What on earth is this mealtime snobbery about?

[Diemme]

At 6.45 this evening, DH and I went to sit outside at front of the house to have a coffee and enjoy the last of the sun - we live in a close with benches outside the houses. Almost immediately our neighbours came back from a dog walk. They chatted for a few minutes and then she said she was going in to make dinner. I mentioned just in small talk that we'd already eaten. And I swear she did a head tilt and tinkly laugh as she said gosh that's early. Then she went inside and her husband arranged his face in a sort of patronising / pitiful expression and asked why we'd eaten so early. It's not just them, ive come across it loads of times. It's as if there's a bizarre sense of superiority to eating at 8 rather than say 6.

How do all the family eat together at 5pm (regardless of what you call it)? I’m left wondering when the meal gets cooked if both parents work and what jobs the father does to be home by 5:00pm in time to change and wash for supper if it’s cooked by a stay at home mother? Most people work until at least 5:30pm or later and then have travel home, surely?

What do they get changed into?

Well their smoking jackets obviously.....!

Or perhaps a lounge suit, depending on the mood....

Why actually gives a fuck when anyone eats! It's hardly going to change your world or theirs. Not having a go at OP. Just can't beleive the petty 1st world issue from the neighbour. Eat when hungry, end of story.

Who... Not why

What do they get changed into?

In fairness, lots of Mumsnetters refer casually to bolting in the door from work, ripping off their bras in the hallway, and getting straight into their pyjamas. I personally find this quite odd unless you wear a really ill-fitting bra and go to bed very early, but perhaps this the 'changing for dinner' that CherryPavlova is referring to, rather than donning evening dress while sipping a cocktail.

Absolutely not. I’m rather thinking that father’s might want to take their suit and tie off and put on something more comfortable for supper. Few people are going to eat supper in their cuff links are they?

Clearly different if it’s a dinner.

I couldn't possibly eat at 5-6pm I'd be starving before bed

This makes absolutely no sense. If you're eating at 8 or later, you've possibly gone 8 or more hours since a smaller meal at lunch time. If you can go that entire time, surely you can go 4/5 hours after eating the largest meal of the day before sleep?

And if you have a 'light snack' in the middle of lunch and dinner then you absolutely need to remove your snobbery about supper. Which, yes, absolutely is a small snack before bed.

OP is 100% right about this I've come across several people who think they're better than you because they eat late.

You burn less of the calories off if you eat later. How many late eaters are obese I wonder?

Surely that would depend on the size of the meal eaten as well? Might not be a lot of food.

@LaMarschallin

(If they're reading "Rivals" for the 20th time they're me. Do come and say "Hello" and buy me a huge drink)

I love that book. It has really dated but I still love to reread it.

You burn less of the calories off if you eat later. How many late eaters are obese I wonder?

so basically you eat earlier so you can eat more calories??? Surely you just eat less and later, save money and the planet?

@KatherineJaneway

I love it too and it's a comfort read for me. I know it doesn't stand up well in this politically correct age though.

We must meet up in Baz's wine bar, get tight over lunch and be terribly indiscreet.

You can't miss me. I'll be the one drenched in scent and with smudged eyeliner. And my fringe will separate and smell of bacon.

If you're a two parent working family, I believe the issue arises because it's presumed you haven't had time to prepare a proper home cooked meal and you're eating ready meals. Evidently that's not entirely accurate.

5pm would be too early for most. I said 6pm as I work locally to where I live. My Husband is Senior but doesn't wear a suit. Most of the business men I know don't wear ties and cuff links.

I suppose if you work in the city etc then you wouldn't eat till later and would need to change.

I really want to read Rivals now

I really want to read Rivals now

Oh you must!

Then you, KatherineJaneway and I could all meet up at the Bar Sinister, play "Rivals" bingo (where you have a drink every time one of the characters does) and see who falls off their bar stool first.

I must admit, I cringed when my neighbours proudly installed a wrought iron garden bench in their front garden. It’s South facing though so I see why they were tempted. Cant be seen from the road thankfully.

I eat breakfast between 8am and 9am, lunch between 12 and 1 pm.

I eat dinner anywhere between 6.30 pm and 7.30 pm when Im at home and between 7.30 pm and 8.30 pm if I’m away/on holiday. Earlier if I’m working out / exercising late.

I cant imagine eating after 8.30 pm/9 pm every day. The food would still be digesting at bedtime. Speaking of which, those of you who eat late, how on earth do you go to bed and have sex on a full stomach? and why arent you hungry between lunch and dinner (9 hours!)

The lunch and dinner debate - what a minefield - particularly oop North . First day with new work colleagues- I’d been told to act more in the role of supervisor . On asking when everyone planned to take their lunch break I got the response “We eat us dinners at us desks”

I’m dying to know where this is MrsRufusdog Is it Leeds? Ive not come across that turn on phrase before.

I eat late but I'm not obese or overweight. In fact sometimes i wait so late to eat (if waiting for DH to come home or if I've been out to exercise) that i can't be bothered any more and then eat a snack rather than a meal.

We eat at 6pm and nothing else afterwards for me. I'm in bed by 10pm. But my sister, friend and a neighbour eat around 9pm, they're all slim and I'm overweight. Maybe eating late is better for you? Who knows?!

@LaMarschallin

We must meet up in Baz's wine bar, get tight over lunch and be terribly indiscreet.

You can't miss me. I'll be the one drenched in scent and with smudged eyeliner. And my fringe will separate and smell of bacon.

😂🤣😂

Speaking of which, those of you who eat late, how on earth do you go to bed and have sex on a full stomach? shock and why arent you hungry between lunch and dinner (9 hours!)

What’s wrong with having sex on a full stomach? Have you never had sex after dinner out or anything like that? The contents of my stomach have no impact on my sexual activity!
And it’s not 9 hours from lunch to dinner, as I say my lunch around 3pm.

In fact, have you never had sex after breakfast? Or after lunch? I’m baffled by this idea that you can only have sex on an empty stomach

Some people, you know, have inflexible, long-hours jobs, or lengthy commutes. Dinner on the table at 5pm?

I used to start work at 4.30 am and get home about 3.30pm. I was ravenous by 6pm. Lots of people work hours when 5/6pm would be the 'right' time for them to eat.

I don't really understand the 'what do people do in the evening if they eat at around 6pm' comments. Lots of things. 😁 Go to the pub, cinema, go and see friends, watch TV, read. Anything you like.

How do all the family eat together at 5pm (regardless of what you call it)? I’m left wondering when the meal gets cooked if both parents work and what jobs the father does to be home by 5:00pm in time to change and wash for supper if it’s cooked by a stay at home mother? Most people work until at least 5:30pm or later and then have travel home, surely?
I am staggered firstly there is thread on this we all have very different routines based on our own circumstances but as it is asked above. Mon to fri I eat about 5.30 with my kids. I work part-time so can have it ready by then. I am in Ireland so kids don't get dinner at school only small lunch so are starving come 5pm. They also do sports a few evenings a week so need their dinner before they go. My dh comes home anytime between 6 to 8 so re-heats dinner then. We all eat later and together at weekends. Ps we call it dinner. If we happen to have dinner in the middle of the day like a Sunday roast we would call when we eat in the evening "Tea" and if kids happen to have cereal or toast later they call it supper but never heard that word being posh. We don't have the class thing in Ireland at all seems a very English thing

I must admit, I cringed when my neighbours proudly installed a wrought iron garden bench in their front garden.

Why is it wrong to sit in your front garden? From what I understand Americans sit on their porches all the time?