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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think this might be our worst holiday ever?

94 replies

Oneborneverydecade · 10/08/2019 17:15

We're in the South of France for 2 weeks, arrived Wed. We're staying in a small s/c apartment (think 1 main room, separate tiny kids room and bathroom), no pool but 5 mins from popular sandy beach. We have budgeted £100 per day but obviously France is kinda pricey.
The main problem is the kids; they're 12, 7 and 16 months. The 12 and 7 don't get on, the 12 yo is very much a teenager, the 7 yo has anger issues and the toddler is wonderful but obviously demanding. Plus she still naps twice a day. They're entirely dependent on us for entertainment.
DH is great and does all the cooking, plays with the older 2 at beach etc. We have a hire car.
I know we'd be better off with somewhere with kids clubs - but our accommodation was free so this is a cheap holiday for us.
So AIBU to think this is the hardest it's ever going to be?

OP posts:

Hedgehogblues · 10/08/2019 18:22

I'd feel like I was rolling in it if I had a budget for £100 a day

LittleSweet · 10/08/2019 18:27

I got screamed at and kicked in the stomach on holiday by my dcs last year. Ds1 has just started being very rude to me just now and it's our first night. Dh won't stand up for me and sshhes me like I'm a child and has been short with me. My cat died on Thursday. I've got an upset ibs tummy, I feel sick and have a headache because of the crying and I'm getting shit instead .

VenusTiger · 10/08/2019 18:33

OP, @youarenotkiddingme has this spot on. Don’t split the money into days, split it into events.

MarshaBradyo · 10/08/2019 18:36

I just did a hot holiday with 14yr, 10 and 18 months

Eldest swam a lot, lazed around and read a bit like what I’d do, plus entertained littlest

Middle swam loads and played with youngest

Youngest was hardest as didn’t like the midday heat so we tag teamed and she’d have a nap in the A/C room while the other had the holiday part with the older two

Taking turns is the way to go

speakout · 10/08/2019 18:38

I sympathise OP, sounds like hell TBH, We have had some family holidays that were not thought out enough and turned out disasters.
I don't know if you have driven over or flown, but I would be thinking about an early return home.
If your accommodation was free and you are driving I would suggest visitig a few interesting places on the way back, using some of your spending money to book hotels and find some fun.
Or split up as a family ( not literally) , and go separate ways for a week.
Look at combinations of family members taking off elsewhere or staying or a meandering trip home.

My kids are older and whole family holidays haven;t worked for a while. We are a happy family , but like different things.
THis year DD and I went on a beach holiday to Greece, OH and DS went on a city break in Europe.

Everyone had a good time.

cushioncovers · 10/08/2019 18:43

You have my sympathy op. Trouble with holidays like the one you've booked is its the same shit but in different place. Still cooking, washing and trying to entertain bored kids. Just try to make the best of it and leave for home a few days early if you really need to.

bewilderedhedgehog · 10/08/2019 18:46

I haven't read the whole thread (sorry!) but am very keen to post! I used to go to this area with my three (I was/am a single parent). Age gaps very similar, 12 yrs, 6 yrs, 3 yrs. We had a great time and the Pont du Gard is great! My suggestions:

If you go to Pont du Gard, one of you can go canoeing with the 2 eldest, the other can spend time with the little one near the river etc. The museum is great there too!
If you are self catering there are brilliant markets - they can choose easy stuff to eat with little effort required.
I had a half hour break in the village square each evening, when my 12 year old (very sensible) looked after the smaller ones, to have a small glass of wine and chill. It was lovely.
I got them to go to the bakery every day to buy the bread - they loved it (no roads to cross)
Swimming!! all the time preferably

I do hope you enjoy it. If not double the time spent on no 3 above!

bewilderedhedgehog · 10/08/2019 18:48

ps - I have spent quite a lot of time in this part of France - if you say where you are I'll happily think about it and offer a few ideas?

breaconoptimist · 10/08/2019 18:58

Any holiday with an under 5 is going to be a bit tricky, 7 is also not quite into the good travelling age. I’d lower my expectations, if you go into it thinking it’s all going to be wonderful it’s unlikely, especially if you haven’t done this type of holiday before.

soberfabulous · 10/08/2019 18:58

YANBU. TBH I think I'd rather stay at home ham try to cope with that. Good luck.

hopefulhalf · 10/08/2019 19:04

I second what others have said . We holidayed in France loads as children we had a very big age gap (12 years). I remember the best year being on a very tight budget and Mum sent us (Me and Dsis aged 14 and 12) with the days pinic budget to buy food-we loved it. Then beach all afternoon and cards, we saved enough from the food budget to go canoeing at the end of the week !

Fortysix · 10/08/2019 19:06

Could you get the 12 year old to be your family photographer and task them to take lovely photos every day and say you will make a photo book of their work - a sort of fun project with a purpose and a gives them some independence too?
Could the seven year old learn to ride the bike - 30 mins every day would do it . (one adult teaching them in secret from the rest of the family so they can give everyone a big surprise when they manage and be celebrated)

IloveJudgeJudy · 10/08/2019 19:18

I've just come on this thread to say there are some really good ideas on here. We, too, have often holidayed in southern France. We love the Pont du Gard.

I definitely second going to the bakery each morning to buy breakfast pastries, although that might be pretty expensive, or every other day?

I don't know how far you are from the Gorges du Verdon, but they're pretty spectacular. We used to take it in turns to choose ice creams from the supermarket- much cheaper than buying from a shop.

I'd also recommend going to a market and after a walk around, sit at a cafe and people watch for a bit

I really like the idea of tasking the 12yo with taking photos and making it a project.

We used very much to be a beach type of family as it's free entertainment. Is there a river/lake near? They're sometimes better than the beach.

Don't give up. It could turn out to be a great holiday. You just need to decide what you're going to do. I also advocate day out then lazy day...

EdWinchester · 10/08/2019 19:26

My philosophy post kids was that anywhere we holiday has to be as nice or better than our house in uk.

Cramming fractious, squabbling kids into a grotty holiday let puts you on the back foot straight away.

However, you’re there now so should make the best of it. Try to wear out the younger ones as much as possible.

Skyejuly · 10/08/2019 19:32

We did sc in france for 100 for the week?!

Original poster

Oneborneverydecade · 10/08/2019 20:20

holiday some lovely ideas, thank you. My DH has been rising early to take DD to buy pastries, leaving me in bed. And we have been playing a new card game which is a novelty for us

itsonly there's a camp site very close by, I think you can just use the pool, I'll look into it. And splitting up at Pont du Gard is a good idea, though I think I might feel a bit hard done by. We're about an hour from Nimes so that and Avignon are definitely possibilities

OP posts:

mellicauli · 10/08/2019 20:22

A lot of villages (eg meze, sete, Montagnac ) have free festivals with all sorts of entertainment at this time of year ( water jousting, fireworks, cheeses bands/dancing, markets) Ask in tourist info what’s on when. Also ask about for local parcs de loisirs. They often have cheap kids entertainment (mini golf, playgrounds, swimming pools, Zips wires etc). Montpelier is a lovely town to wander round. Kids liked going on the tram for fun.

Original poster

Oneborneverydecade · 10/08/2019 20:29

bewildered thank you for your post we're on the coast by Grau du Roi. We've been to Pont du Gard a couple of times but someone has always been to young to kayak - I think we may have to split up
judgejudy thank you, Gorges du Verdon does look fab, unfortunately it's over 3 hours drive away

Thank you for all your comments, we've had a better evening (toddler was asleep by 8pm rather than 10pm ) and I've put a bottle of wine into chill, tomorrow is a new day

OP posts:

bewilderedhedgehog · 10/08/2019 20:30

I've just remembered - we used to do a thing where everyone chose 2 things to do on holiday. all used to like the choosing and then everyone got to do something they really wanted to do, would that work?

matahairyy · 10/08/2019 20:30

Why are you doing trips? Just to the beach

Itsonlytuesdayqwer · 10/08/2019 20:32

ooh I forgot about the fetes and this time of year, lots of small french villages have them. A few fair rides, local food, a bit of dancing - great cheap way to spend the evening so deffo keep an eye out for that!

matahairyy · 10/08/2019 20:32

Your h must learn to drive on return and teach that 7 yo to ride a bike while you are there

PennyPitStop19 · 10/08/2019 20:37

It sounds nice sorry.

Original poster

Oneborneverydecade · 10/08/2019 20:45

mata he can drive, we just didn't pay the extra for him to drive here. I love the idea of my 12yo teaching my 7yo to ride his bike, unfortunately he's very wary even with my DH and I - I think we missed a window and now he's scared of hurting himself
I'm really struggling with DD on the beach tbh, she not interested in her toys, even in really shallow water she wants to be stood on your lap and then she starts wandering the beach like a magpie looking for other peoples things. It's normal 16 mo behaviour but exhausting after an hour or so

OP posts:

matahairyy · 10/08/2019 20:45

God it IS. I remember

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