To think that if you work part time it’s obvious you won’t have as much money as someone who works full time!!??

[Backtosxhool]

I am fed up of this...having a rant! SIL is always saying “oh it’s well for you!” Because we go on holidays, have the house extended etc etc
I work full time!! As does dh (nearly 70 per week sometimes)
She works....15 hours!!! Well of course she’s bloody broke she barely works a day a week WHAT does she expect! And her dh is the same...works 25 hours and that’s it! Won’t take on overtime!! They are constantly saying “oh well you have money!” Its alright for you when your well paid!! I am going to go insane!! I’m sorry but I know some ppl have it tough, but we work all the hours we can (we have 2 dc too) and save as much as we can. They don’t even TRY yet I am the one expected to feel bad! Aibu here!! Preparing to be flamed but I really am just fed up!!! They have no dc by the way...but...they are TTC! (A whooole other thread)

Yanbu. Entirely different when someone wants to work ft and the jobs aren’t available or their health prevents it.

But what would I know, I must get the mythical single parent benefit on top of my salary. It can’t be anything to do with the fact one full time salary, goes further on one adult than two part time salaries on two adults. And of course fitting childcare round work when you’re on your own is so much easier than juggling it between two of you.

@Chocolateandamaretto they don’t have dc though!!

My sister is exactly the same. She's jealous as hell that we have nice holidays, a decent car, nicer house than her, but we both work full time in our business (often weekends too, plus evenings), but she only works 3 days per week even though she's no childcare nor other commitments preventing her from working longer.

@flashingbeacon that’s awful! Your poor dsis. I know someone who had a severe car accident that meant he could no longer continue in his line of work. He got a substantial payout and bought a house, and people were mithering at him about how easy he had it getting a handout....like that’s his loss of earnings because someone else fucked his career! So damn insensitive!

I know someone like this as well. Works part time, complains she is broke, but when you say that she could get a full time job she says she needs to be home for the kids. The kids are all in their late teens!!

@Backtosxhool yes I do think in your SILs case they are probably just lazy! Just wanted to point out that isn’t true for everyone though :-)

Why do they work PT if they have no kids? Do they have disabilities that stop them working more?

The opposite is also annoying - those who have to work full time stressful jobs to keep up a lifestyle with holidays and extensions feeling hard done by. While we had a lower income due a SAHP we cut our cloth accordingly so life was less stressful, but still financially comfortable. When it’s a choice it’s very irritating when people moan and compare to your situation, also the result of choices.

Is there a reason for their hours? If not and she starts up again just say 'yeah but we have to work so many more hours than you. I think you're so lucky!'

@Witchinaditch no major disabilities, she has asthma but that’s exacerbated by the fact that she is overweight. It’s not even THAT bad to be honest. She does even carry an inhaler.

Your ability or inclination to work "full time" hours does not increase your value as a human being, and nor does working fewer hours reduce it.

If she becomes confrontational with you perhaps it is because your judgemental and superior attitude comes across in person too.

YANBU. They have a choice.

YANBU. They sound quite lazy working those hours, especially with no DC yet!

YANBU. If she wants more money then she needs to work more hours.

Just reply every single time, well I work full time, of course I earn more money.......

If she chooses to only work part time when she has no DC then she has made a lifestyle choice that she won't work many hours, therefore she has chosen to not earn much money.

Sort of different but I often feel annoyed when friends are jealous that I appear wealthier than them or book another holiday or get a new car.

When they were sleeping all day at uni I was dragging a pallet up and down a warehouse saving, when they got a brand new car on finance I was driving my old bangers, when they were buying designer clothes I was overpaying every penny I had on my mortgage, I paid my dues by maki g sensible choices when I was younger

I used to have a friend who would always put me and DH down for having money- which we didn't even have at the time because he was in uni again. DH has gone to uni for 9 years and now earns a very good wage. I have worked very hard at my profession to get where I am now. She'll work a day a week then phone in sick and then quit or get fired and used to constantly say you don't understand etc. She would never ever ever work as hard as me or DH ever so why should we be made to feel bad! Completely agree with you OP

I have similar with some of the people at work " Oh you're so lucky to own your own home, car etc." I mean, you say lucky, I say it's not really lucky that I worked 20 hours a week whilst at uni, and 70 + in the holidays, DH did the same, whilst you lot were all out drinking four nights a week. We went without a lot to be in this position but you'd think we were just handed it. I'd definitely say as much next time she brings it up!

Yanbu.
I used to get the reverse. I work 3 days a week around my dc & caring for a disabled family member.
Full timer at work was always “well it’s ok for you, you only have to turn up 3 days a week!”

K.

Your ability or inclination to work "full time" hours does not increase your value as a human being, and nor does working fewer hours reduce it.

If she becomes confrontational with you perhaps it is because your judgemental and superior attitude comes across in person too.

Oh the irony of describing the OP as judgemental and with a superior attitude.

OP does she ever talk about things they've done, days out or just a walk? If she does, then I recommend the MN headtilt and you saying 'oh that's very well for you, we're at work'. And if she replies that you too could cut your hours, then you say 'but if we cut back we couldn't go on holiday or have the house extended.'

Really she's jealous of the things you have and can do, but doesn't want to do the work to get them. There's no money tree and the tooth fairy isn't that generous!

Your ability or inclination to work "full time" hours does not increase your value as a human being, and nor does working fewer hours reduce it.

Ability, no. Not everyone is capable.

Inclination, yes it fucking well does. Unless you're self sufficient and not relying on the rest of society to prop you up.

Is your elbow stuck on the ! key?

As for your SIL, it is quite clear you don't like her and look down upon her. Don't see her, then you won't have to "Seeth" anymore nor burn your eyes by looking at her wheezing fat arse!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Depends on whether someone has kids. I work part-time to fit round my DH job. If I worked full-time and put children in childcare we would be worse off.

One person working 25 hours and the other working 15 is about equivalent to one full time worker .

Unless they are in very highly paid occupations, then of course it's common sense that 2 lots of full time hours is more money than one lot of full time hours.

I work about 25-28 hours a week to fit round school hours but I'd find it unusual for neither partner to be working FT before they have kids assuming there is an element of choice about it

Yanbu we have quite a few part timers where I work, which is absolutely fine but I do get sick of hearing how tired it makes them. Well no shit sherlock i'm tired too but I don't feel the need to tell them every time I see them.