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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be gutted the holidays are nearly over?

53 replies

PictureWall · 23/08/2019 08:01

I love the school holidays. I love spending time with the kids. I save my annual leave and take most of it in the summer holidays and it’s so much fun all hanging out together without schedules, play dates, routines.

So many of my friends and people I follow on social media complain about the school holidays. They seem to wish them away.

I’m just sad about how quickly the holidays go and how quickly my kids are growing up. Soon we won’t spend holidays together. My eldest turned 13 and I can see their focus turning outwards towards friends already. This time last year seems so recent, time flies and that saddens me.

Does anyone else just love the kids being off school, love the lack of routine, the freedom to do what you want and not wish it away?

OP posts:
megletthesecond · 23/08/2019 09:38

Sorry, it's not fun here. The kids don't like holiday clubs on the days I work and I don't get a break all 6 weeks.
They build dens, play out, we go on cycle rides and to museums all year round. Summer hols are a pain.

ilovesooty · 23/08/2019 09:38

@TreacherousPissFlap that is a lovely post. Your son sounds great and I hope he continues to come on in leaps and bounds.

SpeedyShutter · 23/08/2019 09:44

I hate the summer holidays. I dread them every year. I love my children but get really fed up with their noise, mess and almost constant bickering. I'm fed up of having to feed them. I thrive on routine and the idea of having to fill whole days kills me, even if it's a whole day of watching TV and chores. I feel like a house maid and it's driving me mad.

I have 2dc and I work part time as a supply teacher.

Ravenblack · 23/08/2019 10:06

YANBU. I used to LOVE the school holidays with my kids, and hated them going back. We did LOADS during the holidays, had lots of fun, and started planning the 6 weeks summer holiday, in MAY...

I feel really sad when people say that they dread the school holidays because they don't know what to do with their kids and they annoy them and they look forward to them going back to school, and so on....

Some people have children and I don't know why they had them! They seem to have very little interest in them, and get irritated by every single thing they do. Sad

SpeedyShutter · 23/08/2019 14:41

Some people have children and I don't know why they had them! They seem to have very little interest in them, and get irritated by every single thing they do.

Some people had children without realising quite how much life would change, especially if their children have additional needs. Some people had children and then, for whatever reason, their finances changed and they can't afford to do loads of activities over such a long period of time. Some people have children who they love with all their being but, after being on their own with multiple children day after day for a very long time crave time on their own. There's nothing wrong with admitting that you're struggling; it is wrong however to make them feel even worse for doing so.

formerbabe · 23/08/2019 14:45

Some people have children and I don't know why they had them! They seem to have very little interest in them, and get irritated by every single thing they do

I have plenty of interest in my dc. I just find it exhausting and intense to spend every single day with them for six weeks without a single break, with the pressure of entertaining them on a limited budget with very little family and friends to spend time with.

formerbabe · 23/08/2019 14:46

Some people have children and I don't know why they had them! They seem to have very little interest in them, and get irritated by every single thing they do

And I have always found people who say shit like this are the people with hoards of available family to help out.

formerbabe · 23/08/2019 14:50

Two hypothetical examples...

A wealthy sahm with a nt child, huge garden, car, holidays abroad, lots of family to help out

A single mum living in an inner city tower block with three kids who have sn, limited budget, no car.

Hmmmm...let's guess which one of my examples would love the holidays?!

Does it make them a better mum? No, it makes them a mum with a better life.

AnnPerkins · 23/08/2019 14:52

I don't love the holidays. I work from home so don't have any childcare issues but I can't take DS out anywhere, he has to amuse himself if none of his friends are around to play with.

He hasn't complained but I think he's really looking forward to seeing his schoolfriends in a couple of weeks.

MyGhastIsFlabbered · 23/08/2019 14:52

I hate it-DCs have spent 2 weeks with their dad and I feel like I've hardly seen them. I can't believe they've only got a week left. And I'm working fir most of it. Sad

U2HasTheEdge · 23/08/2019 14:56

I don't know where the time has gone.

I hate it when the summer holidays end too.

I work PT and have had 13 days off work and no uni. I love the late nights, lazy mornings, getting up whenever you like and the lack of routine. I do find it harder going into work in the holidays because I want to be at home more.

Hullabaloo31 · 23/08/2019 14:57

I've enjoyed them, my childcare set up for work is much easier in the holidays as it's the early school finish that's a real pain for me. And no clubs etc to pick up/drop off for a bit. And no homework/spellings etc etc, just reading for fun.

We've also been fairly lucky with the weather on my days off, so lots of inexpensive fun.

Flower777 · 23/08/2019 15:02

I find at the start of the holidays (we get 10
Weeks here) they stretch ahead and seem a bit daunting. Half way through I start to struggle and resent the lack of me
Time, but by this point I’m really used to it, and love it, and am sad that they are over.

Although I do quite like it when we are all back in the routine of school and work too and autumn comes.

So a big bag of
Mixed
Feelings from me!

ChicCroissant · 23/08/2019 15:05

Love the summer holidays, YANBU OP!

Tequila the M5 going southbound is terrible today, we've been to Cribbs and skipped a Costco trip because we could see that it was stop-start by lunchtime (it is a Bank Holiday weekend though). Hope you get home OK.

Ravenblack · 23/08/2019 15:48

ravenblack

Some people have children and I don't know why they had them! They seem to have very little interest in them, and get irritated by every single thing they do..

@formerbabe

And I have always found people who say shit like this are the people with hoards of available family to help out.

Nope, not me. Never had anyone to help. Parents lived 100s of miles away when mine were little, and other extended family and friends lived far away or had full time jobs/busy careers. Me and DH did it all ourselves.

I usually find it's the opposite of what you are saying. The people who get irked and irritated by their kids in the school holidays, are often the ones who palm them off a lot on their parents/sister/grandparents, or their in-laws etc... Because they have 'better' things to do like going to the gym, playing sport, going clothes shopping, going to a hobby group, getting their nails/hair/spray-tan done, going to the pub with their mates, and partying etc etc etc..........

So when they actually have to spend time with their OWN children, they can't cope/have no patience/can't wait to get rid of them.

Sounds like my comments hit a raw nerve with a few people.

There is nothing smug about actually enjoying the company of your own children, and loving spending lots of time with them. Some of just do Smile

Hopefully the children of the people who get irked by them easily don't pick up on it. Knowing they are resented/in the way etc, can have a lasting effect on children.

Georgiemcgeorgeface · 23/08/2019 15:59

Yes! I love love love it. Even though I still have to work a lot of it. I love not having the routine of the school run/ uniform / packed lunch etc. We feel free. We eat when we want. Sleep when we want. On my days off we can get up and do whatever takes our fancy. My DC is relaxed. I'm relaxed. Please can we not go back??

Sockwomble · 23/08/2019 16:01

"There is nothing smug about actually enjoying the company of your own children, and loving spending lots of time with them. Some of just do."

Can you not think of situations where people might have it harder than you or is that just beyond you?

Izzydizzy01 · 23/08/2019 16:07

Sorry I'm typing here just mumsnet keeps logging me out when I create a post Hmm. Wanted to see if I could post. but I agree/disagree. Sad the kids will be back to school but will be looking forward to a break with being a single mum not at work it's hard long days sometimes.

drsausage · 23/08/2019 16:14

I love the summer holidays - we have nearly 12 weeks and I'm still sad when it ends.

But I recognise that I'm privileged to be able to enjoy them with my kids. We are well off, I work from home to (mostly) my own schedule, my kids have no special needs, we have a car, garden, and access to lots of lovely things to do.

SpeedyShutter · 23/08/2019 16:35

There is nothing smug about actually enjoying the company of your own children, and loving spending lots of time with them. Some of just do

No, the "smugness" comes from refusing to see that other people's lives aren't as easy or as rosy as yours. You might have the time and the money to do LOADS during the holidays but I don't. It's no-one else's fault of course but it does mean that we're stuck with the few cheap/free things that we can easily get to and then, due to my ds's adhd and potential asd, we have to leave before long because he can't cope with the crowds and the noise. It does get kind of monotonous when you have to repeat the same few activities over & over again and your other child hasn't much choice but to accept it and go along with it. This of course then leads to friction and so the arguments begin. Who likes staying in the house trying to sort out arguments and fights day after day after day? I don't. I am looking forward to the day when I can leave the house, go somewhere I like that ds doesn't, and not have to cope with the fallout afterwards.

whattodowith · 23/08/2019 16:38

YANBU. I usually find it quite exhausting and difficult but this year has been fantastic. I think it’s because they’re getting older now so get lots of enjoyment out of the activities I plan, they’re also better at entertaining themselves Wink.

Baguetteaboutit · 23/08/2019 16:44

I do love the six week holidays but thankful that they're not the twelve week holidays mentioned above.

I think I'm too energetic off the starting block, far too organised and enthusiastically ticking off amazing days out. I've ground down to a slow burn by the fifth week.

InvisibleWomenMustBeRead · 23/08/2019 16:54

I agree Op - absolutely love the school holidays. I just wish it were longer as 6 weeks is no way long enough - I grew up in NI and we had 9 weeks and I think that's the perfect length for summer!

ChicCroissant · 23/08/2019 17:10

No family to help out here either, just us - we relocated for work, family hundreds of miles away.

My (single) mum loved the holidays too.

formerbabe · 23/08/2019 17:23

Who likes staying in the house trying to sort out arguments and fights day after day after day

Well apparently, everyone else lives in this idyllic world of den making and pj/duvet days. My dc would be climbing the walls and fighting like stray cats if we had a duvet day!

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