How do I ignore her without being rude?

[jess24x8]

I posted a picture of my finished living room on facebook and a lady that added me a few months ago that I used to go to school with(yet never spoke though) now won't stop messaging me. She's asking about whether we rent or whether we bought, how much we pay, where it's located, etc. I've been very quite blunt as I do t tent to ignore people but find it very intimidating as we are just acquaintances and it's really none of her business plus I'm not an open person to start with anyway. She has now proceeded to tell me that I should turn to the council and start claiming benefits like she does instead of paying so much for our house??? I kindly but bluntly responded and said that we are not entitled to anything due to how much we earn. (Instead of being rude and saying that I do not wish to claim benefits as we have more than enough money without them). She is now being pushy and asking me if I work then which I replied with 'yes' and she's now won't leave me alone and is asking where I work, how much I earn, Etc. I DO NOT WANT TO TELL HER THIS INFORMATION. When I don't respond, she double or triple messages me until I do. I don't know what to do. I don't want to block or unfriend her as we have a lot of mutual friends, don't want to be rude but also need to kindly tell her to p*ss off...

If you want to stick with such flimsy reasons not to block her, not much you can do about it. Ignore her and seem rude or block her, those are your options.

I genuinely don’t understand why people are so scared of upsetting others who don’t give a shit about them. I see this so much on here, and I wish someone would explain it to me.

This woman harasses you OP and doesn’t give a damn how it makes you feel, so why on earth are you spending time worrying about how to not be “rude” to her?

Block her

SHE the rude one - BLOCK!!

Your questions are too personal sorry.

I wouldn't berate OP too much about Friending someone she doesn't know - I have a job that requires much publicity so I tend to 'Friend' practically anyone who request it - then block or delete them if they overstep the mark (men and their persistent 'hi, how are you's being case in point).

You don't have to be rude, OP, if it upsets you to be, just message the lady, tell her that you've found her messages to be rather intrusive and you don't feel comfortable answering her. If she keeps up asking, even after you've nicely told her this, then you can block her seven ways to Sunday in the assurance that she doesn't understand social niceties and will carry on pushing.

FFS, just block her! Who gives a shit if you have mutual friends? You don't even know her and you'll literally never have to speak to her in real life so it doesn't matter if you offend her. She won't get a message saying she's been blocked - as far as she's concerned it will just look like your profile no longer exists, ie that you've deleted.

I blocked a former colleague a while ago because on Facebook I found her awkward and intrusive. We have about 20 mutual friends and not one of them has even noticed that I blocked her, and I doubt she has either.

What a lot of waffle.

Just block her. No need for all the hand wringing. Block her and job done.

@jess24x8

Seriously, why can you not just unfriend and block her???

I don't understand why even if you don't want to block etc that you wouldn't respond by saying "With respect", "that's our business and nobody else's".

How is that rude in any way? It's not "rude" not to tell someone highly personal information.

Even my best friends don't know how much I earn etc.

Even my mother doesn't come to that.

So some random acquaintance from years gone by? Um no.

Definitely block her. She's a nosey cow and you don't have to put up with her interrogation.

Well you threw down the gauntlet by answering her initial rude intrusive questions so it’s not like she’s doing anything out of the ordinary by asking more.

Just tell her now that your uncomfortable as you don’t know her too well and the questions are now too personal. Then ignore her.

Tell her that she's rude and she shouldn't be asking strangers (or anyone- as a matter of fact) about their private life, income, etc.

So basically you have shown a near-stranger a picture of the inside of your house, and now she's working out whether there could be anything valuable in it, and exactly where it is, and you are answering her questions.

And your worry is whether you are being rude?

Just unfriend. If you don't want her to see your photos, or use lists.

I don't really know why people get so scared of hitting the "unfriend" button for people who aren't their bosom buddies. Am I missing something?

Does she have SEN? I'm asking because there's a lady at my church who does this kind of thing - adds people on facebook whom she's never met but are friend of her friends, and tries desperately to make friends with them. She doesn't have the social skills to realise that frequent personal questions and comments are intrusive and upset people.

I find her really, really hard work, but try to be kind because I know she doesn't have any real friends and is very isolated. It's tough though.

If you have told her the address, you should install a burglar alarm ASAP. Maybe also "mention" that you are part of a neighbourhood watch scheme before you block her. Her asking a total stranger about benefits and her job situation make a lot more sense if you see it as someone casing out your home for a potential break-in.

Why are you even asking?

Block or unfriend her. If your mutual friends get involved and ask why, just tell them.

Honestly, stand up for yourself.

I’m sorry, OP, but do you literally have no idea how to deal with this?

How on earth do you manage your day-to-day life?

Just stop communicating with her!

"Hi Nosy Acquaintance - can you stop bombarding me with questions, I can't imagine why you would need to know all these details, & want you to stop being so rude & intrusive. Bye now - Jess"

& BLOCK.
Job done.

Then stop overthinking this daft situation or worrying about being "nice" to Nosy.
Sorted.

God almighty, I would have unfriended her after the 2nd comment and not given it a second thought.

don't want to be rude but also need to kindly tell her to pss off... confused* Why?? Just unfriend and move on.

It's bizarre the way some people get social media confused with real life.

I don't understand why you started engaging with her, from the first cheeky questions about benefits you should have blocked her or said "That's a cheeky personal question, I won't discuss our private circumstances." You can still use that sentence now, or similar "Way too many personal questions from you now, leave it there please. I won't discuss any more about our private circumstances." Once you've been clear, if she continues then block her. Sort out your privacy settings so all and sundry can't see everything you put and only accept friend requests from people who are actually friends.

We have a male version of this person from my school year. He’d added all the women from school and then would message them even though nobody had really spoken to him at school or since. One day a mutual friend put up a status about how she’d blocked him and everyone was commenting with a story to tell. I think he was blocked by everyone after that. I bet if you ask around this weirdo isn’t just doing it to you. Block away.

Shes making it clear to you that she doesn't acknowledge any boundaries, the only response is to tell her your boundaries, and add a warning.

Like, I have found your repeated requests for personal information intrusive, these are things I might chose to discuss with close friends only. Can I please ask that you stop, if you don't I will have to restrict my fb access to you.

I don't think you have to be rude, but you are asking what you can/should do. Most don't block people on fb without very good cause, if she has a warning and continues, thats good cause to block, or restrict at the very least. That would be treating her fairly.