm just feeling grumpy because I've been living with my mum for 2 months and she's slowly driving me up the wall. This latest mishap with the carpet is just the latest one in a catalogue of 'argh' moments.

Childcare is expensive, around £30-£35 a day here so she's saved you 150-175 per week per child

Does the father contribute? Perhaps you can tell him to split the costs of housing your mum to accommodate child care over holidays and take It from there

I wouldn't ask my mum though (although my mum would have paid anyway as she was very generous and did that sort of thing )

If money is that tight then maybe you could ask if she could help out with some food or with some of the cost of the carpet cleaner. How much childcare is she doing? Childcare is expensive so maybe she is saving you loads of money.

I think I would at least expect her to go halves, particularly if she can afford it and you are broke! Maybe arrange a shorter visit next time...

Yeah I'm really not doing this again next summer. I have no idea either how I'm going to cover holidays or how to break it to my mum that I don't want her doing it any more.

Their dad, unfortunately, is of the opinion that he gets 4 weeks holiday a year and that's where his responsibility ends...the other 9 weeks holiday is my problem...but that's a whole other thread.

I would say that you are unreasonable. However, having your mother staying 2 months gives you a free pass imho. My mum had to stay with us for 9 week. At the end of it I was the most unreasonable person in the world

You should pay.

You should pay.
Even if the childcare was "only" for 3 of the 6 weeks, she has still saved you a fortune in childcare times at least 2 dc (as you said 'boy s in one of your posts).
It is unfortunate, but there's no way you should ask her to pay.

Buy yourself a vax rapide refresh £179 from currys it's a fabulous machine that will last you for ages,my carpets look like new.