AIBU to think you never say to someone "Wow you eat a lot!" or...

[NoDontLookAtMeImShy]

"Oh my God Jane, you eat your food so fast!"

No you fucking idiot, I started my food before you did because you were talking endlessly.
But thanks for making me feel like a fat greedy pig in front of all the other wedding guests at our table.

AIBU? Or was she BU?

She wasn't a friend. I'd never met her before in my life.
I didn't even know her name.
I've no idea how she knew mine.

I don't understand why you wouldn't answer with "not at all, you were talking when i started".

It's sad how many women are so emotionally invested in how/what they and others are eating.

I cut conversations by bringing that up, I'm not going to feed into the belief that this faulty thinking should be the norm.

We all need an amount of calories to survive. When and how we take them in, doesn't mean we are greedy. If you want to fill up once a day, that's your business.

People who come out with this crap sound like a six year old and need to be told to shush, like one.

The only possible response is
" Wow, you make personal remarks don't you?"
In exactly the same time of voice and then ignore...

Or scrape their plate into your own and eat that as well

I don't know why I didn't. I kicked myself for not saying exactly that.

Worse still my stupid jokey reply back made it sound as though I do wolf my food down.

I hate people commenting on my eating; it makes it worse that she didn’t know you. I’m a size 10 and my diet isn’t amazing but at work I generally eat healthily. I used to have a couple of women comment on my food so much I’d purposefully avoid eating around them. If it happened now I’d be more assertive but in my early twenties it just made me feel horribly self conscious

People often say it to me it never makes me feel fat as I am not fat.

I agree. These sort of comments imo are comments like any other. They are only "inappropriate" if you're speaking to someone who you know is very sensitive about weight issues. But then again, I spent a lot of time in Japan, Taiwan, and Singapore where eating is a national past-time, so I don't tend to see food-related comments as anything other than that!

She has serious food issues if you only met at the wedding.
I'd ignore her she is projecting her own food weirdness.

Oh dear. I confess to doing this all the time. I do eat a lot & often. It would never offend me if you commented on it. Meanwhile, DH tends to be the table hoover who stops any food at shared meal from going to waste. Who could pack the most away was a topic of banter me + 5 work colleagues at a meal out the other night (I congratulated the guy who ate the most).

There are times when it's fine to comment as part of chitchat & nobody is offended, so yabu.

Eating fast doesn't make anyone a pig, but I'm puzzled how they can enjoy food if eat fast. "Eat slow & long" is funner. Food is too nice to rush.

So you would comment on a strangers eating speed or amount in front of others?
YABU.
I don't think we'll agree on this one.

And again - I didn't eat anything fast.

I wish people wouldn’t do this. Never comment on anyone’s food unless it’s something positive e.g ‘that looks amazing!’

People that negatively comment on others food/mealtime habits are simply rude.

I once had a colleague (who was sat next to me) announce loudly at a meal with 20 other people ‘I need to move as SHE (me!) has ordered fish’.

Wtf is wrong with people?! Grow up!

I can assure you that she had eaten breakfast and lunch KatherineJaneway.

I never said anything because it is rude, and my friend has put on a lot of weight, so it would have been extremely insensitive.

.DH eats fast. I hate it. Makes him look greedy

^^ exactly this, it's hang ups around food that are the issue not people just making conversation.

Why is food such a taboo that it can't be commented on? If you are offended by someone making a comment about eating you have an unhealthy relationship with food.

People that negatively comment on others food/mealtime habits are simply rude.

Why is eating fast negative? 🤷🏻‍♀️

If you are offended by someone making a comment about eating you have an unhealthy relationship with food.

I absolutely agree.

I have had a word with DH about commenting on food consumption if I or DC don't eat much at a meal
E.g - at a restaurant, if food not to my taste, I don't want it pointed out that I'm not eating much as may put DC off eating theirs too (esp when younger)

• at home - if DD's pushing food round plate, may be because upset about something and not so hungry but trying hard just to fit in with family routine and chat at meal. They don't need it pointed out they are not eating much!

I think it's rude and irritating

I eat fast because 1. I don't like my food going cold and 2. I like to try and eat as much as possible before my stomach tells me I'm full especially if it's tapas (I'm a size 10 and not overweight) I just love food!
People comment on my eating habits all of the time and yes it's rude of them but I really don't care. I usually just respond with a shrug and "I'm hungry"

I often get told this but I do eat really fast. My sis is my best eating companion. "Dinner served, speak to you in a bit, yes?"

I just don’t understand why adults have to comment on other adults eating at all. It’s one thing if you say to your child, slow down a bit, you’ll choke/get a tummy ache etc, but adults do not need to comment on the speed of/amount that another adult is eating. Do you have nothing else to discuss? How weird and rude.

“Well, I don’t talk as much as you.”

Somehow I have these conversations & everyone laughs & joins in.
Somehow I don't mix with snowflakes.

My friend had curry, rice and naan, and ate all of it

Shock horror - the millions of South Asian people that eat curry, rice and naan several times a week must all "eat a lot" in that case.

facepalm

I bet their portions aren't as large Kitkat
I am talking Barnsley sized portions here

My mum does this a lot and definitely has issues around weight which she projects onto my sister and me.

‘Wow you were hungry!’
‘Are you ever going to stop eating today?’

It’s become like background noise to me.

If commenting on eating fast is negative... then why do you eat fast & put yourself in position to attract the criticism?

Either you think eating fast is fine in which case, who cares if someone else doesn't like it...

Or you agree with the critics & you eat fast anyway. You just think it's rude of them to point out you did something bad.

MN is so full of MindReaders. Since they can tell that someone would only ever make these comments because they want to make other people bad. There is no other possible explanation.

I'd quite like someone to do some good mind reading on politicians. Anyone up for putting their amazing mindreading abilities to a useful purpose?