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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to ask someone not to block me in my driveway?

56 replies

Leona11 · 24/08/2019 11:57

I had to go knocking round all of my neighbours this morning before 0930 as someone blocked me into my drive and I couldn’t get out for work. The same car has blocked me a good few times before but as I wasn’t in a rush, I didn’t do anything. I’m super stressed about work right now (really affecting the awful anxiety I manage on a daily basis) and I’m worried that I have been cheeky.

The car turned out to belong to a carer - when she answered the door, she said ‘Oh yeah I’m blocking you’. I said that in future perhaps she could knock to check I’m not about to leave the house or leave a quick note on her windscreen to let me know how long she’d be, as a courtesy, as it happens a lot. She seemed to really take a huff and I could hear her moaning about me to someone on the phone although she moved the car. I’m not one of those people that would complain about an ambulance etc at my door of course, but for routine, everyday visits, AIBU to have said this to her? Thanks so much for your views!

OP posts:
Mummyoflittledragon · 24/08/2019 12:44

Do you have to get out every day at the same time? If you do, letting her park there at that time isn’t doing her any favours because it will take her as long to park a minute away as to move the car iyswim. Therefore I would do as others have said and tell her not to park there. It is illegal to block a car in.

DGRossetti · 24/08/2019 12:48

I said that in future perhaps she could knock to check I’m not about to leave the house or leave a quick note on her windscreen to let me know how long she’d be, as a courtesy, as it happens a lot

I'll add to the advice that the best response is that there will be no "next time". End of.

If I were inclined to be sympathetic, it would have been from the point where the driver of the blocking car knocked on my door immediately having parked, explaining the situation before fucking off and leaving me wondering WTF?. Generally it's true that it's easier to get forgiveness than permission. But part of being a grown up is knowing the few times the reverse is true - and this is almost a textbook situation.

Nanny0gg · 24/08/2019 12:48

She's a carer not an ambulance.

She shouldn't park there at all. I understand she can't afford to lose any time but that's not your problem.

melissasummerfield · 24/08/2019 12:49

You are far too nice OP Smile

I get blocked in by rude parents a lot ( live by a school ) and i go completely mental when they come back after dropping their idle children off. If i want to go out of my house I don't want to wait for someone to come back and move their car!

ChicCroissant · 24/08/2019 12:54

Complain to the agency if it happens again - they get such limited time with the clients I can see why they try and park as close as possible, but you shouldn't be blocked in.

DGRossetti · 24/08/2019 12:57

She's a carer not an ambulance.

Of course, to play devils advocate, we all know how shit carers pay is and how care providers squeeze travelling time outside of paid hours. So forcing the carer to spend an extra few minutes on what is effectively travelling time could actually represent a significant financial loss.

Turning things around, I'd be curious about the possibility of seeing about charging for the use of the space and getting Megabucks Care Corp to stump up for it as a parking expense.

Probably not likely to go anywhere, but not a great investment to find out.

BoneyBackJefferson · 24/08/2019 13:08

DGRossetti

Without knowing how the OP is paid, being parked in could represent a financial loss for her as well.

CallmeAngelina · 24/08/2019 13:08

The OP is not "forcing" the carer to do anything. This is not (or rather should not be) her problem.

Tonnerre · 24/08/2019 13:09

If she does it again, I suggest you put a note on saying that you've tried to be reasonable but if there is any repetition you will be taking it up with her employers and the police.

AncoraAmarena · 24/08/2019 13:09

You need to knock on the door and get her to move her car every time she does it. EVERY time.

Don't let her get away with it even one more time, otherwise she will just carry on and be happy to take the risk.

Drabarni · 24/08/2019 13:13

Get a back bone and tell her it's illegal and if she does it again you're calling the Police.

crazycatgal · 24/08/2019 13:16

YABU to tell her she can knock and ask. You should have told her to stop blocking your drive way.

SavingSpaces2019 · 24/08/2019 13:18

i have cheekyfuckers constantly parking on the double yellows outside my flat.
I'm on the ground floor of a tenement so when they park there it casts a shadow and i get no light in through my windows - and it blocks my view of outside.
People get an attitude when you ask them politely to not park there.
So now i just take a picture of their car parked illegally and send it off to the Council.....every single time.

One woman parked her car there and buggered off on holiday for a week!
So i took a picture every single day it was there - and i wish i was there to see the look on her face when she came home to hundreds of pounds worth of parking fines Grin
She's never done it since!

Drum2018 · 24/08/2019 13:18

YANBU. You've stood up for yourself this once so you can do it again if the bitch dares to block your drive again.

Juells · 24/08/2019 13:21

Start with a normal post-it note, work up to full-faced super glue. Start to the side of the windscreen, gradually move to the dead centre.

Don't know about the UK, but I know that here (Ireland) a local university was forced to stop sticking notices on cars, as they were a danger. It's all very well doing something like that, but you don't want to cause a crash by limiting the vision of a driver.

The carer was being an arse. Stand up for yourself.

bluebluezoo · 24/08/2019 13:23

*So now i just take a picture of their car parked illegally and send it off to the Council.....every single time.

One woman parked her car there and buggered off on holiday for a week!
So i took a picture every single day it was there - and i wish i was there to see the look on her face when she came home to hundreds of pounds worth of parking fines grin
She's never done it since!*

Do the council issue fines based on a photo? I've never managed to get them to do it, and every time I've phoned the buggers have left before they send someone out to issue the fine.

DGRossetti · 24/08/2019 13:28

Without knowing how the OP is paid, being parked in could represent a financial loss for her as well.

I wish I'd posted in defence of the OP now.

Oh, hang on. I did Hmm .....

BoneyBackJefferson · 24/08/2019 13:33

DGRossetti

What is the point of playing devils advocate if you don't want a counter argument?

fuzzyduck1 · 24/08/2019 13:34

If they block you in you can call the police and they will get the car moved check if your blocked in before you go to bed then the offending car can be gone befor you get up.

Or get some nudge bars on your car and just push it out the way in the morning

DGRossetti · 24/08/2019 13:40

What is the point of playing devils advocate if you don't want a counter argument?

But why did I need a counter argument ? I argued for the OP, and I also suggested another way forward, depending on the OPs situation and/or the carers situation (neither of which I have a clue about). That's both sides of the argument, surely. If you don't like my second POV, then I already gave a contrary one initially.

Admittedly there are probably much wider issues underlying the OPs problem. Provision of off road parking, policing of existing on street parking, wages and employment practices in the care industry, reliance on private motor transport over public transport, and the nature of social interaction in 21st century Britain. All of which need attention and discussion. But there's only one of me, and I really wanted to get off and watch some catch up TV this afternoon Grin ....

justasking111 · 24/08/2019 13:41

In our cul de sac, a carer three times a day was causing havoc, our neighbour went to the house owner and asked why the carer did not park in his large drive. He said he wasn`t having that, no carers allowed on his land in their cars. This carer looks after his wife who really does need the care because he does sod all. Retired chief inspector, so you would think he might be a little more intelligent.

PurpleHedges · 24/08/2019 13:44

Yanbu at all.

SavingSpaces2019 · 24/08/2019 13:45

I'm in Scotland Blue so not sure what it's like elsewhere in the UK.
I fill out an online form and attach the picture.
It's working so far so something has happened Grin

SavingSpaces2019 · 24/08/2019 13:47

but you don't want to cause a crash by limiting the vision of a driver
Well if the driver's vision is so poor that they can't see a note/paper on their windscreen BEFORE they start driving then they really shouldn't be driving in the first place Grin

BoneyBackJefferson · 24/08/2019 13:48

DGRossetti

Its just another point being made, the loss of one person's money isn't balanced by someone else's.

Even if the solution that you posted was available, being late for work will/could still cause the OP no end of problems.

Yes there are many issues that need to be solved but they are not the OP's issues, she just needs to get to work without being blocked in.