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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not build the trampoline

30 replies

Standstilling · 22/08/2019 12:09

So, the DC finally wore me down about getting a trampoline. It arrived this morning, I cut the grass and DS 11 started helping me unpack the boxes. He noticed from the picture that it has a net round it and began complaining that it made the trampoline boring. I asked him if he was being serious (he has form for ‘joking’ and being sarcastic) and he said no, he was serious. I put down the instructions and went back inside to carry on with my day.

AIBU to expect an apology from him followed by profuse offers of help to build it before I even consider not sending it back?

OP posts:
missbattenburg · 22/08/2019 12:18

YANBU - trampolines in gardens are the devil's own work...

PumpkinP · 22/08/2019 12:19

Well it would be pretty dangerous without one 😂 yanbu

IAskTooManyQuestions · 22/08/2019 12:22

Personally, I think they are antisocial and should be torched. Possibly a little of an overreaction on my part, but they have no place in suburban areas and Argos needs telling!

Ponoka7 · 22/08/2019 12:24

You want your child to beg you to put up something you've promised him, because of a thoughtless immature (because he's 11) remark?

akkakk · 22/08/2019 12:27

He is a kid :) Just be the adult and say - the trampoline is not being used without a net - if that is a problem, I can send it back - what would you like to do?

Trampolines are great - but also can be quite dangerous - using one without a net would be high risk...

Original poster
Standstilling · 22/08/2019 12:27

OK, 50:50.

I expect my DC to be grateful when I get them something they’ve asked for that is a luxury, and not start complaining before it’s even out of the box. I just need to know if IABU and too harsh.

OP posts:
Original poster
Standstilling · 22/08/2019 12:28

akkakk Thank you, you are right. I’m doing this with 3 DC on my own and have got no one to talk this stuff over with.

OP posts:
MrsGaryLightbody · 22/08/2019 12:33

Oh put it up Grin with the net on provisos that it's not right up against your neighbours fence Wink

Bootikin · 22/08/2019 12:42

He’s an ungrateful little shit. Sarcasm will not serve him well in later life. Time for him to learn to be grateful for such things and to learn to reign in the arsy comments. You stick to your guns!

canveyisland · 22/08/2019 12:44

Just send it back, IME they are used once and then collect leaves and bird poo till the end of time.

MountPheasant · 22/08/2019 12:45

I think gratitude is important. Getting away with whining about a gift could lead to him being spoilt IMO. I would tell him you expect an apology for him being rude about the nice thing you did, and when you get it I would explain exactly why the net is staying.

Original poster
Standstilling · 22/08/2019 18:56

OK, I built it (only took 5 hours and two breaks to regain my temper). All 3 DC have said ‘thanks Mum’ and ‘best thing ever!’ and are getting on with each other and laughing together. Even my 13yo eldest DD, who has hasn’t left her room this holiday unless coerced, is giggling and bouncing around.

I will take this small and lovely moment.

Thanks to you all for some perspective Flowers

OP posts:
StoneofDestiny · 22/08/2019 19:41

If you read online about dangers of garden trampolines from professional organisations, you wouldn't get one (without first getting kids gymnastic training, and being able to guarantee adult supervision every time trampoline is in use).

In addition - trampolines are a nuisance to neighbours if you live close to them for a variety of reasons often documented upon mumsnet

PumpkinP · 22/08/2019 19:44

It took 5 hours?! Wow well done for sticking at it I would have given up 😂

TanyaChix · 22/08/2019 20:07

YANBU. You’re sending a good message, which is to show appreciation. I wish more parents were like you and then there’d be fewer ungrateful so and so’s Grin

Original poster
Standstilling · 23/08/2019 10:48

Thank you to the supportive pépile and bugger off to the preachy ones who didn’t read the OP and have assumed I have not read up and weighed the pros and cons of trampolines. And also greased all the metal parts to stop the squeak, although annoyingly i didn’t realise while I was building it and have had to undo all the bolts, grease them and retighten this morning Smile

OP posts:
Original poster
Standstilling · 23/08/2019 10:49

Wtf is pepile? People!

OP posts:
Bouledeneige · 23/08/2019 11:03

Well done for persevering OP and putting it together on your own. Everyone knows that doctors and sometimes neighbours object to them. I understand both concerns (and certainly a net is essential).

However, for all the negatives explained here my (now deceased) trampoline gave my kids and their friends (and a few drunk adults) hours, weeks and years of fun. It hosted a huge amount of physical exercise (with no recorded injuries) and many hours of gossip and chat. As we watch our young people spend more and more time indoors umblically attached to social media, gaming and Netflix, and less and less kids playing independently outdoors, our trampolines contribution was of value as a haven of joy, play and exercise. I just regret that my children and their friends didn't enjoy the same amount of freedom as I did playing independently all day in the park and on a bike without any adult supervision. Fear and risk aversion is wrapping our kids in cotton wool and depriving them of their independence. So let em keep bouncing!

Disfordarkchocolate · 23/08/2019 11:07

I wanted to cry after putting together a toddler trampoline, amazing perseverance. I'd love an outside trampoline (not enough room), my little exercise one is fun but not the same.

BlackCatSleeping · 23/08/2019 11:09

Well done on getting it done. My muscles were aching the day after doing ours.

verystressedmum · 23/08/2019 11:23

Yes they need to be grateful and show appreciation but at 11 don't take it personally or that he's incredibly ungrateful. He's 11.
Glad you put it up

LeysaV · 23/08/2019 11:27

5 Hours .

Well Done OP

Lulualla · 23/08/2019 11:34

This will be me next year! My kids start their trampolining club tomorrow morning so I've said if they enjoy it and stick at it then they can have one next spring. By that time, they should know what they're doing!

AdmiralSirArchibald · 23/08/2019 11:36

I ached for days after doing ours at the start of the holiday! I'm not sure why trampolines are considered anymore anti-social than other things to be honest. We live in built up area and everyone overlooks everyone else anyway. I can't see from the trampoline anything I can't see out of the windows. I've WD40ed the springs so they don't squeak as much. My kids only play in daylight hours unlike the many neighbours bbqing into the night each weekend. Also maybe if they are high up they might avoid the clouds of cannabis smoke that seem ubiquitous nowadays!

bumblingbovine49 · 23/08/2019 11:42

My asd son uses his trampoline every day. He is almost 15 now and we had to buy a new one that was suitable for a 6 ft1 80kg adult size. It was.out best purchase ever when he was 7. Sometimes it is the only time he goes outside and gets any exercise all day. We don't allow him on it very early or late but otherwise he is free to use it whenever he wants

I don't give a monkey what the neighbours think about it.