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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To put baby in nursery when I’m not at work?

54 replies

SunflowerSunshine · 17/08/2019 18:54

DD is 13 months and currently goes to nursery 3 days a week 8-5.

I have some time owed so have an extra day off coming up.

Would I be unreasonable to still put DD in nursery and get my nails done, watch tv and take a nap instead of spending an extra day with her? I love our time together but she is absolutely exhausting and I feel like I need a break.

Mum guilt is creeping in.

Does anyone else do this?

OP posts:

tealandteal · 17/08/2019 19:12

I do this and some of the people I work with do this too! I did this a few months ago and had hair, nails etc done but also did some cleaning I can't do with toddler around. On Monday we are dropping DS to nursery and then having a date day with DH as it is my birthday (had child friendly day out today).

BikeRunSki · 17/08/2019 19:15

The only time I got time out from my dc when they were very little us when they were at nursery. DH worked away, DM and PiLs live 150+ miles away. I used to deliberately work up an extra hour or so a week in order to take a flexi day every so often. I also kept my 3 year old in nursery 3 days a week when I was on mat leave with DC2.

Kdubs1981 · 17/08/2019 19:21

Just do it! I donut all the time. Lifesaver. Please don't feel guilty

TheFatberg · 17/08/2019 19:22

I had that guilt initially, but I'm much more hands on and fun with my toddler if I've had the odd half day to rest (if I finish work early), so I figure it's win-win, especially now I'm pregnant again.

Dylaninthemovies1 · 17/08/2019 19:26

Not sure what the question is!! Are you trying to make us all jealous that you’re getting a day off to yourself.

Seriously, self care will help you be a better mother

Witchinaditch · 17/08/2019 19:28

Take the day! You deserve it, she will have fun playing and you need some time for yourself. Enjoy!

NoSauce · 17/08/2019 19:37

One day?
Don’t even think twice. Make the most of the day, do as much or as little as you like!

ArtichokeAardvark · 17/08/2019 19:40

I'm doing this for 3 days next month Booked a week off work ages ago thinking we'd go abroad but the pound is so weak I've decided to make it a staycation. DS will still do his 3 days in nursery so DH and I can actually have some time together!

CrispSandwiches19 · 17/08/2019 19:42

Do it. I would in a flash.

SaltedCaramelEverything · 17/08/2019 19:45

I came on here to say no... I have some friends who for example work 2 days but have childcare for 3 (and a cleaner etc so it’s literally a day for them and ok some chores). And I just find it a bit weird. Though I try not to judge and it’s not a situation we could ever afford so that’s probably part of it!

However, for a day or so yes go for it!! You’ll feel so much better for it and therefore a happier mum, so your daughter is still winning. Enjoy

Taswama · 17/08/2019 19:50

Go for it! And plan in a date day with your DP /DH too. My dc are now at school and we have 2 or 3 per year.

WishMyNameWasWittyNotShitty · 17/08/2019 19:56

Nope, not at all, how many days have you had to do 'you' things recently?

DC won't be any the wiser, and will have had fun at nursery and you will have had a lovely day!

Enjoy!

DamnitCharlie · 17/08/2019 19:58

I do it all the time! Our nursery is quite strict and won't let you cancel a day, only swap it for another. Whenever I have Annual Leave I keep my daughter in nursery and plan something that's child unfriendly or sleep! My daughter was a nightmare to settle into nursery so I also don't want her to get out of the habit of going by missing days here and there.

mistermagpie · 17/08/2019 20:02

I do it all the time!! My two (aged two and four) go to nursery two days a week, sometimes I take those days off work specifically to get some time to myself or me and DH both take them and have lunch together or something. It helps that I only work three days a week so I don't feel like I don't spend enough time with them anyway. Last Christmas their nursery days fell on the days between Christmas and new year, I still sent them in on one of them. They don't care, they love nursery, and I'm paying for it whether they are there or not. No guilt here and you shouldn't feel any either.

riotlady · 17/08/2019 20:15

I do this semi-regularly when I don’t have uni lectures, it’s heaven! Occasionally it lines up with one of my partners days off and we have a day date and go to the cinema or get a pub lunch. It’s somehow more fun feeling like we’re skiving school or something!

I think happy parents are one of the greatest gifts you can give a child

Leftiefterson · 17/08/2019 20:17

Christ yes do it OP. I’ve put my DD into nursery so that I could go on long cycle rides but also put her in nursery and went on a spa day. It was lovely. Don’t get me wrong I adore spending time with her but you do need a break once in a while.

Tdmama · 17/08/2019 20:19

Do it!!! Everyone needs some me time and I bet your little one loves it in Nursery!

YouOkHunz · 17/08/2019 20:20

We do this once a month - take a day off together and put DD in nursery
And once every 3 months I take a day off whilst she is at nursery to get my hair done otherwise it would never get done!

Silversun83 · 17/08/2019 20:29

Have just gone back to work in new job after having DC2 (who's 17 months) and one of the things I was most looking forward to was annual leave

DH and I are taking a week's leave in five weeks' time (not that I'm counting!! ) and we're still putting both DC in nursery for the two days they would normally go. Will be the first time just us two since my csection to have DC2! Think one of the days we'll just spend sorting things around the house but probably do something nice the second day.

Will be just our luck that one of them will be ill that week!

So no, YANBU

GoGoGoGoGo · 17/08/2019 20:29

Do it! Time for yourself is still so important.

If you’ve paid for it use it. I work shifts and if my shifts landed on a weekend my DC still went to nursery on their two days in the week. I used to catch up on housework, get anything done that needed doing, go to the gym or meet friends for coffee. Why not? I’m still me, not just ‘mum’.

Hollie089 · 17/08/2019 20:41

Did the exact same this week. Zero guilt.

Beaverdam · 17/08/2019 21:04

Do it.

FartnissEverbeans · 17/08/2019 21:09

It’s the school holidays so I’m off work but my son is going to into nursery tomorrow.

He’s a little star and the best thing in the world but he is not inclined to chill out and I NEED to chill out!

He’ll be spending a few days in nursery before I go back to work. He loves it and I’m much more fun when he’s at home because I’ve had a break. Also, DH and I don’t have any babysitters on hand (we live overseas, no family in the country) so this is our only chance to spend some time together.

Sciurus83 · 17/08/2019 21:19

Came on to day absolutely do it and dont feel guilty, but then read that people are taking days off with DH and my heart is singing...we could do that too!! Imagine! Oh the joy!

PotatoesPastaAndBread · 17/08/2019 21:21

When i read your title i thought you were going to say on a permanent basis! For one day??? I wouldn't think twice. Nursery is good for kids, they get so much out of it. Time to yourself is good for you, you need to recharge. Win-win.

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