To leave Australia and move back to the UK

[nameisnotimportant]

We have a great life here in Aus. Great lifestyle and secure jobs with great friends.

However we miss family so much, especially since having kids. Life in the U.K. would be a lot more secure in terms of buying a house and being able to bring up our kids in one area.

Pros of moving back to the U.K.

1. We could afford to buy a decent sized house in a nice area with a low mortgage. In aus, we will have to rent forever because house prices are absolutely ridiculous and finding a three bedroom in the area we want, would be near impossible. We would also have to stay in an apartment which isn't ideal with children.
2. We would be near family, wouldn't miss all the events like birthdays, weddings. Would have help with childcare and could actually have a date night once in a while.
3. Our holidays wouldn't have to be spent visiting family and would save us a lot of money.

Cons

1. We have a great group of friends in Aus and don't really have this in the Uk, so would have to basically start again in terms of making friends.
2. We would have the uncertainty of having to find new jobs and risk not liking them etc.
3. The U.K. weather, more so how long winter is because we actually don't mind the rain and are kind of sick of living in the sun.

4 Healthcare is better in Aus, we have private health insurance and get quicker access to services as the health system is generally not as strained.

So what do you think we should do. Should we move or stay put ?

I know someone who was in your situation and they came back to the UK as they had children and wanted them to be with grandparents etc.
They 100% wish they'd stayed in Australia. Their lifestyle here is monotonous and they miss their friendship group immensely. Her husband works 2 jobs and they still don't live comfortably.

Bear in mind that a huge chunk of your savings are going to be chewed up by moving country. Moving country is a hugely hugely expensive thing to do once you have a household to relocate, children and all of the stuff they accumulate. You’ll possibly need to break contracts on various things, and that can be very expensive unless you plan at least 1-2 years out and save even harder to cushion the blow.

So maybe start to do that and plan, but FGS don’t move back to the U.K. now!!!! It’s not the country you left. Brexit will cause recession, I’m convinced of it.

Definitely don't do it now. Wait til a year post brexit, it's going to be bad.

Don't make any major decisions until after Brexit!

Oh you’d be very, very naive to come back right now. Brexit will likely lead to recession and it’ll be very hard to come by new jobs etc.

Good Lord no, stay away at least until the dust settles after Brexit (whenever the fuck that is). It’s really unpleasant here at the moment and no indication that it’ll get any better in the short to medium term - quite the opposite.

Don’t do it now.
Also take into account that promises for childcare made for somebody who currently lives abroad are often wishful thinking rather than reality based. And childcare provided by elderly relatives can disappear from one day to the next - can you still afford it (especially assuming that jobs after Brexit will be difficult to find and you will be massively limited by area to move to!). i work in a very expat heavy line of work - childcare promised by mum/dad/etc almost never works out as people’s wishful thinking by far exceeds what they realistically can do....

How long have you been in Australia?

I think PP are correct about waiting for the Brexit impact to sort itself out and the implications of it.

I also feel some of your Pros for home aren't guaranteed. I.e your mum doing childcare - she might get ill or change her mind. Childcare is exceedingly expensive over here. Date nights with family babysitting....again no guarantee they will.

I think whilst you wait for Brexit to sort itself out, l think you really need to make more of ago of it where you currently are.

The grass is greener which ever side you water it

Right now is not the time to make this decision. Leave it a couple of years.

The family in affordable place v. friends inan expensive city dilemma is one that parents struggle with all the time, but the UK is just such a precarious situation right now and the jobs situation may totally upend completely changing the housing calculation and leaving you struggling where you thought you were sorted.

I think you should consider doubling down on Australia for a couple of years. What would it look like if you ignored the pull to go back to the UK every year? I know how it feels - I moved to the US with kids and the pressure is significant. But it can really skew your vacation time and sap a lot of funds if you make it an annual pilgrimage.

Think long term I.e. 5 years plus.

See what happens post Brexit and the fall out from the USA/ China trade war

If you still wish to move back, so be it but I think you will find that the U.K. is not the same one you left 😬

How do you know you will have childcare when you move to the UK though?

People say they will help but will they really.

You may come back and find family are all busy with their own lives.

I'd ignore the advice of waiting for Brexit and ConstanzaAndSalieri what a load of rubbish you've spouted.

I've lived in Oz and I live in the UK now - I'd pick UK every time but it's a personal choice. Don't get me wrong we absolutely loved Australia but for us family and the UK weather won out and I don't regret it. We lived in Sydney aswell and found the house prices crippling however we live in a very lovely area back home now and are now practically mortgage free. Oz is very expensive - far more so than the UK.

As someone said take your time and secure at least one job before coming home. Do you have residency in Oz? If so it would be less of a risk if you don't settle back in the UK you could always go back. It would be a massive upheaval but at least you would have that as a fall back if it doesn't work out.

We found when we came back from Oz alot of people saying we were mad and would slag the UK off. Most of these people had never even been to Australia. I've lived abroad in a few countries and realised that if you have a reasonable job, sensible with money and choose carefully where you live home has alot to offer and we are lucky in many ways. Contrary to what others have said we are also one of the most tolerant countries to live in. I understand that is not every persons experience but it has been mine.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

Our friends are good and do the occasional babysit once in a while but family it would be more regular and my mum has offered to do a childcare day one day a week so it would reduce our childcare cost

Not good reason to move back to the UK.

I think you know in your gut when it comes down to something big like moving and if you're leaning towards one you should start looking into what you can do to make it happen. I'd totally agree with the poster who says make sure you have one job in the family before you move

We have lived in Sydney for 8 years now and have citizenship, so we always have that to fall back on if we need it. We moved away when we were young, wanted new to experiences and to travel this side of the world which we have pretty much done. Now we have had children, I am missing my family a lot more. My family are all up North where house prices are a lot more affordable and I don't anticipate us having a problem finding jobs, as my husband gets job offers quite regularly. I agree it will be best to wait until the dust settles after brexit and then decide. I guess in the mean time we can just keep saving money and then decide.

How old are your children? How much longer will they be in childcare, if you are using that as a consideration?

They are 18 months and 4 months so lots of childcare years ahead of us.

We were in your position 10 years ago (not in Australia, in the USA), and we moved back to the UK. I don't regret it for a moment. We could've afforded to buy a home actually, but we wanted to move back. I missed my family and friends and we just missed Europe. We missed having all those countries on our doorstep. Australia, like the USA is a massive country that's quite far from anywhere else, so when you've done the travelling you want to do there you're left with very long flights to get anywhere else.

As to your 'cons' list:
1. We have a great group of friends in Aus and don't really have this in the Uk, so would have to basically start again in terms of making friends.
How old are your kids? If they're little then that's a good time to move back and make friends. Primary school has been great for helping us to fully integrate into the place we moved to (a place where we initially knew no one).
2. We would have the uncertainty of having to find new jobs and risk not liking them etc.
I agree with the PP who said that at least one of you should try to find a job before you move, to give you a bit of certainty on that front.
3. The U.K. weather, more so how long winter is because we actually don't mind the rain and are kind of sick of living in the sun.
The UK weather can be miserable, particularly in the depths of winter, so we always book a holiday in the winter so we can get away. As Australian citizens maybe you could go back every couple of years and during the UK winter?
4. Healthcare is better in Aus, we have private health insurance and get quicker access to services as the health system is generally not as strained.
Get private healthcare if this worries you. I've never had an issue with the NHS, but for routine stuff that can take ages then BUPA or whatever is a great back-up. It certainly isn't a reason for remaining where you are.

But the bottom line is this - if you want to come home - come home. All the people saying this country has changed, I haven't noticed tbh. Yes, we have an absolute shambles of a government, but so do a lot of places and you have a right winger in power in Aus at the moment. By all means see what happens with Brexit - supposedly it's only 2 months away now so you don't have long to wait.

Jobs and schools.

Get that right is the main thing. So you probably need to visit the uk and do some serious research.
Australia is great. But the UK has so much on its doorstep. So much culture, varied scenery, all there if you choose to take it. Lots of universities when the time comes.That's why I'd choose the UK, but Australia is pretty good too.

I moved back to the UK from NZ. Biggest regret of my life. Life is so toxic here compared to the friendliness of NZ, mostly due to brexit and the divisions is caused.
Try moving to NZ instead. Climate is not as hot. Nothing poisonous. House prices are more affordable.

The UK is a mess right now. I absolutely wouldn't move until the shit show that is Brexit is well and truly over.

What do YOU want.
Personally I wouldn't! The weather is getting me down too much here I literally hibernate during winter. But my mum lives in another country anyway and his family are useless so I wouldn't have the family "problem" as such.
If you want your family do it. Or try it at least. It's a very personal decision.
I definitely would not!

I would. Come home!

I think you might have rose tinted glasses on, but they suit some people.

Wait at least a year to make any decision. Things are very tense and uncertain now, but there is no harm in getting ready.

I agree with all those who say don't come back now. We are basically a failed state at this point. It's an incredibly depressing place to live with virtually no functioning state provision for health and social care, libraries etc left. The fabric of society has been ripped up due to austerity then Brexit, and its only going to get worse, in the short and medium term.