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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To get a puppy?

112 replies

Inatizzielizzie · 10/08/2019 08:49

Just to be clear we are still researching and haven't made a decision but it would be so helpful for any advice!

Here are our circumstances-

We have small terraced house and patio walking distance to large parks with woods and a fenced dog park with woodland. We do feel fairly cramped but the reality is we don't want to move.

Twin boys starting school in September.

I work p/t freelance (3 days a week, all home based).

Husband works from home 2-4 days per week.

We are very outdoorsy, spend most free time outside and holiday in the uk.

Does this sound a good time to get a dog? Is it madness? My family are not dog people and keep saying we are far too busy for a dog. Would we realistically struggle to find the time?! I want to consider everything before making this life changing and life long decision.

Thanks in advance!

OP posts:
Moonflower12 · 10/08/2019 11:19

Borders are lovely. We have a spaniel but our vet has a border who loves coming to visit to play with my 6 yo DD.

Fucksandflowers · 10/08/2019 11:19

Vislas are pretty big...
But to be honest, if you are an active family and like big dogs which from the suggestion of Lab and golden I assume you do but don't like smell and hair a visla sounds like a good match.

bodgeitandscarper · 10/08/2019 11:19

Whippets can be fine with cats and are great dogs; I have a lurcher with six cats.

Fucksandflowers · 10/08/2019 11:22

About the cats though.

Whippets are coursing dogs so I'm not sure I would recommend though a pup that's grown up with cats will probably be okay with 'their' cats.

Vislas and labs and goldens are all gundogs and some have quite high prey drive, though I wouldn't have thought quite as a high as a sighthound like a whippet.

Don't know about poodles but they were originally bred as gundogs too.

adaline · 10/08/2019 11:27

Vizslas are not small dogs! They're gorgeous but they're a lot of work - not a breed I would pick with small children and a house with little outdoor space - it's not fair on the dog. They need a lot of exercise and can be exceptionally clingy too.

You're also going to need to think about what you're going to do when you can't take the dog out with you. For example, dogs can't go to zoos, or supermarkets, or theme parks. They're banned from lots of beaches in the summer months. You also can't leave a puppy very long (and ideally an adult not longer than four hours a day).

Can you afford a walker/sitter/daycare when you want to go out without the dog? Mine goes to my in-laws when we want a day out but a lot of people don't have that option. Luckily my FIL loves our dog and is happy to have him so we can go to the zoo/shops/cinema/wherever without worrying about getting back in time for the dog.

Not all breeds are suited to being left alone and you especially can't leave a young puppy for long unless you want to come back to puddles of wee!

XXcstatic · 10/08/2019 11:28

Vislas and labs and goldens are all gundogs and some have quite high prey drive

Is that true? IME, dogs bred to retrieve, as opposed to kill, don't have a high prey drive. They love to retrieve and - if you're unlucky - they might to try to retrieve something alive, but they are not fixated on chasing or killing. A retriever with a high prey drive would be a bad gundog because you need a retriever to have a soft mouth and only to retrieve the animal you have shot, not go charging around willy-nilly.

Adollop · 10/08/2019 11:39

IME working cockers are just as crazy as springers, need a LOT of exercise and they need to use their brains a lot too or they get bored.

Hoppinggreen · 10/08/2019 11:44

Labs and Goldens dont have a high prey drive generally
Even if they were to chase a cat they usually give up pretty quickly abiding do much harm if they by some miracle manage to catch something.
My GR found a baby bird last week, he was terrified!

MsMarvellous · 10/08/2019 11:53

@Inatizzielizzie the first three weeks were hard. He had to be supervised constantly for toilet training and he hates being left even for short bedtime and bath time. It's got so much easier now bough as I can leave him downstairs for short periods and he doesn't go bonkers.

I was on my knees sleepwise at first but it's totally been worth it.

Ellmau · 10/08/2019 11:56

I think you'd be OK with a whippet puppy growing up with cats - most likely one will scratch his nose when he behaves too rambunctiously and he will learn respect for the felines ;)

Not familiar with viszlas, but your other breed suggestions are all good for kids. The main issue with labs is that they eat EVERYTHING, including things you wouldn't think of as edible, such as toys, clothes, etc. They are the greediest dogs in the world imho.

Retrievers another great family dog, but sheddy.

Miniature poodle might be perfect for you with a smaller house - they're bright and enjoy training, but have nice characters. Nonshedding too.

I might steer clear of spaniels for you - every spaniel I've ever met has had a fantastic child-friendly temperament - but they've also all been mad as a box of frogs with unexhaustable energy. Although you do say you spend a lot of time outdoors, so maybe one would work for you.

Another suggestion: I know you said no terriers, but Soft Coated Wheaten Terriers are not that terrierish behaviourwise and good with kids, and another nonshedding breed. Not that common here though.

SomewhereInbetween1 · 10/08/2019 11:58

Would you consider a cocker spaniel? I know they seem to have this rep of being hyper etc but that's really not the case. We have two and whilst they love to play, they really are both far more into affection than anything else. Very cuddly, nice and calm indoors and quick to train as they're a very intelligent breed.

CallMeRachel · 10/08/2019 11:59

We are very outdoorsy, spend most free time outside and holiday in the uk.

Be prepared for the number of snotty anti-dog people who don't think dogs should be anywhere near children in parks, woods and open areas. This can make taking the dog out with the kids a nightmare.

The relentless walking 2-3 times a day all year, every day including Xmas without support is hard. It does become a chore. A terraced house with small patio doesn't sound ideal tbh. Not much room to go out and play with a ball or get kids involved while you clean the floors etc, I'd imagine the dog will bark and annoy the neighbours.

Maybe borrow a dog for a couple of weeks before you decide. They can live for up to 16 years so it's a big commitment.

Booboostwo · 10/08/2019 13:14

I wouldn’t consider a large breed with a very small garden, you’ll be doing so much more work with walking!

Also, a small/medium dog is easier to cope with until it learns not to pull on the lead, jump up, etc. My latest GSD weighed 13 kilos when he first came home from his breeder at 9 weeks. He’s 2.5yo now and at 37kgs he is the lightest GSD i’ve ever had and still very large. A Goldie would be 20-25kgs.

Original poster
Inatizzielizzie · 10/08/2019 13:29

Thanks everyone! So much great advice! Off to research things. I hear all the warnings re a big dog so need to carefully consider if a lab etc is too big. I think except the cats whippets seem absolutely perfect! Any advice on where to go to research them more? Are they really good with children usually? Seem to be!

OP posts:
Confusedbeetle · 10/08/2019 13:35

There is a high chance your old cat will freak out and run away. If he is 15 let him have his last days in peace. Its easier to introduce a kitten to an established dog than the other way round

Original poster
Inatizzielizzie · 10/08/2019 13:37

She sleeps all day in my bedroom which is the loft room. Her food, water and litter box is in the corner of the room, as is her tree. I cannot remember when she last came downstairs! So I doubt she would be aware of the dog. The other 2 run around the whole house.

OP posts:
Original poster
Inatizzielizzie · 10/08/2019 13:38

All 3 are indoor only cats if that makes a difference!

OP posts:
StillMedusa · 10/08/2019 13:45

I have a 13 week old puppy (and two cats) and we are first time owners.
We spent a lot of time researching breeds. I would have liked to have a rescue but as one of my (young adult) sons has special needs we decided to have a dog that has been bred with specific traits.
We spoke to lots of breeders (from their own breed club) went to Discover Dogs days... and waited.

The cats have moved upstairs (but haven't left ..) we spend lots of time up there reminding them that we haven't ruined their lives.. 4 weeks in and they won't come in the living room (stairgated) but are getting used to the puppy slowly. I reckon it will be at least a year, realistically before they are ok with her.

I am KNACKERED. It is JUST like having a baby again. She has been brilliant as puppies go... only 3 wees and no poos in the house in a month. She now sleeps downstairs but the second one of us is awake we have to go to her or she will cry.

She has a crate but chooses to go in for naps.. I am not shutting her in and don't plan to, it's just not for her, and we don't have small children, but do have 4 young adult ones here.

I can't 'nip out' to the shop. Or the shower for that matter (to be fair I left her downstairs for 20 mins yesterday while I got sorted but that's the best so far)
She has been a really easy puppy so far, but the adjustment is huge.

Ps Have a look at Eurasiers.. :)

Original poster
Inatizzielizzie · 10/08/2019 13:54

Wow! That sounds v v full on! Sounds like you are doing a brilliant job and hopefully enjoying your pup.

OP posts:
SomewhereInbetween1 · 10/08/2019 14:00

StillMedusa only three wees and two poos indoors?? Good grief, what an amazing puppy! You got so lucky!

StillMedusa · 10/08/2019 14:04

SomewhereInbetween1 NO poos indoors... not one!
We have been very lucky I know!!!

NoSauce · 10/08/2019 14:08

Sounds good OP.

Do your homework breeder wise if you go down the puppy root. Phone the breed secretary for a list of puppies and go and see the breed in the home environment before even thinking about buying a puppy.

Used responsibly crates have their use. They stop your pup from rampaging while you’re getting the dc ready for school, when you’re out for short periods, cooking dinner etc. Otherwise they can cause havoc and can get themselves into all sorts of trouble. Done correctly they are a god send.

I’m going to suggest a standard poodle. Lovely, steady, intelligent dogs that don’t moult, responsive to training and very loving.

NoSauce · 10/08/2019 14:08

Route not root Shock

Wolfiefan · 10/08/2019 14:18

How will having indoor only cats work when toilet training a pup? You will have to be taking the dog out after food and water and playing and napping and at least every half an hour too. My two cats would escape!

Beagled · 10/08/2019 14:20

My ‘puppy’ is 16 months now. The early days are incredibly difficult. I wondered what on Earth I’d done. Also google ‘post puppy depression’ (it’s a thing and caught me off guard). Supervising the kids and the puppy was the hardest part for sure. They do take a lot of time but it soon becomes the norm. It’s brought our family together for sure. Makes us spend more time together. You’re set up sounds great.

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