Manager won’t let me go to my wedding

[Biggobyboo]

I’m a mature student (Master’s degree) and I’ve previously worked in professional office jobs. I’ve recently started a part time job on a make-up counter to earn some pin money and to get me out of the house. I always thought it seemed like a fun job and I like skincare and cosmetics.

When I sent back my contract to HR I mentioned I had my wedding coming up and a week off for my honeymoon. They said that was no problem.

I started the job and discovered my manager has the week of my honeymoon booked off for a holiday and flies out on my wedding day. The full time assistant is being a bridesmaid at another wedding that day so there is no cover in the store.

My manager said I cannot have the time off. I thought she was joking so I said “sure, I’ll just re-arrange it for the following week then!” She said that I should make it at least a couple of weeks after HER holiday. I explained that it wasn’t possible to cancel my wedding and she said it was a shame I wasn’t showing my dedication to the brand and being a team player so early on in the job. No more has been said as she has gone off sick so it’s just me and the other assistant. I can’t do too much (paid) overtime as I’m studying so she’s being funny with me. I’m contracted for 15 hours a week but I’m doing 22.5 hours currently to cover. The brand is recruiting for another part time assistant.

So should I just hand in my week’s notice now or wait until the week of my wedding? If I leave now, the other assistant will have nobody else so there will be no cover. The store is open around 60 hours a week but I’ve noticed the other brands leave their counters unmanned a lot of the time where they have no staff.

If I leave just before the wedding there will still be no cover for that weekend.

Any ideas? I’ve never worked anywhere this crazy before!

I do think this ridiculous because your manager knows you’ll quit over this. They can also get cover if they know in advance. I’d just point out something though. “Mention” has different connotation to told/informed/spoke about. That’s more about saying something in passing. Are you sure HR made note of this?

As your manager is off sick and they’re recruiting another sales person - is this for your position or because your manager is long term sick?

Get in touch with HR to remind them it’s your wedding coming up and you plan to be gone xx days. That you wanted to ensure they remembered/planned for given your manager is offf sick. You’ll find out from that conversation a bit more - will you have a job to come back to? Would it be paid? Part paid?

Lastly though, you said this was for pin money so don’t get too stressed out. You don’t need that in the run up to your wedding nor while you’re studying, if it doesn’t pan out, get another job. It’s worth while now chatting with the other cosmetic brand salespeople that you’re getting married and given your manager is off sick, your co-worker has that time off too, worried about your position as the newbie. As they struggle for coverage, should things not work out, let the other brands know you’re interested and they’ll know of your managers unreasonableness regarding your wedding so any poor recommendation wouldn’t really be listened too.

Oops, sorry- another lastly lastly - buy all your cosmetics now while you have your staff discount!

Best of luck with the wedding. If you’re doing this many hours, you’ll need gone in the run up to the wedding so plan to leave giving yourself enough time for all the things you’ll need to do to prepare.

I've mentioned this before; after I returned to P/T working at Asda from a knee replacement, I was told to ask for help shifting stock cages onto the shop floor.
I asked a new supervisor for help, and was told 'if you cant' do the job you shouldn't be here.' So I went upstairs, left a resignation letter in the office and walked out. Never heard from them again.

If u can do without the money just hand in your notice

I was going to say wait for HR (and I'd still be interested to hear what they have to say), but TBH your colleagues sound really unpleasant, making faces about what you do and sneering about your 'fancy degree'.

Fuck the lot of them. Leave them to the chips on their shoulders.

Not your problem. Hr have said you can have the time off, therefore they can’t take any action against you it’s your wedding!!

I would quit if you can easily get another job after your wedding.

Just be careful as if you don’t give notice, they can withhold pay. It’s better to go off sick then hand in your notice whilst off sick x

Not your problem. Just leave and enjoy your wedding don’t worry about anything else. HR can deal with it. don’t feel guilty.

FFS, HR can cancel the leave

The company can cancel your leave if they want to.

www.landaulaw.co.uk/holidays/

Can my employer cancel a pre-booked holiday?
Yes, your employer can cancel a period of annual leave, which is notice of at least the same length as the period of leave to be cancelled. For example, if you have booked a period of four days’ annual leave, your employer must give at least four days’ notice of cancellation.

Get a medical certificate that states work stress and enjoy your honeymoon as relaxing is good for your stress .. you can sign off without need for medical cert for 7 days. Don’t resign as that makes life easy for them if they are not going to honour your prearranged unpaid leave.

Apologies if you've already done this, haven't read entire thread, but I'd name the brand. If social media is good for one thing, it can force employers into treating staff better. She's your manager and therefore acting on behalf of the company. I wouldn't just walk away. Others don't have that luxury. If you don't make a stand, she'll treat someone else like shit.

I worked at a supermarket when I was doing my A levels and some of the supervisors were like this, they made sure I was rotated on whenever I had an exam just so they could yell at me about being "difficult" - I got told I would lose my job if I went to my chemistry exam, so I walked out mid shift, fuck that.

I came across this mentality when 'bullied' by the job centre to get a job i a factory. A real eye opener for someone who had worked in an office. I was due to take some exams and mentioned it to the line manager who then had to contact whoever was above her. It was weird because you were not allowed to speak to the managers when in an office situation the boss got a Hi john from me every morning!

I was told they would not give me leave and had they had known when I started, they would not have employed me anyway.

I quit and mum was so glad. It worried her that when I came home I barely spoke and went straight to bed.

For the record the job was cutting off thread from skirts, no talking allowed. It was hell..

Sounds like HR didn’t actually firm this up with your manager. A ‘yeah, that should be fine’ doesn’t sound very binding and not really their place to ok it without liaising with the relevant department. Did they give you this in writing?

It's not crazy, is it? You started a job without getting your annual leave authorised in writing. That's no one's fault but your own.

@NoBaggyPants, she did get it in writing. Why didn't you just ask, instead of making an unflattering assumption and having a swipe on that basis?

OP the manager is being ridiculous. Talk to HR, as you are doing. If annual leave was agreed and that was the basis on which you took the job, then the manager's being disgraceful. Team playing doesn't mean cancelling your wedding for a temp job! It would in fact mean supporting a team member so they can enjoy their wedding, surely.

OP, at 16.41: I have the email back from HR before I started the job confirming my annual leave was okay.

She got it in writing.

@Biggobyboo so what happened today??

@LightsInOtherPeoplesHouses what on Earth was your job??

I’d quit and make HR are fully aware of the reasons why... manager will wish they’d just agreed the holiday!

Definitely notify HR of this unreasonable behaviour on your manager's part. Secure the time off for your wedding with HR and continue there but actively look elsewhere. I don't think anyone could succeed working for someone with this attitude. You have one career and you owe it to yourself to work for people who value you.

Your annual leave has been confirmed by HR. Don’t say anymore and take your annual leave as planned. Hand in your notice the day before you leave.

I’d keep going until you find another job or until just before your wedding. Max out your staff discount and then hand in your notice the week before stating why. I think that’s honest and transparent, while at the same time benefitting you and landing your manager with some tough questions to face.

This actually got my heart rate up. I really can't believe someone can be this stupid. Leave and don't look back. This takes crazy on a new level

Okay, a few clarifications:-

1. An employer can dictate when annual leave can be and could cancel it... but in this instance you absolutely wouldn't and an employee could take out a civil suit for loss as there is an email confirmation. Besides, on balance of probability, would you fail to tell a new employer about leave you needed for your own wedding.

2. It's not HR's fault that leave clashed. You wouldn't recruit on the basis that someone else might have the same holiday week.

3. There is no law that says you have to be granted a day off for your wedding or that you get an extra days' leave. If you're an existing employee, normal rules apply, a joining employee, no Manager in their right mind would refuse in this scenario.

4. You can't bring a constructive dismissal claim without 2 years service.

To be honest though , this Manager sounds like an arse. Personally, I'd go in as contracted and serve my contractual notice, but their only remedy if you chose to just never turn up again would bevto sue for breach of contract and you would have to pay them notice. It's never goingvto happen as legal costs woild exc

Would exceed.

Finally, you do have to be paid for the work you have completed and if they withold, you phone acas and raise an early conciliation for breach of contract.

@Biggobyboo - how was today?

Why are you even asking? Just quit. I’m sure there’s plenty of other pin money jobs you could get. What a stupid attitude the manager has.

@Biggobyboo I’ve worked for various brands . As a manager and assistant , I’m assuming your in a department store ? I would go and speak to your department manager as they can provide some sort of cover for the counter with department store staff, Although your manager ( counter ) is in charge of the rota she/he doesn’t have the authority if your area manager / H.R has already given you annual leave .
Counters are often left unmanned and it just means that targets won’t be hit , I would speak to your area manager and your department store manager and explain the situation, they can draft in cover staff if need be .