To think there's no excuse for being smelly?

[ohflowerofscotland]

eating out with DM and a lady has walked in and the smell of body odour was overpowering, so much so that it really put me off eating and made me feel sick.

what's the excuse for such poor hygiene? I've never understood it

Not everyone lives in a nice, well-equipped house with access to adequate washing facilities for either themselves or their clothes.
A woman I know had to move into temporary accommodation when her relationship broke down. She had to leave with just the clothes on her back into a refuge and then into a 1 room bedsit with a shared bathroom. It was several months before she got a house. Yes, there are reasons why someone might smell. You just have to open your mind a bit and realise that not everyone has the same nice, comfortable life that you have.

The people I have met who reek ‘didn’t believe in deodorant’. One used water spray stuff from holland&barrett- it didn’t work. The other just didn’t use anything. They showered in the morning but because they didn’t use deodorant they stunk.

I have taught many children who smell. BO, dirty clothes, smoke, unwashed sweat etc. Reasons are Usually linked to poverty, neglect and parental mental health issues. Often there is no hot water to bathe or shower in. There is no washing machine - or the electricity money has been spent on something else. Parents so locked up with their own issues that they forget to bathe or even feed their children. Kids with a mouthful of rotten teeth. Nits infested.
We used to have school nurses, dentists (remember those chewy sweets that made your teeth change colour), a bit nurse etc. None of these exist - yet we need them.
Sadly poverty is a cycle that is hard to escape.

Having done a day's physical work on a warm day?

Wearing polyester! It's hard not to these days but I avoid it at all costs because I know it makes me smell regardless of how much washing and deodorant I do.

Plus all the things others have said.

It's not good or "acceptable" but sometimes it's unavoidable.

*nit

I suppose that anybody can have a bad day, where they've forgotten to apply deodorant, or used a new brand that isn't working for them, or whatever.

But for people who regularly smell, it is generally combined with poor mental health or abject poverty.

In fact, I know two people who smell. One lives shared a house with many other adults and no showers, just a single bath. She says it is difficult to book enough bathroom time for a bath so she uses the sink to wash herself with a flannel, and frankly it doesn't work.

The other person doesn't believe in using toiletries at all - no shampoo, deodorant, nothing. I think she uses a fluoride-free toothpaste, but that's it.

Even if it is MH does that mean other people should have to stomach it?

A colleague smells horrendous, has done for years. he has some kind of issue with MH or quite possibly ASD although not sure what. He never washes, everything he owns and touches is covered in grime. I have lost sympathy after two hot summers sitting opposite.

I think everyone's being a bit unreasonable because there are so many reasons people smell, and so many smells we may or may not react to.

Some people smell so strongly of cigarettes that I feel nauseous.

Some people smell very strongly of curry- doesn't bother me at all, but bothers my friend a lot.

BO doesn't bother me that much, to be honest. It's an honest, healthy kind of smell.

A family I worked with smelled really bad- not bo bad, really bad. Like, dirty rotten kind of bad. You knew whether they had arrived for a meeting before you, as the smell in reception would alert you. They were genuinely dirty.

No excuse. The mental health I can understand to a point but if you can function to get dressed and go out you can have a wash IMO. It’s inconsiderate to everyone else just as bad as being offensive in other ways like swearing/drunk behaviour etc.

Wow! This is a kind thread. I showered this morning and put on deodorant. However I take medication that makes me sweat like nothing I’ve ever known. I was wearing cotton and run a lot (so am physically fit), but a quick walk carrying toddler and backpack to catch a bus left me sweaty and an hour later smelly. Thanks for making me and others who take life-saving (but sweat-inducing) medication feel like shit. Maybe we should just never leave the house.

Many decades ago as a 20-something nurse I had a colleague who stank - it was a mixture of musty clothes and BO. When you went into a room you could smell that she'd been there.

Unbelievably she was very glamorous, big hair and full make-up (think 1980s Dynasty look) with a long-term boyfriend. Honestly we used to go off night shift with a headache!

In the end one of the senior staff had to have a word with her, and lo and behold the smell stopped. For some inexplicable reason she didn't wash or change her uniform as often as is needed, i.e. every day!

She must have been going days without washing. There doesn't have to be an underlying health/homeless reason.

Just strange.

I don't think that kind of smelly bothers people, Asmuch. It's the long term dirty reek that's offensive.

I work with a lot of people who have come to the US from third world countries. They don't wash as often as we're used to here, and they frequently don't use deodorant either. Their cultural norms are not our cultural norms.

Another person I knew had lost her sense of smell. She just wasn't aware that her house was musty smelling.

Not all of them, of course, but it's not unusual.

I've struggled with MH for years but I would never leave the house knowing I hadn't washed or at least put a bit of deodorant on.

But that's your mental health. Not all mental health

I used to work with someone that stank. There were no other issues than he didn't wash or change his clothes often enough. It was grim.

"No excuse. The mental health I can understand to a point but if you can function to get dressed and go out you can have a wash IMO."..@Boobindoops...so You aren't aware or come across people with brain issues then? Or people with the condition where no amount of washing or deodorant will mask it?

I’ve met several smelly people in my lifetime

I’ve never met any who got up in the morning and thought “I fancy being smelly today”

YABU

Hyperhydrosis is not a reason to smell. My daughter has it, her hands get wet and the back of her legs. She has medication she can take to dry it out. She's never once smelled, because she showers daily and uses deodorants and her clothes are clean. Just like most other people. My friends son also has it, he takes the medication constantly as he has it quite bad, but he also has never smelled, again because he maintains his hygiene,

When sweat smells it's because it's stale. There is other medical issues that can cause someone's sweat to smell, but hyperhyrdosis is certainly not one of them.

Generally I've found people with bad body odours often can't smell it. Or they can but don't realise it's so bad and others can smell it. Often I'd say it's to do with mental health issues.

I went to school with a girl who had bad body odour, her clothes were always clean and ironed but when I called on her one day, the smell of the house when she opened the door was overwhelming, as it turned out none of the family wore deodorant and they couldn't smell themselves, the father had a physical job and even though the clothes were washed the smell hung in them, I felt very sorry for her, as she was a lovely girl and even though she started using sprays and things as we got older at school she still has the smell on her from the rest of the family,

Oh and in addition I’d rather smell a bit of bo than stinky perfume or aftershave

Unless there is a genuine, genuine medical excuse then there is no need to not have basic personal hygiene.

This is true, sort of. It would be an excuse, if it is medical it's a reason. People with medical ailments don't need to 'excuse' themselves.

But, who are you to decide who does and doesn't have a medical reason? That woman walking her dog who you posted about may just have a reason.

@haverhill

Nope, 20 years later, in the south west. It's been 15 years since I last saw her but even remembering is making my stomach turn. Poor girl.

I work in a job which is quite close vicinity to people (dentist) and in my experience at least 50% of people smell a bit, particularly towards the evening, even more probably have whiffy breath. It doesn't bother me really, no one purposefully smells.

Most of the time its mental health, most of the people who are really smelly have mental health problems, sometimes dementia, also things like autism as well.

Sometimes it's a bad day, I've been known to be in a rush and forget deodorant, woke up late no time to shower etc.

Older people may smell as they don't like bathing/showering when they are alone in the house in case they fall over.

Poverty as well.

There's loads and loads of reasons. In my job you spend a lot of time trying to get people to basically up their personal hygiene but I guess I am also quite forgiving when people aren't, because you can't help people change if you pretend to not understand why they don't in the first place. And you learn to get over smells really quickly.

It doesn't take much empathy to understand why people may smell tbh